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Just want to SCREAM

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Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Mon March 21, 2022 12:19pmReport post

I've just had enough of it all, all the waiting all the wondering what ifs all the mindf**ks this journey brings you. I just want to scream it's soo unfair on everyone who's part of this mess. Regardless if someone is guilty or not this whole thing should be dealt with swiftly not dragging on 3 years down the line, this is not fair not fair by any means.

No one can help no one can change this the powers that be will do thier own thing of what suits them regardless if whether that is morrally or legally right.

This whole situation stinks and I'm exhausted of being strong with the unknown.



Sorry I just needed a rant today!

Bitterbean

Member since
December 2021

635 posts

Posted Mon March 21, 2022 12:35pmReport post

Summer,

I haer you and totally agree. The whole system is supposed to be designed to protect children, but it sure isn't good for the mental health of everyone who is involved or drawn in.

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Mon March 21, 2022 3:26pmReport post

Hey Summer,

I agree, it's absolutely ridiculous. Has there not been any more updates? Xx

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Mon March 21, 2022 7:08pmReport post

I really, really feel for you. The warned list thing seems mental (on top of all the normal anxiety and uncertainty that come with these cases) and you've waited so long.

Really hope it's seen this week (I think I recall you saying it was up again).

Is there a limit as to how many times you can be on the warned list.

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Mon March 21, 2022 10:08pmReport post

Oh the saga continues Ofcourse it does as nothings ever simple but the long and short is it is meant to be this week, it's not the warned list SAL it's just the week and you will then be told the night before you will be heard the next day.

I feel soo full of anxiety I feel my heart pounding what will the outcome of this be what will the effect be on my children?

I have been here 4 times before and this feeling gets worse each time. There's nothing anyone can do I just need to keep going but it really needn't be this hard.. what did I ever do so bad just want to keep my family together and keep my children safe.



yes Lee we've been around along time now, I'd really be happy to be in retirement from the forum but you all keep me strong.

Edited Mon March 21, 2022 10:13pm

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Tue March 22, 2022 9:14amReport post

It's a disgrace, I really do sympathise with you and keep everything crossed that by the end of the week you will have good news to share and you can retire from here and put all this behind you. It can't go on forever! Sending love xx

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Tue March 22, 2022 11:13amReport post

Thanks Baffled You are right it can't go on forever! Doesn't feel like that when you are in it!

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Tue March 22, 2022 9:32pmReport post

All on for tomorrow will be glad when this part is over it really can't be ajourned again!

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Tue March 22, 2022 9:48pmReport post

Fingers crossed lovely! Xx

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 1:39pmReport post

What a relief to know its finally happening. Been thinking of you today.

Hope it's still gone ahead.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2401 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 3:26pmReport post

Hi Summer,

I hope today has been kind to you both and that you are ok xx

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 3:52pmReport post

It didn't go ahead again and different barrister again, think he was blunt and to the point of you walk into a trial with that charge of sexual communication the jury have already made thier mind up before they even know your name. Others have been realistic but have also been positive too.



Feeling deflated I think I know now the only way this will end and I don't know how I move on from this. Ofcourse he's not a bad person he did a stupid thing, not sure it warrants the punishment which will be given to him though.



Another date given for the summer, I don't know I'm going to hold it all together anymore.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2401 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 4:25pmReport post

Hi Summer

How awful it's just soul destroying I so feel for you, it's just such a broken system and you are the one that has to pick up the pieces

I can't offer any advise but just wanted to send you a huge virtual hug xxx

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 5:05pmReport post

Oh Summer I am sorry! The barrister sounds like he couldn't be bothered and had his own personal reservations. He does have a point about the jury and their perception but it's his job to argue against it and it only takes one or two members of that jury to listen and see sense. It's a never ending saga and I'm so sorry you're going through it. Sending love xx

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 5:38pmReport post

Summer, I'm so sorry to hear it hasn't gone ahead again. The system really does seem broken. It makes you wonder whether they do it so you give in and plead guilty.

I remember having really mixed feelings about my partner going to trial, even if he'd had strong evidence to support not guilty (which he didn't) the jury would judge him on what they did hear and not whether the specific crime had been committed. I felt frustrated there didn't seem to be any elements of grey and wondered whether his solicitor /barrister were being fair giving him any hope, but at the same time, that tiny part of me that thought maybe he'd be found not guilty, gave me hope. I felt a element of relief when he decided to plead guilty but a huge amount of sadness, because for us it means very likely custodial.

Do you know why the barrister keeps changing?

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Wed March 23, 2022 10:32pmReport post

No idea why the barrister keeps changing we just thought it's a case of who your given on the day due to legal aid although the last one said she would be here today.

He's feeling really low in mood can't really see a way forward I guess he always had that glimmer of hope that this may go away, this is not the case now and he's now having to wise up to that reality and what that will mean for him us and the children.

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Thu March 24, 2022 12:15pmReport post

That doesn't seem fair at all! Maybe it's happened for a reason? It seems odd how other barristers were more positive and this one wasn't. I would like to use the analogy that you can ask 3 consultants who have been in their jobs for years a question about treatment for an illness (which I have done before) and they give different opinions, I guess the same can happen when it comes to court cases. Perhaps next time you'll get a better barrister, a more open minded jury and hopefully it'll be the result you want. We're all powerless in this and all know the worst outcome might happen but with that being said sometimes things aren't always as bad as we expect. Big hugs xx