Resentment
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THIS IS A MASSIVE RANT!
Sorry, but you ladies are the only people who will understand.
I have the SW coming today. I HATE IT! The one thing I know that I can say about myself is that I am a good mum. My kids are happy, loved, listed too, cared for and are number one priority in every decision I make in life. Yet because of my husbands selfish stupidity and disgusting behaviour I have to prove to a random woman all of the above. I am currently cleaning floors and scubbing bathrooms to prove that I'm some kind of Mrs Hinch wannabe. My husband is just having another normal day at work, getting on with life.
I am so full of resentment for my husband and SS, I can taste it. The range today is real. The sadness has gone and been replaces with fire!!!
Sorry, but you ladies are the only people who will understand.
I have the SW coming today. I HATE IT! The one thing I know that I can say about myself is that I am a good mum. My kids are happy, loved, listed too, cared for and are number one priority in every decision I make in life. Yet because of my husbands selfish stupidity and disgusting behaviour I have to prove to a random woman all of the above. I am currently cleaning floors and scubbing bathrooms to prove that I'm some kind of Mrs Hinch wannabe. My husband is just having another normal day at work, getting on with life.
I am so full of resentment for my husband and SS, I can taste it. The range today is real. The sadness has gone and been replaces with fire!!!
I was the same I cleand with so much bleach scrubbed skirting boards so bad I got blisters and bad back and when SS come didn't even look at the house just said I'm hear to tell you case closed but I think it because we've split and he only have suppervised visits via his step mum I think it just the anxiety of thinking they will take the children but like SS said they here to make sure everything is ok and they not taking children and even if they was and then they repeated it and said they would let you know what to change and even then there is a lot they would haft to go through if that was to happen but the pressure us partner's/ mums go through for the sake of there mistakes are awful
Hope all goes well for you hugs x
Hope all goes well for you hugs x
Thanks Dee, we're along way from case closed. We've been putvon a child protection plan. Probably because I refused to NOT support my husband and because he sounded like an absolute idiot in our ICPC, through himself a little pity party infant of everyone.
Confused and worried
I completely understand your rage and resentment at your husband and I'm sure I would feel just the same as you about SW involvement. I hope the visit goes well and that your SW is a reasonable person (there must be some, surely?)
I completely understand your rage and resentment at your husband and I'm sure I would feel just the same as you about SW involvement. I hope the visit goes well and that your SW is a reasonable person (there must be some, surely?)
Lee I'm sure you are absolutely right in how to behave with SW, but it really bugs me that we have to bottle up our feelings and not be ourselves in order to give the right impression to the various authorities involved. Sorry, had to get that off my chest! :) maybe we should have a new section in this forum where people can have a good old rant about what they would *really* like to say to the various unhelpful people we come across on the outside! Just joking, of course.
I am supporting him. That's the problem. I have told them that I want our family to survive this. I have told them that I see it as a mental health issue because of his drug addiction.
I asked if things would be different if I left him and all I got in response was a knowing smile.
I asked if things would be different if I left him and all I got in response was a knowing smile.
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I had my my meeting. I actually seem to get on quite well with my SW, she's very open minded and understands why I see this as a mental health issue, even said herself that she thinks there should be places that men can go to get help for their thoughts before acting upon them.
Now the kicker..... she's pregnant and goes an maternity leave in Oct!!!!
We also discussed that I felt decision had been made prior to the ICPC and that the chair (who we're stuck with) didn't listen to our perspective. My SW confessed that the 2 of them often clashed and had differing views on things. She said that this chair is particularly tough and while we had her it would be unlikely that my OH would be able to come home.
Has anyone looked to get their chairperson changed?
Now the kicker..... she's pregnant and goes an maternity leave in Oct!!!!
We also discussed that I felt decision had been made prior to the ICPC and that the chair (who we're stuck with) didn't listen to our perspective. My SW confessed that the 2 of them often clashed and had differing views on things. She said that this chair is particularly tough and while we had her it would be unlikely that my OH would be able to come home.
Has anyone looked to get their chairperson changed?
Good point daffodil! My SW wrote things in the assessment that I hadn't said and she hadn't taken any notes during visit, so I said she had written them retrospectively and she obviously hadn't remembered what I said exactly as what she wrote wasn't true! Even ages I'd mentioned weren't true x