Family and Friends Forum

We are one week post sentencing now, he got a community order, 5 years SOR and 5 years SHPO. Only have 4 restrictions on the SHPO that are all internet and device based. The judge said my reference was very impressive. It was weird to hear the judge and his barrister say we can move on from this and be a family, the judge said to him in 5 years your life will be better-all we have heard so far from SS is how our lives are ruined.

Mid week it went in the paper and on Facebook, they just wrote what happened in court as there wasn't much of a story. They wrote about all the inaccessible images (but didn't say they were inaccessible) and that he had a supportive wife although luckily there wasn't a photo of him in the article. There was our street name but we haven't had any problems, we had both come off Facebook pre court so haven't seen the scale of it. My husband went into work early to tell his boss, we are so lucky as his boss was amazing and said 'don't do it again, focus in your famil, keep your head down and work' so he didn't loose his job- phew!

I did a couple of hurried calls to friends as I had told no one, they have been amazing and said they wished I'd told them sooner so they could've been there for us.
the only problems OH has had is some old work colleagues messaging him their awful opinions about it. Half of his charge was publishing extreme pornography which was on this group! So it's no loss, but his brother works with them so he's having a worse time of it.

it feels weird that this part is now over, I actually feel a bit chill about it being out there as well now. I guess people will either see it or they won't, talk to us or not, be our friends or not? So far no one close to us has said anything about it. It feels like I can almost breathe again, his visor and probation are both nice and he says he feels positive about working with them. Just have the challenge of SS now

thanks for all the help and support to get me here xx

We had 5 charges but the solicitor challenged the evidence and 2 got dropped. There was one charge for making iioc, this charge included 200, all accessible and inaccessible images across a-c. One charge for possession of extreme porn/beastiality and one charge for publishing extreme porn/beastiality.

I do feel much stronger today, maybe it's the sun? We even went out to the pub last night for a meal with his parents. I was very tempted to hide away but I can't do that for my baby

xx

Jay jay, I phoned my friend crying. Told her to just listen to me and had word vomit. Just told her everything. After telling her I took a measured response to telling people. Safer lives told us to write a narrative we want people to know, that briefly explains what has happened and focuses on what he has done since. So people don't believe the article or have their imaginations run wild. That is what we have done.

since the weekend some of my husbands friends have stopped speaking to him but others have reached out to me to give me support.
his boss had said he was happy for him to keep his job but others at work have refused to work with him. We have sent letters in for them to read to explain our story- then if they will work with him he can keep his job and if not he will be let go.

Yeah he only had a really small number of accessible images, I think it was 3 or 4. But lots of inaccessible-these were mentioned in court. The 'article' said this number without differentiating. But of course they write it in a way to get the hits and won't show the truth.



we have had a couple of people come forward who have had similar things happen in their families. I can't help but think of everyone knew how prevalent this was and actually spoke about it without a stigma a lot more could be done

They didn't want to read it, he's lost his job