Family and Friends Forum

3 years on, maybe some positive to give hope

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D1286

Member since
November 2019

62 posts

Posted Wed August 17, 2022 10:15pmReport post

Hi everyone

Bit of a long one but keep reading.

Not posted on here for a couple of years but just watched a TV show and it brought everything back. I came on here to give people some home.

The offence was images of children.

So we got the knock September 2018. The police came and knocked on the door at 6.30am to arrest my husband who wasn't in at the time. He was at work. They seized every technology device in the property. They also went to my husband at work and arrested him them infront of all his colleagues. He went to the station and was released on bail under investigation at lunch time that day.

I was totally in bits my ocd and depression went into over drive and I lost 2 stone in the first month. My husband came home and we talked and talked for hours.

We decided to stay together and I decided to support him to get help. We went to the doctors for counselling and they refused as he was still under investigation.

He had a second interview mid 2019, and was charged. We needed to get legal aid to go to court etc and in March 2020 just before the first lock down he was given a 12month suspended sentence, 12 month probation and a court order. There wasn't any media coverage because of covid so we were lucky.

I needed so much in the first few days and if it wasn't for the forum and the wonderful people on here I certainly wouldn't be here for definitely. Lucy faith was really good too.

Thinking back, I was like many thinking how the f**k do I get through what the hell do I do, but looking back now I finally got through the shit.

Myself and my husband are both getting counselling now and working through with couples therapy. You can get through and if you need help ask for it. There is certainly some really nice people on here. We are still together and living a reasonable normal life.

I hope this has given some positive outcome to help people get through.

Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Thu August 18, 2022 11:10pmReport post

Thanks for the positivity.
can I ask what boundaries you have come across ? I'm struggling with thoughts of family parties, disclosing to people and children wanting their friends round. I've not decided whether to stay or leave bcos of these issues x

D1286

Member since
November 2019

62 posts

Posted Fri August 19, 2022 11:57amReport post

We don't go to family parties anymore or the big/wider family weekend away so we avoid having to tell people. We make up more excuses like can't get time off for it. We don't have children but we were told by the police the social service would be involved.