Charges received in post today
Notifications OFF
It's been six months to the day since the knock and today in the post came the notification that he has been charged on two counts. First for intentionally communicating for purpose of sexual gratitude and of a sexual nature with someone who he did not reasonably believe to be over 16. Second intentionally causing someone who he believed to a 13 yr old to look at an image of someone engaging in sexual activity.
Court next month, he's pleading guilty as he'd already done so when interviewed initially without a solicitor.
I feel numb. I knew this day was coming and really great til that the charges relate to what he's told me he did, but honestly. I thought I'd have more time to prepare myself financially for the worst, and have more understanding of whether or not I'd support him beyond the court case.
I know the court case next month is just majestrates and then we'll have to wait again, but it's all now very real again.
Only a few people know. I've not told my family as I dont want them to have to deal with any of it. Especially if I continue to support him.
He was going to change his name, not sure if that's now possible as the charges have been raised in our married name.
just now have to wait for the solicitor to review and advise I guess.
Court next month, he's pleading guilty as he'd already done so when interviewed initially without a solicitor.
I feel numb. I knew this day was coming and really great til that the charges relate to what he's told me he did, but honestly. I thought I'd have more time to prepare myself financially for the worst, and have more understanding of whether or not I'd support him beyond the court case.
I know the court case next month is just majestrates and then we'll have to wait again, but it's all now very real again.
Only a few people know. I've not told my family as I dont want them to have to deal with any of it. Especially if I continue to support him.
He was going to change his name, not sure if that's now possible as the charges have been raised in our married name.
just now have to wait for the solicitor to review and advise I guess.
I'm sorry to hear that! Have a chat with a solicitor who knows what they're doing and request the evidence from the CPS. Even though he's already admitted guilt in interview there may still be something worth looking at? I hope it all goes as good as it possibly can in this situation. Big hugs xx
Big hugs Blackbird xx
Thanks x
Sending hugs Blackbird xx
Hi there, my ex partner (well ex so far taking it day by day but supporting him) he changed his name after charges he did it online got solicitor to sign deedpole and brought it to his second interview when he received charges. It might not help they might still read his old name out but it's worth a try. X
Thanks. I'll get him to speak with the solicitor. They'd said about changing his name so hopefully that can still be done. Especially as we live in a place where everyone knows everyone.
Is it easy to change your name? I think it's a thing my son will have to consider in the future......
My son changed his name on the morning of the second interview, once the solicitor received disclosure from the police. It's pretty straightforward xx
My husband has spoken with the solicitors this morning and they feel it's probably too late as the court will read out what's on the charge sheet which is in his name.
He didn't have a second interview and I'm all honesty we didn't expect anything to happen this quick as we were told 12-18 months and it's only been 6.
Oh well, guess like everything else in this I'll just have to deal with it if anything comes out from it all in our married name.
He didn't have a second interview and I'm all honesty we didn't expect anything to happen this quick as we were told 12-18 months and it's only been 6.
Oh well, guess like everything else in this I'll just have to deal with it if anything comes out from it all in our married name.
Hi blackbird.
thinking of you.
We are expecting these same charges for my husband too.
We have been told to expect to hear about the next steps in early 2022 - so any day now.
Keep strong. At least limbo is nearly over and you can move forward with whatever it will be.
thinking of you.
We are expecting these same charges for my husband too.
We have been told to expect to hear about the next steps in early 2022 - so any day now.
Keep strong. At least limbo is nearly over and you can move forward with whatever it will be.
