Stop the world I want to get off
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So after 18 months of investigation my partner was charged on Monday with making images. My whole life is literally disintegrating around me. When the police came originally our children (adults) distanced themselves due to them having young children. Due to the length of time the investigation took they had slowly and safely moved a bit closer and we had a little (supervised) contact with them. This has stopped again (understandably). Yesterday my partner attempted to take his own life for the second time since this nightmare began and is currently in intensive care. I am struggling to breath and function like a normal human being. I'm terrified of making any decisions that might tip him over the edge, despite my daughter's reassurance that he's responsible for his actions. I care about this person but I don't know if what he tells me true. I feel as if I don't know what is real anymore. I wish I could just go to sleep and never wake up.
Headmashed, I feallt feel for you. 18 months is a long long time to have been goi through this already. It sounds like things had settled and now you have the new blow and that sounds like a real shock. Keep posting on here - I have found everyone to be really supportive and with genuine empathy though being in the same position.
I really feel for you, I cant imagine the strain your are under. Just take one day at a time, it's ok to still care for your partner and its ok to not know what to do for the best. Make sure you have lots of support through this very traumatic time. It's so very sad when someone gets to a point that suicide feels like the only way out.
Headsmashed
you are going to be okay. My husband has crisis team support. Level 4 he is seem by mental health professionals every two days. He has also had two suicide attempts and a safety plan in place.
I am so gutted for you that he is currently in hospital. I find that I cope is that these people are trained to support him survive. It’s his trauma it’s horrible but only he can want to survive.
i know with my husband he valued what he had so much that he is really struggling to deal with what he has done and lost.
me and my daughter loved him he had a nice life , I can’t make it better because it’s his pain and he has to heal that. I truly hope he survives and sees their is life after this situation.
looking after ourselves is hard we are also victims of their choices. The doctors will try to keep him safe.
i hope you have some words of comfort in this. you are not alone and neither his he the more society can accept these men need emotional support for their thoughts and actions it should become less stigmatising to talk things through xxx
all the best, one moment at a time, breathe and be kind to yourself xxx
you are going to be okay. My husband has crisis team support. Level 4 he is seem by mental health professionals every two days. He has also had two suicide attempts and a safety plan in place.
I am so gutted for you that he is currently in hospital. I find that I cope is that these people are trained to support him survive. It’s his trauma it’s horrible but only he can want to survive.
i know with my husband he valued what he had so much that he is really struggling to deal with what he has done and lost.
me and my daughter loved him he had a nice life , I can’t make it better because it’s his pain and he has to heal that. I truly hope he survives and sees their is life after this situation.
looking after ourselves is hard we are also victims of their choices. The doctors will try to keep him safe.
i hope you have some words of comfort in this. you are not alone and neither his he the more society can accept these men need emotional support for their thoughts and actions it should become less stigmatising to talk things through xxx
all the best, one moment at a time, breathe and be kind to yourself xxx
I do so feel for you. I know what it’s like to have adult children turn on you and grandchildren denied, all for the crime of supporting your partner. It will get better, so do hang in there and know that we are all here in this safe space. You don’t have to decide or name what you want to do next, but it is okay to make your own choices when you are ready, and if you want to stand by your partner that’s fine too. When things feel desperate do phone the helpline - they are so wise and supportive. Take care of yourself, and one day at a time.
I really have no idea where any paths are leading at the minute, the world seems like a dirty dark place to me. There are so many victims of these heinous crimes, first and foremost the poor children involved. Then there are us, the forgotten victims whose lives are smashed into countless pieces and swept aside to be forgotten. Then just when you can see some sense in the jumble of pieces that used to be your life it gets smashed again. I struggling to see any light at the end of the tunnel. My partner has just called me from his hospital bed and said I should get away from him and get on with my life. What life? Every hope and dream and plan we had for life lies broken in a police interview room somewhere. I don't even have a home in this country, we moved to France so I'm currently stuck on my daughter's sofa wondering where I'm going to live because if he's found guilty (and it looks as if most are) we are not going to be able to return there. I don't mean to sound as if I'm feeling sorry for myself but I'm struggling to find anything to cling onto.