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Life after sentence

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Paris123

Member since
September 2021

5 posts

Posted Mon January 10, 2022 3:37pmReport post

Hi there everyone - I still find it helpful to visit this site and pick out bits of information/advice that helps.



I just wondered what/if anybody had any experience of life after prison sentence (it was 8 months)

To see somebody you care about so dearly, to be locked in to some kind of sad,robotic state...is just really sad and frustrating. It wasn't 8 months my dad received, its beginning to look like a life sentence!

How many times can you tell somebody you love that they've got to move on and put it behind them, the past is the past...so important to keep looking forward and not back?

When will it sink in ...and how do you restore self worth?

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2547 posts

Posted Mon January 10, 2022 5:45pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed January 12, 2022 4:35am

Melody

Member since
March 2020

26 posts

Posted Wed January 12, 2022 4:49amReport post

Honestly, I think the place to start is by talking about prison life. Empathy. "That must have been really hard for you". "I'd have struggled with xyz too" etc. When a trauma is taboo (men often struggle to talk about it), it can snowball and consume them. Talking brings it out in the open. Does he have a therapist?

My my ex (still close friends) came out of prison he was a scared exhausted wreck. We literally focused on the basics. Walking daily, as far as time allowed. Ensuring he had a good meal. As much contact with any supportive relatives as possible, whether that was phone, texts or walks. Believing that others believe you are worthy of time and love can have such an impact.

Then a focus on the future. Job hunting. Planning a trip to visit family. Anything to show that the way he was feeling at that moment in time was understandable, but wouldn't last forever.

He also got some new clothes. This helped give him a boost .

Anything small can really help! Even just making sure that he is having a shower and cleaning his teeth every day.

Supporting a loved one after prison is tough, but you will both get through this really tricky period xxxxxxx there is a brighter life on the other side!

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2547 posts

Posted Wed January 12, 2022 8:27amReport post

I do worry what my boy will face when he comes out of prison. He will be homeless - he can't return to live with us - and I can't be seen to be supporting him (family circumstances). So he really has to face life on his own. I pray he'll be strong enough.

i can easily go to pieces thinking about it but I try not to focus too far ahead it's no good for my mental health....

Edited Wed January 12, 2022 8:33am

Chelsea 1

Member since
June 2021

891 posts

Posted Wed January 12, 2022 7:55pmReport post

Hiya Melody.

How is your ex doing now with life in general and how's he getting on looking for work etc.

Hugs xx