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The knock on the door.

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The cat lady

Member since
June 2022

5 posts

Posted Tue June 28, 2022 12:05pmReport post

My husband of 23 years got the knock last week, to say I'm in shock is an understatement. I can't function right and don't know who to talk to. My teenage son was in the house when they came it's blew our world apart. I can't even look at my husband let alone talk to him.They took his phone and computer he admitted he'd done it straight away. But I cant even start to think about what he's done or been doing. I just feel numb.

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Tue June 28, 2022 6:54pmReport post

Post deleted


Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am

G3mini

Member since
July 2022

16 posts

Posted Sat July 2, 2022 7:40pmReport post

Hello.

Having been in this exact situation, I truly know how it feels to have your world fall down around you.

It may seem strange to say but the fact that your husband admitted his guilt straight away is a good sign. Hopefully with the realisation what he did was so very wrong, he will be open to seeking help.

I echo the suggestion not to do anything until you have calmed down. This may take weeks but with all your emotions running riot, making lifechanging decisions would not be right.

You, your husband and your son would benefit from the Inform and Inform Plus courses that the Foundation runs. Information is on the website and in the meantime you can ring the Stop It Now helpline. It's annonymous and a safe space. Call as much as you need. Post on here as much as you need.

If your husband is convicted, it will be life changing but (from direct experience) it is possible to rebuild your life - with or without him.

Sending you strength.

G3mini

Newlady

Member since
April 2021

644 posts

Posted Mon July 4, 2022 1:27pmReport post

Hi, welcome to our club, it's nit a club anyone wants to be in but we are all here for you. From experience, the first few weeks are horrendous but I'll give you some advice. Don't make any major decisions, it will all take a while to sink and and gear the whole truth. I know he confessed all to yiu, which is a good thing, he's admitting his problem and can get help. I really hope he didn't add it to police, they twist everything and are onky after a conviction, they are not your friend, tell them nothing unless a solicitor present. Tell onky people yiu tryst and as little people as possible because once it's out there there's no turning back and people will judge unfortunately. Get some help for you and your son via gp or stop it help. Line. Your hubby too i found counselling helped. You have to remember he's still the person you live, vhes just did a bad thing and made a huge mistake. You will move on from this weather it's with or without him, it might not seem. Like it now but it died s get easier zzz