Feeling alone
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Hi everyone I can't stop thinking today, in just over a week im going to court ( I decided to go, I wasn't sure I would) and hopefully will hear how long my boyfriend will be getting inside, I know he will be staying in there as he is there right now, I just don't know how long for. Im so scared that it's going to be a long time. I don't know how I will cope, it's quite lonely in the evenings and I can't call him he can only call me.
I have made the decision to stay in this relationship even after a lot of thinking about the future and the problems we will have with having kids and everything. I just don't know what the longest time I can wait for him to come out is.... I love him but if it's a long time I don't know how im going to do it. I have a visit coming up but I'm so nervous for it. Sometimes I wish I would just leave and I hate myself for not leaving, but other days I think about how much I love him and I want to stay. It's so stressful :(
I have made the decision to stay in this relationship even after a lot of thinking about the future and the problems we will have with having kids and everything. I just don't know what the longest time I can wait for him to come out is.... I love him but if it's a long time I don't know how im going to do it. I have a visit coming up but I'm so nervous for it. Sometimes I wish I would just leave and I hate myself for not leaving, but other days I think about how much I love him and I want to stay. It's so stressful :(
I'll the wait is horrible as is the unknown. You are nearly there though in knowing the outcome and that may help you decide how to approach the situation. Even with the best intentions, you do not really know how you will feel next week, next month or next year. My person is in prison and I try hard to not make and promises or put any pressure on myself to do so. We are in contact as boyfriend and girlfriend but he knows I can't 100% commit until closer to release. I have said though that I will make that commitment, if I feel I can before he is released - I hope I can, I want to be therefore him, but that is still over 15 months away and I can't know how I'll feel then.
At the moment try to concentrate one week at a time.
At the moment try to concentrate one week at a time.