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Wish I hadn’t told anyone

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Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 7:43pmReport post

Having a bad day and I wish I hadn't told anyone about my situation. People are so judgmental and think I should cut partner out of our lives. He's our childrens dad and partner of a decade.
im feeling under pressure to choose friends or him. Life isn't going to be the same again and I feel so alone and depressed

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 7:54pmReport post

Jayjay

Only you can decide on what to do you have to let friends and family make there own decisions if they dont want to be there so be it my son has lost his friends as hard as it it me and his sister will be there all the way yes they did this but if we diddnt support then who.would they have xx

Sending love on this difficult journey xx

Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 7:58pmReport post

Thanks. I'm just as worried about the treatment me and children will get. I don't want to move away we had a good life before this

Carmela

Member since
November 2020

87 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 8:08pmReport post

It really is one of those situations that unless you have been through it yourself you can't really give opinion or advice as no one knows what they would actually do in the situation. If you had of asked me a few years ago I would of said "oh I would completely cut them off" but now in the situation it's not all Black and White and you can't stop loving someone like that. Also what my motto seems to be is He is a good person that's done a bad thing, not a bad person. Xxx

Annamarie

Member since
December 2021

74 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 9:22pmReport post

Hi.

Firstly I'm sorry that you are in this situation. I wish I had advice to offer but you are further along than me. We haven't told anyone except my mother in law but I am living in fear that people will find out. We too had a great life before all this, at least, I thought we did. I think I am going to have to move if it gets out, I don't think I could handle it.

I hope you find the strength to deal with it in a way that's best for you.

Sending hope.

Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 10:15pmReport post

That's good advice. It's just so bloody hard trying to carry on as normal and our children are friends and attend the same groups

Carmela

Member since
November 2020

87 posts

Posted Sun January 2, 2022 10:48pmReport post

I love that motto Lee



yes I have young children and a social circle but this whole experience has made me change my outlook so much, like lees motto goes...

xxx

Blackhound

Member since
October 2020

479 posts

Posted Mon January 3, 2022 11:30amReport post

Heya Jay Jay,

I can understand their point of view. I told my best friend who has been a best friend to both myself and my husband for a very long time.... She's been there when he's messed up a few times and what not...

Unfortunately after telling her I haven't anything from her, I've contacted her a few times but I have to respect that she needs time on whether she wants to remain friends or split .

It's each to their own. Luckily (if you can call it that) we have no children so life pretty much carries on as normal other than addressing the issues and instances that brought him to the dark place.

Theres so many people who get convicted wjh this type of offence and so please known you're not alone.

Blackhound

Member since
October 2020

479 posts

Posted Mon January 3, 2022 3:42pmReport post

I totally agree with the Lee, no one has the right to tell you how to live your life. Their opinions can obviously Influence what you do but at the end of the day it's your own decision... And I wholeheartedly agree whatever someone does in this circumstance, it's a big big decision that is very much life changing to make.