first advice
Notifications OFF
Hi,
I feel so angry, scared, anxious and disappointed. Any advice would be really appreciated.
I found iioc on my bfs computer and reported him to the police. He is so sorry and upset at what he has done. I'm finding it really hard to even believe and process- I'm still waiting to wake up from this nightmare situation.
I know I can't even tell my parents or friends about this, but I feel so awful. Part of me wants to run away but the other half knows that I love him and that he needs help with addiction and can get through this. The fear of going to court or even prison and everybody finding out is the worst. What should I do?
I feel so angry, scared, anxious and disappointed. Any advice would be really appreciated.
I found iioc on my bfs computer and reported him to the police. He is so sorry and upset at what he has done. I'm finding it really hard to even believe and process- I'm still waiting to wake up from this nightmare situation.
I know I can't even tell my parents or friends about this, but I feel so awful. Part of me wants to run away but the other half knows that I love him and that he needs help with addiction and can get through this. The fear of going to court or even prison and everybody finding out is the worst. What should I do?
Morning Sunflower
So sorry that you find yourself here, but well done for making contact. I know it's not an easy step to make, I'm still fairly new to this too.
I know it doesn't feel it right now but you have absolutely done the right thing in reporting your partner. Unfortunately we have found our loved ones go down a rabbit hole so deep that it's so difficult for us to comprehend and for them to even explain.
It is good that he has acknowledged that he needs help. Definitely ring the LFF helpline, they are there for both of you and can give much valued advice.
What I would say is take a deep breath and just concentrate on getting through each day at a time at first.
Don't go making any big decisions either, things can be parked for another day.
You will get so much support from people on here.
Sending you a big hug x
So sorry that you find yourself here, but well done for making contact. I know it's not an easy step to make, I'm still fairly new to this too.
I know it doesn't feel it right now but you have absolutely done the right thing in reporting your partner. Unfortunately we have found our loved ones go down a rabbit hole so deep that it's so difficult for us to comprehend and for them to even explain.
It is good that he has acknowledged that he needs help. Definitely ring the LFF helpline, they are there for both of you and can give much valued advice.
What I would say is take a deep breath and just concentrate on getting through each day at a time at first.
Don't go making any big decisions either, things can be parked for another day.
You will get so much support from people on here.
Sending you a big hug x
Hey Sunflower,
It was very brave of you to report and you've done the right thing! In regards to staying or leaving, there's nobody who can give the answer unfortunately, it's very much down to how you feel, the quality of your relationship and whether there will be genuine effort from your partner to work on the issues which led him down this path. The investigstion, charging and sentencing part of this journey often takes a long time, some people are 2/3 years+ so don't worry too much about that as it will give you the chance to learn more and decide what you want to do beforehand. Was there a lot of stuff on there and is this something that has been going on a while? Xx
It was very brave of you to report and you've done the right thing! In regards to staying or leaving, there's nobody who can give the answer unfortunately, it's very much down to how you feel, the quality of your relationship and whether there will be genuine effort from your partner to work on the issues which led him down this path. The investigstion, charging and sentencing part of this journey often takes a long time, some people are 2/3 years+ so don't worry too much about that as it will give you the chance to learn more and decide what you want to do beforehand. Was there a lot of stuff on there and is this something that has been going on a while? Xx
Hi Sunflower
Just wondering how you are doing.
Hope you have been able to speak to someone whether it be LFF or a friend.
I found the first couple of weeks really difficult, it feels surreal at times but as the weeks go by you do get some better moments.
Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and that you are not alone.
Just wondering how you are doing.
Hope you have been able to speak to someone whether it be LFF or a friend.
I found the first couple of weeks really difficult, it feels surreal at times but as the weeks go by you do get some better moments.
Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and that you are not alone.
Post deleted by user
Post deleted by user
Hi Sunfllower
I so wish I was in a position to offer you some advise but I too am here a a reluctant newbie so I really do feel your pain and anxiety. I think we need to hold on to th advise of others who say that with time it gets a bit easier and the feelings of disbelief, sickness and anxiety fade a bit. You did the right thing and I wish for you to have strength Hope to see this through. I think we've found a very supportive group xxx
I so wish I was in a position to offer you some advise but I too am here a a reluctant newbie so I really do feel your pain and anxiety. I think we need to hold on to th advise of others who say that with time it gets a bit easier and the feelings of disbelief, sickness and anxiety fade a bit. You did the right thing and I wish for you to have strength Hope to see this through. I think we've found a very supportive group xxx