Can’t do right for doing wrong
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I have allowed my husband to stay at home since the knock 8 months ago purely for the sake of the children because soon enough once cour etc.... happens their lives will be blown apart and as a mother I have tried to limit the damage to them. To the outside world we are behaving like a family but behind closed doors it's a different story. We barely speak spend time in separate rooms once the children are in bed, we do do things with the children but nothing together.
I am really worried that once social services come back after conviction and local people might find out about this then I will be judged and penalised for allowing to be at home and a dad. I know that we will separate but feel like no one will understand why I have tolerated him for these last few months.
don't get me wrong it has been hard, I am broken and hate him for what he has done but I didn't want the children to suffer
I don't love him anymore and my marriage is in tatters and over. He also tried to commit suicide at the time of arrest so I feel like I need to just keep an eye on him .
any advice please?
I am really worried that once social services come back after conviction and local people might find out about this then I will be judged and penalised for allowing to be at home and a dad. I know that we will separate but feel like no one will understand why I have tolerated him for these last few months.
don't get me wrong it has been hard, I am broken and hate him for what he has done but I didn't want the children to suffer
I don't love him anymore and my marriage is in tatters and over. He also tried to commit suicide at the time of arrest so I feel like I need to just keep an eye on him .
any advice please?
Thank you Lee, comforting and helpful as always
I am sorry but i disagee with this, if you want to leave him, leave now not after he is senences. My dil did this, she left the day my son was sentenced and for 14 montnts she stood by him, she came on holiday with us and he webnt on holiday with her parents. As my son has said if she had left as soon as it happened he would have got over it, as she not spoken to him since that day and has filed for a divorce.
Fatso I'm sorry you were hurt by your dil actions but I can only imagine that she was hurting a lot too. I also imagine as a caring mother you would have wanted less hurt for your son at a difficult time. People react how they feel they have to at the time. Every situation is different, every reaction is different, and there will be tipping points and lines drawn in different places.
All of the stories in here are far from an ideal situation and people are trying to make sense of trauma. Trauma literally affects the neuro pathways in our brains and the hormones in our bodies. That is going to affect the way we make decisions and of course that has an impact on others.
We're all in the same storm just in different boats. We can only chose how to captain our own
All of the stories in here are far from an ideal situation and people are trying to make sense of trauma. Trauma literally affects the neuro pathways in our brains and the hormones in our bodies. That is going to affect the way we make decisions and of course that has an impact on others.
We're all in the same storm just in different boats. We can only chose how to captain our own