Single mummy 3 and under
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Hi everyone
first of all I've been coming on here weekly just for some reassurance that I am not alone. I can honestly say it's helped so much. So thank you !
I am just wondering if anyone else is/has really struggled with shame? I feel so ashamed to be a single mummy ... I have absolutely no idea where this has come from and then I feel so guilty for feeling ashamed. I feel like it's breaking me and people can see straight through me. I have 3 year old twins and a 1 year old. It's been 7 months since the knock and I feel at breaking point.
I am having counseling and I am trying so hard to make myself stronger, it is so hard. I've never felt so many different emotions!
first of all I've been coming on here weekly just for some reassurance that I am not alone. I can honestly say it's helped so much. So thank you !
I am just wondering if anyone else is/has really struggled with shame? I feel so ashamed to be a single mummy ... I have absolutely no idea where this has come from and then I feel so guilty for feeling ashamed. I feel like it's breaking me and people can see straight through me. I have 3 year old twins and a 1 year old. It's been 7 months since the knock and I feel at breaking point.
I am having counseling and I am trying so hard to make myself stronger, it is so hard. I've never felt so many different emotions!
Hello....
You most certainly are not alone at all. You certainly have your hands full with 3. Iv got one and I feel like that's pushing me at times. This was never "part of the plan" any of us had for our future especially when there's little involved. For parts I feel like if it wasn't for them I don't know how I'd of coped...when I say coped I mean survived and that's simply because iv had to for them. But then at other times having them around is so hard when you just feel like I need a day to cry scream and admit defeat that this is really hard. So please do not feel you are alone at all. I don't think people can see through the act we put on infact people probably are thinking...superwoman! But it's our own anxiety which is the loudest we hear! I don't know your personal situation or circumstances but you are further ahead of me and so I am told it does get easier...it has too! But it is OK to admit that your disappointed and upset with how things have panned out. Things will get better and they will get easier.
Sending lots of love x
You most certainly are not alone at all. You certainly have your hands full with 3. Iv got one and I feel like that's pushing me at times. This was never "part of the plan" any of us had for our future especially when there's little involved. For parts I feel like if it wasn't for them I don't know how I'd of coped...when I say coped I mean survived and that's simply because iv had to for them. But then at other times having them around is so hard when you just feel like I need a day to cry scream and admit defeat that this is really hard. So please do not feel you are alone at all. I don't think people can see through the act we put on infact people probably are thinking...superwoman! But it's our own anxiety which is the loudest we hear! I don't know your personal situation or circumstances but you are further ahead of me and so I am told it does get easier...it has too! But it is OK to admit that your disappointed and upset with how things have panned out. Things will get better and they will get easier.
Sending lots of love x
Just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. I have a one year old and two teens (not his). I didn't feel ashamed of being a single mom with my older two because my previous relationship ended by choice and my plan was to model a healthy relationship for my children (all things that make me laugh or cry now). I wish there was a way to contact each other through this forum and not post publicly. Take any help offered or ask for help if it's not being offered. Sometimes people think we're coping. Love and hugs xx
I've felt that way too. I have 2 little ones and have had to process a lot around the idea of my family being 'broken' while trying to normalise the situation for them. I don't want them growing up thinking it's broken.
I bought a book called 'we are family' by Patricia Heggarty which helps to normalise different versions of what family means. Although I was upset when first buying it that there was no single parent with 2 kids, as if I needed to see my exact situation to feel included. My kids really like it as a book and hopefully its all positive messages that sink into their subconscious to broaden their sense of what is okay.
Someone else posted on here a while back about Brene Brown - search her YouTube about shame it's worth a listen xx
I bought a book called 'we are family' by Patricia Heggarty which helps to normalise different versions of what family means. Although I was upset when first buying it that there was no single parent with 2 kids, as if I needed to see my exact situation to feel included. My kids really like it as a book and hopefully its all positive messages that sink into their subconscious to broaden their sense of what is okay.
Someone else posted on here a while back about Brene Brown - search her YouTube about shame it's worth a listen xx