Contacting the newspaper
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Guys is is worth me contacting the local newspaper that reported it online on there page or will this make them bump it up or do another story ? :(
I have no idea, but I've seen others say it's not a good idea as it's like poking the hornets nest, it could make it worse.
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with this. Neither of my parents are alive so I haven't had the problem of sharing with parents but I have told one of my closest relatives and a few close friends. I do worry the more people i tell, the more it will come back to bite me but I haven't done anything wrong and everyone has been really supportive. I'm dreading it being in the paper though and it being widely known. Fortunately his name is fairly common and they're using his address at the moment, not home address. But if they use a photo it'll be hard to deny so I think I'll go with yes, it's my husband, he did something stupid to cope with stress. But that might be easier for me to do as we're probably not going to get back together and he won't be coming home anytime soon.
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with this. Neither of my parents are alive so I haven't had the problem of sharing with parents but I have told one of my closest relatives and a few close friends. I do worry the more people i tell, the more it will come back to bite me but I haven't done anything wrong and everyone has been really supportive. I'm dreading it being in the paper though and it being widely known. Fortunately his name is fairly common and they're using his address at the moment, not home address. But if they use a photo it'll be hard to deny so I think I'll go with yes, it's my husband, he did something stupid to cope with stress. But that might be easier for me to do as we're probably not going to get back together and he won't be coming home anytime soon.
I honestly can't cope can't sleep it's worse than the actual shock of the crime . Waiting to see if my parents see or hear it first from friends or naybours how can I possibly live like this :( sorry I'm rammelbing I don't know what to do . I'm scared to call the reported I don't want him making things worse but what if they could take it off xx
Realistically I think the newspaper is not like to do anything. They are unlikely to promote it further immediately. And unlikely to take it down unless they'd done something to break their code of conduct.
I have read on here that people wity children have had more success in some elements being removed, but not the whole story.
My fear is that if I contacted them now, they'd include him in a yearly round up of offenders.
You are experiencing some very intense emotions right now and they will lessen with time (hard to believe, but they will). If they don't though, I wonder if it would be less stressful for you to tell a select few people.
I have read on here that people wity children have had more success in some elements being removed, but not the whole story.
My fear is that if I contacted them now, they'd include him in a yearly round up of offenders.
You are experiencing some very intense emotions right now and they will lessen with time (hard to believe, but they will). If they don't though, I wonder if it would be less stressful for you to tell a select few people.
The police contacted the paper that originally ran the story and it was removed from their website and Facebook page. I've never been told why they did this. It was picked up by other papers and I contacted two of them as the story essentially identified our daughter and that goes against their code of conduct. They were very understanding and removed it. It was shared by a vigilante group and I've not contacted them out of fear. It's also on another two papers when I've googled him recently but in all honesty I don't have it in me to contact them. Once his time on the sor is up he intends to do a right to be forgotten request to Google. If they have printed your address you could contact them and ask them to remove it to safeguard you and your children. Just be aware that other papers may have picked it up and not have put it on yet or it may not be as high up on a Google search xxx
I don't how to cope when I don't know who knows ect . In a way it's worse that everyone knowing straight away . Least then it's out. One week a work friend could no the next a neighbor ect it will be never ending for the rest of my life xx
Xxx,
I share your media fear and I'm so sorry that it has gone to print for your situation - its heartbreaking that we also have to face this.
This is not your crime. You have done nothing wrong. If people bring it up you are perfectly entitled to say that you don't want to talk about it.
I have disclosed to a select few, not friends, but immediate family and my workplace and this has honestly made a difference and I've had nothing but support.
I would talk to your parents if you feel able. You and your children need the support if nothing else.x
I share your media fear and I'm so sorry that it has gone to print for your situation - its heartbreaking that we also have to face this.
This is not your crime. You have done nothing wrong. If people bring it up you are perfectly entitled to say that you don't want to talk about it.
I have disclosed to a select few, not friends, but immediate family and my workplace and this has honestly made a difference and I've had nothing but support.
I would talk to your parents if you feel able. You and your children need the support if nothing else.x