Sharing evidence
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I've come to the point where I've realised I need to see the evidence against my partner. I hate the thought that I'd read something in the new and not know whether it was true or be able to talk openly with him about it.
He's always been reluctant to share it staying its so hard for him to even read (but also because I now understand I'd have found out the timeline or which he wasn't honest about).
I know think it's just a case of him being scared about my reaction and having to relive the conversations again the contents of which he finds distressing. But he understand why I need to and want to do it to help me.
Any ideas or suggestion on how to do this? Or how to deal with this?
He's always been reluctant to share it staying its so hard for him to even read (but also because I now understand I'd have found out the timeline or which he wasn't honest about).
I know think it's just a case of him being scared about my reaction and having to relive the conversations again the contents of which he finds distressing. But he understand why I need to and want to do it to help me.
Any ideas or suggestion on how to do this? Or how to deal with this?
Hi sal I'm. In the exact same situation, I've decided to read the chat he's giving me full disclosure plea hearing on 9th Feb so it will be soon. I'll tell you what I did, I wrote all my questions about the chat to him he wrote me a letter, I totally got his distress and I didn't want him to see mine either. So by doing this I'm fully aware (I hope) of what the content is, when and how it took place, and how long for. I'll post when I read the evidence myself, I believe yiu can call cos to get it sent across b4 plea hearing. Hope you're OK xx
Hello ladies,
We got the knock about 5 months ago and my partner has been rui. The police phoned me the other day to say that nothing has happened yet and it may be another month or so.
What I was wondering is can I ask the police what evidence they have against him and will I be able to view that, or do I have to wait until a court date? They took 2 phones from the house and nothing else.
Any help would be appreciated xx
We got the knock about 5 months ago and my partner has been rui. The police phoned me the other day to say that nothing has happened yet and it may be another month or so.
What I was wondering is can I ask the police what evidence they have against him and will I be able to view that, or do I have to wait until a court date? They took 2 phones from the house and nothing else.
Any help would be appreciated xx
When they arrested my ex partner they had to tjyst tell me what he did breifky (speaking secuslly to a teen decoy) because I have a teen daughter myself was the only reason I gut told, the cop told me this. I could see the Pitty in her eyes bless her. Anyway I'm not sure if police can tell you anything else, he has to give permission. X
Sorry my typos are terrible lol
My partner understands my need to see the evidence and how it will help me. He wants to do this for me, but he also thinks it's something he needs to do for himself.
When I asked him what was holding him back, he said he couldn't bare to see my face as I read the things he'd written.
I've suggested I could read it in a different room and or away from him. We seem to be able to communicate better through writing (I'm calmer and able to articulate myself better and he seems to be able to be more honest it he doesn't have to see the hurt in me) , so I've suggested I could ask the questions I feel I can over messages and to try and minimise the question I might feel I need to answer to his face.
When I asked him what was holding him back, he said he couldn't bare to see my face as I read the things he'd written.
I've suggested I could read it in a different room and or away from him. We seem to be able to communicate better through writing (I'm calmer and able to articulate myself better and he seems to be able to be more honest it he doesn't have to see the hurt in me) , so I've suggested I could ask the questions I feel I can over messages and to try and minimise the question I might feel I need to answer to his face.
I know it's very different with partners, but personally I wouldn't like to hear everything that my son has done, what I do know is enough to cope with to be honest.
Sal thats exactly what I've done, what ever works best for you both. Sometimes we text also we arnt living together so I read it at home then gu es me time to digest it then we discuss it.