9 months post knock
Notifications OFF
I am 9 months post the knock and having split with my husband. But yet people still keep telling me I am a bad wife for not sticking with him. He got a 9 month suspended sentance for 18 months, 10 year SHPO and 10 year on the register. It still doesn't feel enough. He is divorcing me for 50% of my house. His family is telling everyone his behaviour is due to me being a bad wife. I have no kids but carrying this burden alone and at my strengths end. Anyone got any advice on how to keep fighting and not just give in?
Hi Dazed keep your head held high, you are a victim and have done nothing wrong. Staying or leaving is a personal choice (I still haven't made my mind up) and nobody can judge you as they are not in your shoes! Does his family know what he's done and they are still trying to say you're in the wrong? Stay strong and proud you're a strong woman you got this ???????? X
Also May I ask what the charge was?
I stand with you 100%. You make the choices that you have to based on your own knowledge of the situation, of your relationship and your own morals.
If they choose to stand by him then that is their choice. But blaming you for his choices is appalling and naive and potentially damaging to his future as it provides excuses for his actions. If he doesn't take real responsibility and figure out real reasons then he is higher risk of repeating the offence.
You have been through enough without them piling all of that on you as well. Take a deep breath, trust your judgements, and eventually you will be seperated from all of them. Divorce is really hard. And when the reason stems from these kind of offences there is another layer of damage to process.
I hope you have people who you can talk to about all this who are not his family and therefore would have a more neutral view. And even some people who would blindly take your side in an argument because they are your people. I find it therapeutic sometimes to talk to friends who don't know much about what's going on but will happily insult him just because he hurt me.
Try not to let them get into your head. Stand your ground, whatever that means to you.
Regarding the house make sure you speak to lawyer and look at your options xx
If they choose to stand by him then that is their choice. But blaming you for his choices is appalling and naive and potentially damaging to his future as it provides excuses for his actions. If he doesn't take real responsibility and figure out real reasons then he is higher risk of repeating the offence.
You have been through enough without them piling all of that on you as well. Take a deep breath, trust your judgements, and eventually you will be seperated from all of them. Divorce is really hard. And when the reason stems from these kind of offences there is another layer of damage to process.
I hope you have people who you can talk to about all this who are not his family and therefore would have a more neutral view. And even some people who would blindly take your side in an argument because they are your people. I find it therapeutic sometimes to talk to friends who don't know much about what's going on but will happily insult him just because he hurt me.
Try not to let them get into your head. Stand your ground, whatever that means to you.
Regarding the house make sure you speak to lawyer and look at your options xx