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COMMUNICATION

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Bettyboo65

Member since
June 2022

339 posts

Posted Tue June 7, 2022 11:49amReport post

Hi, does anyone have information regarding commucation with minor, done when going through very traumatic times and has no tendencies whatsoever before or after to do this. Also how do we do character references to help? what do we include?

Thanks in advance.

Bettyboo65

Member since
June 2022

339 posts

Posted Tue June 7, 2022 2:01pmReport post

Hi not sure if decoy or not, still RUI (7 months in), he's finding it difficult to function most days and dark thoughts - really struggling and dread what could be coming

Bettyboo65

Member since
June 2022

339 posts

Posted Tue June 7, 2022 9:19pmReport post

Hi, yes he has done some modules and is in therapy, has been for around 12 weeks or so. He says he has no attraction to minors and did it whilst not in the right place mentally, has had a lot of major traumas in life since around 2017. Also childhood trauma which I wasn't aware of before now :(

Edited Tue June 7, 2022 9:30pm

Pregnantandscared

Member since
April 2021

140 posts

Posted Wed June 8, 2022 12:05amReport post

Hi, my partner was convicted for communication offences - knock ag end of March 2021 and sentenced at end of April 2022. We had seven charges and got 18 months suspended sentence.



Lee is right, best thing he can do is focus on himself and exploring why he did it and getting better coping behaviours. Whether he does the course through Stop It Now/LFF or through therapy via StopSO or other courses (we are NW based so he did the Safer Lives course) it's important he takes the opportunity and the time to look at the how and the why it ended up here.



we didn't do the LFF course but did the others and therapy from the week of the arrest until sentencing (he's still in therapy now) and the judge even commented that there was nothing more my partner could have done to show this is a one off and that he's learnt.



hold your head high, this is a huge journey but you can get through it.

Bettyboo65

Member since
June 2022

339 posts

Posted Wed June 8, 2022 4:23pmReport post

Thanks for replying, he is exploring coping mechanisms, especially for the dark thoughts and I'm so glad of this as he has been really bad in his thinking, ie the future for him and the shame and guilt. He doesn't have an attraction to minors and is now confronting his past and the childhood trauma which he hasn't ever spoken of except to the counsellor. Not sure going forward how things will be but taking each day at a time. He is a good person and has taken the wrong path due to not resolving issues from his childhood and not escaping the torment in his head/heart. He did what he did and we are dealing with it but how I wish life was normal again as it seemingly was before the knock. Life would be amazing if this wasn't hanging over us.