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Sadness and waste

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Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Sun November 21, 2021 8:27pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Mon November 22, 2021 7:34pm

Judith

Member since
June 2021

195 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 1:01amReport post

Hello Smile

The fall out from these crimes pervades every aspect of our lives. As you say even happy experiences are blighted by sadness, anger and deception. An older friend was proudly showing us some photos of his grandchild and it occurred to me he probably wouldn't do that if he knew our situation. My husband isn't actually attracted to children and accessed images in his craving for ever more extreme stimulation, but it is unlikely.our friend would appreciate the distinction.

All we can do is try to enjoy those happy moments for what they are and believe that despite your son's current situation he will also have better times ahead.

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 4:47amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Mon November 22, 2021 7:34pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 4:22pmReport post

Hi Smile

It's just heartwrenching isn't it I visited my son again on Sunday and he has all but given up and just dosent want to live with this and everything else since the knock I am just at a total loss I never imagined my life to be like this

I keep saying if only! two small words that mean so much

But it's happened and I cant do anything apart to be there for my son who I love with all my broken heart

Sending a virtual hug xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 5:39pmReport post

Ahh bless you.... my heart goes out to you.... I had a tear when I read your post x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 5:58pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Mon November 22, 2021 7:34pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 7:07pmReport post

Smile

Yep no heating either where my son is most of the days it's in lockdown he has managed to get a job its crap but keeps him out of the cell for a few hours a day it's the weekends where he struggles so much as stuck in the cell I know he should be punished for his crime but I can see the life draining out of him at every visit and can hear it in his voice when he phones but I guess for all of us here it's the same for our loved ones but my god it hurts so much xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 7:28pmReport post

App theres long waiting lists for jobs and courses where my son is. He's recently started education (English) and what a change I sense in his confidence. He's put his name down for a'behaviour management' course. I've encouraged him to grab all the opportunities that come along.

What I find helps is to write a list of things to talk about / even funny things that have happened in the past to lighten things up a little.

Edited Mon November 22, 2021 9:14pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 7:47pmReport post

Hi Smile

He is on remand at the moment was RUI for 16 months then re arrested and kept in his sentancing isn't until the new year so no idea what he is looking at that's if he can keep going it's just so difficult and I am hanging on by a thread just all the worry I have to keep strong but easier said

This forum is a god send but not the place I could ever imagined I would be a part off I guess we all think the same :-( xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Mon November 22, 2021 9:17pmReport post

Like I've said time & time again I feel so sorry for all you ladies left hanging on a thread with no conclusion or time scale. Traumatic almost as if it's like that to make you suffer!

Edited Mon November 22, 2021 9:25pm