Family and Friends Forum

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Tue November 30, 2021 8:59pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Thu December 2, 2021 4:46pm

Carmela

Member since
November 2020

87 posts

Posted Tue November 30, 2021 11:31pmReport post

I wish we could go into more detail on here but understand we cant always.

do you have anyone feeling the same as you? From what I've read a few family members don't want anything to do with your son, is there any that don't feel like that?

It's like grief but you can't talk about and share happy memories of your loved one which is so hard.



im so pleased your son is making good progress in prison and he has a second chance when he gets out.

xxx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 4:14amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed December 1, 2021 12:53pm

Lola53

Member since
May 2021

269 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 9:12amReport post

Utterly heartbreaking. I can't listen to Christmas music and when people comment on the stress of organising Christmas, quite frankly I'd like to punch them! Wouldn't it be lovely if all we had to worry about was buying a few presents (insert eye roll here). It's also the heartbreak of the happy memories, which feel now as if they were based on lies. So yep, totally understand :-( xx

Grace Hush

Member since
August 2021

145 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 10:07amReport post

I too am finding Christmas incredibly distressing. I'm facing my first Christmas without my son. I'm fortunate to have supportive family though, is there a friend you can talk to smile? It must be so hard for you having to choose between people you love dearly. X

I know what you mean about people moaning about every day occurrences Lola, oh what we would give to go back to those days! X

I've always felt Christmas should be less commercial with less pressure as it's so painful for those going through tough time. Now I'm living it and it hurts more than I ever could have imagined!

We will all get through it in whatever way we need to. Sending strength to you all x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 10:53amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed December 1, 2021 2:37pm

Fatso

Member since
November 2019

107 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 11:22amReport post

This will be 2nd christmas wihout my son. we are not doing nanything have been invited for christmas lunch but we will not go as feel so gulity thinking about him being where he is and us having a good time. Thankfully our friend undertand.

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 11:38amReport post

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Edited Thu December 2, 2021 4:46pm

Scared mum

Member since
November 2021

3 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 12:52pmReport post

I feel for you in your situation. My Christmas is tainted again this year. The knock came this time last year so last Christmas was hard. Although he's just been convicted, sentencing isn't till the end of January. My saving grace is that he, my son, is home with me but still have this hanging over us again.

Edited Wed December 1, 2021 9:35pm

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 2:20pmReport post

Absolutely. My partner is being sentenced tmw. Me and my kids dont know if he will be around or not. We dont know if it will be in the media or not. I'm feeling pretty worried and upset and Xmas on top of that feels like a bit of a joke. Struggling to keep my shit together really.

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2546 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 2:31pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Sun December 5, 2021 6:51am

Grace Hush

Member since
August 2021

145 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 3:44pmReport post

Sending love Len, an incredibly stressful time but at least it signals the end of limbo.

I hope the judge is fair and everything works out as well as it can do.

Whatever the outcome you will get through this difficult time x

Dawn14

Member since
June 2021

472 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 5:40pmReport post

Hi Len



Good luck for tomorrow and if it does go in the papers ( hopefully not ) it doesn't last long they soon move, I certainly no that doesn't help or make it any better but if u can just ride 1 more wave then as people say u can slowly move on x

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 8:09pmReport post

Good luck for tomorrow Len I hope it goes as well as it can sending hugs xx

Christmas this year I cant face it to be honest but I still have my other adult children to think of so as much as I would just like to stay in bed for the festive period I cant we are all struggling with it this year! x

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Wed December 1, 2021 10:48pmReport post

Really appreciate your love and well wishes thank you. Constantly amazed by all the strength, resilience and support shown on this forum. X

Lola53

Member since
May 2021

269 posts

Posted Thu December 2, 2021 8:31amReport post

Good luck for today Len - you know that everyone on here will be thinking of you and feeling your pain. Could you let us know how you get on? xx

Cloud

Member since
May 2021

153 posts

Posted Thu December 2, 2021 2:00pmReport post

Thinking of you today Len xx sending strength x

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Fri December 3, 2021 6:23pmReport post

Just an update. My partner (currently seperated)got 10yrs suspended for 2yrs and 10yrs shpo and sor. No media reporting allowed as my children may be identifiable. So certainly a relief for my kids and me. Hopefully we now have no more in limbo and it is now about rebuilding what we can.

Holding in the light all the women and men whose partners have had custodial or been in the media particularly. It is so tough and I wish I could be there for you all in person.

LemonDrizzleCake

Member since
April 2021

20 posts

Posted Fri December 3, 2021 6:43pmReport post

Len I bet you're so relieved that the limbo is over and you can start to rebuild your lives.

I think my biggest fear is if anything goes in the media - please I hope you don't mind me asking, you say your husband's case had no media reporting allowed as your children may be identifiable? I understand if you don't want to say anymore than that, but if you do feel able to, how did that come about? Did you request it with the solicitor? I thought it was unusual to have a media ban allowed so am curious to see if we could apply the same to my husband's case if needed.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Fri December 3, 2021 6:47pmReport post

Len

It must be a relief for you all

I wish you all the very best on rebuilding and for the future

Hugs sent xx

Chelsea 1

Member since
June 2021

891 posts

Posted Fri December 3, 2021 7:25pmReport post

Hiya Len.

Thats fantastic news. Now you can sort of get on with your life.

If you don't mind. What did he get the sentence for.

Sorry for asking.

Big ((hugs)) xx

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Sat December 4, 2021 7:55amReport post

I just wrote it wrong its 10mths.

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Sat December 4, 2021 7:55amReport post

His sentence was for voyeurism and indecent images of a minor.

Len

Member since
May 2021

27 posts

Posted Sat December 4, 2021 7:59amReport post

I'm so so grateful for all the support and the space you all provide. I think my partner has been very lucky. His crimes were a little different to most I hear on here and although I love him dearly it will take me a long time to work out how I feel properly.

However, I'm really relieved and I can start rebuild our lives again after the horrendous in limbo waiting bit. I hope everyone waiting gets their resolutions soon. Sending love.