Living separately vs Divorce
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Bitter bean, I've actually thought this 5hrough a lot myself, I broke up with my partner originally, we have no children together but I have one late teen and two grown up sons so ss did call me but closed the case as he's not living here. I am supporting him as I know he's a good person who's made a terrible mistake and has lost everything due to it, we are working on our relationship a year down the line and are closer than ever, he has his own place and I have mine, I call to his by myself, stay over sometimes, we go out for dinner, walks, have had a few weekends away, plea hearing been put back twice already due to evidence not sent to solicitors as we are contesting one of the charges. I've no idea how it's gonna work out in the end after sentencing (communication charges) but I'm definitely living apart from him because I believe I'm safeguarding my child until she's 18, just t take it day by day, week by week, be honest always and don't put too much pressure on yourself about desicions for the future.
Lee,
that's helpful. I've seen visor teams mentioned a lot on here but I'm still. Not sure what it is. I'm a fairly private person and 2-6times a year sounds like 2-6 times too many! I really don't fancy having to deal with SS, but if we want to see our relatives who are children then it sounds inevitable. Currently supervised contact is his bail conditions.
Newlady, that's very interesting, sounds pretty much like the sort of arrangement I envisaged. It sounds like it's working reasonably well for you?
I just think he will fall apart if we split up. Although at times I feel like I've had enough of him.
that's helpful. I've seen visor teams mentioned a lot on here but I'm still. Not sure what it is. I'm a fairly private person and 2-6times a year sounds like 2-6 times too many! I really don't fancy having to deal with SS, but if we want to see our relatives who are children then it sounds inevitable. Currently supervised contact is his bail conditions.
Newlady, that's very interesting, sounds pretty much like the sort of arrangement I envisaged. It sounds like it's working reasonably well for you?
I just think he will fall apart if we split up. Although at times I feel like I've had enough of him.
Yes bitter bean it is , don't get me wrong I have days I want yo walk away, we arnt officially back together, we are keeping ing it very private and between us so it's just about us if that makes sense, as long as he's honest with me we might have a chance, he k ows one lie, even a small one I'll walk, but it's definitely working better between us than I thought it would, he's my best friend and always will be, I love him so much! But I'm keeping an open mind. Do whatever feels right in your gut if you realky really want it to work, you can do it as long as you're happy with leaving him behind for family occasions etc x
Thanks Newlady, you are right, best not to make plans too far ahead, as so much is unknown. A day or so ago I was ready to throw in the towel with him, but feeling slightly more benevolent towards him at the mo.
I'm finding it really hard to cope with my mood swings, this situation has made me feel really quite unstable - the mental equivalent of having the rug pulled out from underneath me. Nothing feels certain any more in my life, my feelings, my opinions, my personal relationships, and how I interact with others.
I'm finding it really hard to cope with my mood swings, this situation has made me feel really quite unstable - the mental equivalent of having the rug pulled out from underneath me. Nothing feels certain any more in my life, my feelings, my opinions, my personal relationships, and how I interact with others.
Totally understand that, I felt the sane, still do, like sometimes it all just hits me up the face suddenly, so I just tell him how I feel, he's takes it bless him bit I'm. On new medication which really helps, plus I've had counselling through my gp, I'm gonna have more once it gets to court because noone knows so if he gets jail time I'm left to deal with it all and I've no idea how I'm gonna feel. Just remember all those feelings are normal and put yourself first x
Newlady
Yeah normal feelings for an abnormal situation lol.
We just got to hang in here. The waiting is the worst. I feel like my life's on hold, or worse, just slipping away...
Yeah normal feelings for an abnormal situation lol.
We just got to hang in here. The waiting is the worst. I feel like my life's on hold, or worse, just slipping away...
I know, me too, through no fault of our own and our whole future in the hands of other people, it's so frustrating. Before this I had no idea how my life would turn out this year, terrible time for us all but one way or another you can get through this, give yourself a break you've come this far you're doing amazing x