Hi there, his charges were in old name, oic put it back to cos to change his name on charges so don't know if it's different were you're from. We are just trying everything we can to protect his and my children, least we can say we did everything we could. I'll be thinking about you we've plea hearing for second time in Feb so kinda in the same place as you x
Hi Blackbird
Just to say I am sorry like everyone else on here you are going through this. I do remember at the same time as yourselves today I was relieved to think we were closer to closure but were totally unprepared for what happened next. I was hoping we could keep the situation to the few family members who were aware of the knock and they would be the only people we would need to tell of the outcome. Very sadly this was not the case, the press were in court and took great delight in printing both the plea hearing at the magistrates court and crown court at sentencing. We thought all social media accounts had been deleted prior to the hearing but my OH had forgotten he had a linked in account where the press found a picture of him and his career history which happend to become high profile. We were devastated to see a full page article on both court occasions with the sentencing hearing being the worst write up. Please make sure prior to court that all social media accounts for both of you are deleted and the press cannot find anything that isn't spoken about in court, on the day of sentencing even the CPS did not disclose his career to protect him, we were very fortunate he had a very considerate and actually "kind" judge, he never lectured him or treated him disrespectfully. He did impose a suspended 12 month custodial and requirements to register on the SOR along with a SHPO however the SHPO restrictions were only about internet use and the SOR absolute basic restrictions for reporting time spent with a minor under 18, the judge had to apply a punitive order and had a choice of a massive hefty fine, going to prison or a curfew for 4 months, he ordered the curfew which we are now 2 months into and is due to finish in beginning of April. I am glad I actually told family prior to the hearing and before the evening print went out on the day of his first court appearnace I informed our neighbours so they didn't read about it in the press first, thankfully they were very supportive but some family have parted ways since the press article and chosed to believe that as opposed to the truth. I did not expect the one press guy to be outside the court in an attempt to photograph him but he had covered his face with a mask and scarf and wore a hat so he was unrecognisable, that is why they have hunted him down via social media. I do hope everything works out okay, it may be worth asking the solicitor to make sure none of your details are read out in court as well, you may have to provide a character reference and the solicitor may ask you for a few more to support your husbands character, again we kept it to just four references as I have also heard about a judge condemming someone who produce 20 references and decided nobody accounted for the victims in the case. There is stuff on here on what to write if asked but if you need any help as there is a template to what you can anc can't say in relation to the references that would support him in court. Also bear in mind anyone that does write a reference has to print and sign their name and full address but these details are for the judges eyes only and noone else other than your OH own solicitor.
Please contact me or anyone else on this site if you need any help
With love and best wishes to you both.
katie x
Just to say I am sorry like everyone else on here you are going through this. I do remember at the same time as yourselves today I was relieved to think we were closer to closure but were totally unprepared for what happened next. I was hoping we could keep the situation to the few family members who were aware of the knock and they would be the only people we would need to tell of the outcome. Very sadly this was not the case, the press were in court and took great delight in printing both the plea hearing at the magistrates court and crown court at sentencing. We thought all social media accounts had been deleted prior to the hearing but my OH had forgotten he had a linked in account where the press found a picture of him and his career history which happend to become high profile. We were devastated to see a full page article on both court occasions with the sentencing hearing being the worst write up. Please make sure prior to court that all social media accounts for both of you are deleted and the press cannot find anything that isn't spoken about in court, on the day of sentencing even the CPS did not disclose his career to protect him, we were very fortunate he had a very considerate and actually "kind" judge, he never lectured him or treated him disrespectfully. He did impose a suspended 12 month custodial and requirements to register on the SOR along with a SHPO however the SHPO restrictions were only about internet use and the SOR absolute basic restrictions for reporting time spent with a minor under 18, the judge had to apply a punitive order and had a choice of a massive hefty fine, going to prison or a curfew for 4 months, he ordered the curfew which we are now 2 months into and is due to finish in beginning of April. I am glad I actually told family prior to the hearing and before the evening print went out on the day of his first court appearnace I informed our neighbours so they didn't read about it in the press first, thankfully they were very supportive but some family have parted ways since the press article and chosed to believe that as opposed to the truth. I did not expect the one press guy to be outside the court in an attempt to photograph him but he had covered his face with a mask and scarf and wore a hat so he was unrecognisable, that is why they have hunted him down via social media. I do hope everything works out okay, it may be worth asking the solicitor to make sure none of your details are read out in court as well, you may have to provide a character reference and the solicitor may ask you for a few more to support your husbands character, again we kept it to just four references as I have also heard about a judge condemming someone who produce 20 references and decided nobody accounted for the victims in the case. There is stuff on here on what to write if asked but if you need any help as there is a template to what you can anc can't say in relation to the references that would support him in court. Also bear in mind anyone that does write a reference has to print and sign their name and full address but these details are for the judges eyes only and noone else other than your OH own solicitor.
Please contact me or anyone else on this site if you need any help
With love and best wishes to you both.
katie x
Thanks everyone for the support and advice definitely some things that I'd not thought of like my OH actually deleting his social media accounts. Whilst he doesn't use them they'll have photos etc. I've removed all my tags and married stays etc but will defo get him to delete.
just wish it would all go away but I know it won't
just wish it would all go away but I know it won't