Family and Friends Forum

Addictions lead to this

Notifications OFF

Josephinarina

Member since
October 2022

4 posts

Posted Fri October 21, 2022 6:47pmReport post

I don't really know where to start, my boyfriend has struggle for most of his adult life with drink & drug addictions. He's had a lot of trauma in his life and this seems to be his coping mechanism. He was arrested 3 years go and later convicted for viewing images but has no recollection of it as was off his head at the time. The arrest lead to sober life which was great and we started to move on & put it behind us. However, the last 9 months have been on off hell with his addictions, he's trying counselling & AA but it keeps creeping back in. Today he was arrested again for the same thing. Presumably from a night on a bender. I just don't know what to do.
he never admitted the 1st time, it was out down to his work phone being shared by 3 people and never locked but this now proves it was him as the phone has only been used by him. Am I a fool to still want to make it all work in the future?



he's on a suspended sentence so I assume he'll go straight to prison now or does he have to get found guilty of this one to trigger the suspended bit?

Edited Mon October 24, 2022 9:29am

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Mon October 24, 2022 10:47amReport post

Hi

My OH was arrested in June, when arrested he confessed to an addiction to cocaine. He acknowledged his offending but says it only happened while under the influence. He was in chat rooms relating to adult sex and photos were shared, he claimed to have never sought them out. He went to his first NA meeting the night of the arrest and has been clean for 120 days. He is also seeing a therapist from Stop SO.

I have done some research and found that cocaine is linked to "risky sexual behaviour".

I recognise addiction as a life long process, even though he is not using at the moment, he is still an addict. I am hoping to support him and know that part of that support may be dealing with relapse. While I am currently seeing things through rose coloured glasses, I hope that I can will be able to support him through any relapse. However, we have children and I will not allow his addiction to negatively impact them. At the moment I have managed to protect them from too much fall out from his arrest and addiction, but it is a continuous battle.

Josephinarina

Member since
October 2022

4 posts

Posted Mon October 24, 2022 3:59pmReport post

Thanks so much for your reply, it's nice to know this is not a unique situation. My partner has been honest and said he has no interest in porn until he drinks & does cocaine then he doesn't even know he's doing it!
this time he looked at legal porn but there was an illegal pop up. It's being investigated as to whether he looked at it.

he's going back to AA tonight as is so shocked and ashamed with himself seems more determined than ever to shake off his addiction. He's going to see a counsellor so I'll look up the group you've said. Thabks