Family and Friends Forum

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2550 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 7:31pmReport post

Had a lovely afternoon with the family. I came away glad of normality but a sad cloud hanging over me. What has my son done to his life, I so wish it was back to how life was.

I hear the door open as he comes back from work, first words after kicking off his shoes "what's for tea mum", I hear him giggling at some cheesy programme or cheering at a game he's playing on, we use to send each other silly photos. The house stands quiet now.... I stand in his room and talk to him..... he's not there....

This journey is the pitts at times isn't it? Being brave doesn't always work!

Edited Wed May 11, 2022 7:38pm

Hopeforthefuture

Member since
September 2021

97 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 7:46pmReport post

Smile,

My heart breaks for you, I can't imagine how hard being away from your boy must be. Sending hugs xxx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2402 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 7:58pmReport post

Evening Smile

I feel your pain and I know exactly how you feel just wanted to send a huge fluffy hug that engulfs you with love and to know I am here for you xx

Polly Pocket

Member since
May 2022

440 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 8:29pmReport post

Oh Smile. My heart is broken. X

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2550 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 9:09pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Thu May 12, 2022 5:16pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2402 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 10:41pmReport post

Hi Smile

I lost my dear brother to suicide over 20 years ago he was the same age as my son now 28 and it still hurts dreadfully so I am like you just grateful that our sons are still here x

A mothers love will never change and we will have time with them outside of the walls one day x

You are incredibly strong and it is clear how much strength you give to your son just been there at the end of the phone for him is priceless xx

Livuk1963

Member since
April 2022

30 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 10:51pmReport post

Hi Smile

I too feel your pain of a son who is on remand and how we put that brave face on to others and try to get through the day I talk to him as if he was in my house and wait for his calls daily -

my love and thoughts are with all of you who like me miss that person we love through this nightmare xxxx

Katie28

Member since
December 2021

183 posts

Posted Wed May 11, 2022 11:22pmReport post

Dear Smile,

I feel so so sorry and sad for you, this has to be heartbreaking, hold onto to those lovely memories, you will make more happy memories in the future with your son. Lots of love to you. Xxx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2550 posts

Posted Thu May 12, 2022 4:29amReport post

Another day.
It is just so nice to air thoughts I try to hide but shed a tear when I'm on my own........ it can be an incredible lonely journey at times. Thankyou x

Edited Thu May 12, 2022 4:29am

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Thu May 12, 2022 9:09amReport post

Smile,

My heart goes out to you, I wish I could wave a magic wand and undo everything for you. Have you got any pets? I know it's not the same and doesn't fix anything but my cat really got me through some dark times in my life (as sad and clichéd as that sounds) just having something to get up for and look after meant I didn't get to opt out, even now I have to be strong for him because he has a few health issues and specialist care so he makes me feel needed. Just a thought, plus kittens and puppies are so cute :) x

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2402 posts

Posted Thu May 12, 2022 10:16amReport post

Smile

You are definitely not alone we are all here to pick you up when your down, to send strength to you and to your son and most importantly send fluffy virtual hugs xxx

Lola53

Member since
May 2021

269 posts

Posted Thu May 12, 2022 10:38amReport post

Sending you a huge hug and positive vibes, Smile - you're so strong but you're allowed to have a wobble. Embrace it briefly, have a cry, then dust yourself off and get out in the sun and a green space if you can.

I'm with you, Baffled, animals are fantastic - I have a horse and he quite literally saved my life last year when my world fell apart; the routine and the fact that he needed me.

Hugs to all xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2550 posts

Posted Thu May 12, 2022 5:15pmReport post

Not sure about a pet but I do loose myself in my gardening. Your right ladies you have to let go of these sad episodes and then get back up to face life.

you lot are lovely xxxxxxx