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Tracking apps

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ACompleteMess

Member since
February 2022

57 posts

Posted Sun May 1, 2022 1:47pmReport post

My partner has recently started using 'Accountable2You' an app that tracks every app or search he makes on his phone, it's more so for my sake because I feel like in order to trust again I need to keep an eye on things for a while.



however, the app seems a bit 'glitchy'? It doesn't always track everything and times and usage time are usually completely incorrect. Does anyone know any apps that do a similar thing that are available on iOS?

ACompleteMess

Member since
February 2022

57 posts

Posted Sun May 1, 2022 3:06pmReport post

Hi Lee,



Thank you, I will definitely tell him to give them a message and hopefully get it all sorted :)

Distressed and pregnant

Member since
November 2020

1000 posts

Posted Mon May 2, 2022 4:16pmReport post

Can I ask if anyone else has this please? I've had a look at it and while it seems like a good idea I'm struggling with it putting more responsibility on non offending partners or family members and it also feels alien because I can't shake my feelings of checking partners phone is a sign of insecurity and could be viewed as controlling. I understand the reasons behind it and obviously (I hope it's obvious) I'm not saying that anyone who uses them are insecure or controlling, just wondered how you overcome these feelings?

Chelsea 1

Member since
June 2021

891 posts

Posted Mon May 2, 2022 8:40pmReport post

As soon as hubby got the knock I took his smartphone off him. Factory settings then sold it.

Now he has a old phone no internet.

Xx

ACompleteMess

Member since
February 2022

57 posts

Posted Mon May 2, 2022 9:04pmReport post

Hi distressed, when my partner was initially arrested and got a new phone I didn't feel the need for the app, I felt I could trust him enough as he'd given me all his devise passwords and logins so I didn't see a need for it. However a few days ago I found out that my partner wasn't coping as well with things as I thought, he'd been hiding his actual emotions and bottling it up, his mental health had gotten really bad, which is scary for me as he never suffered before his arrest. He ended up not showing up for work for multiple days but I was none the wiser as he was actually getting up for "work" and leaving at his normal time, I didn't know he wasn't actually going, it all came out because he received a letter from his work basically threatening to fire him if he didn't provide a reason for him not showing up, he's now gone to the doctors about his depression. That's the reason I started using the app, mainly to track where he is and make sure he's going to work. But I also found out that he'd been googling suicide methods and that scared the absolute crap out of me so this is just a way to keep an eye on him and his mental health, not because I'm scared of him reoffending.

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Mon May 2, 2022 10:21pmReport post

If you are finding that some of the apps appear to be in use for a long time, it's possible because it's running in the background, things like emails etc

NMS

Member since
November 2021

97 posts

Posted Mon May 2, 2022 10:25pmReport post

We have ever accountable, seems a little glitchy at times but does give me a little peace of mind being able to see what he had been up to.

I know I can't track him forever though and some day will need to let go, just not yet.

Distressed and pregnant

Member since
November 2020

1000 posts

Posted Tue May 3, 2022 8:39amReport post

Thanks. We're going to discuss it. I have his passwords already but I haven't checked any of his stuff yet and we only see each other once a week so I don't want to get into a cycle of checking every week. I trust him majority of the time, have a couple of days a month (hormone related) where I become massively insecure. I should add that I trust him not to reoffend at the moment, I'm not fully there with trusting him not to talk to other women or not watching porn (he hasn't done either since arrest, to the best of my knowledge)