Safety Plan with No Further Action
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Partner is currently released under investigation. He was on bail but police said they were looking to remove these if we drew up a safety plan with SS. The irony being that the safety plan is basically bail restrictions.
I had the torture of sitting through a family network meeting for the sake of the plan, which included my parents and partners parents. SW started talking about the 'age of the children partner was viewing'. Firstly he's accused of looking at cartoons, which you can't give a definitive age to, so not sure where this came from?! (he reminded SW of this) and secondly this was information not known by my parents so was horrible that they found out that way and information that wasn't even accurate. I was also assured we wouldn't talk about specifics before the meeting.
We agreed to partner having supervised visits at my (previously our) home with our baby, he has been staying at his mums since baby was born. SS wanted visitation times but I specified I needed flexibility with a newborn. They agreed to NFA our case pending the investigation results, as long as we adhered to the plan.
my question is, what happens after investigation results? Will he ever be 'allowed' to live here again? Will SS get back involved? I'm not ready for him to be here but I also wouldn't want to continue living here without him long term, Id look for a new place. Also, how long is a piece of string with the investigaton right? SW actually told us the plan is voluntary but it's not really is it. I'm just terrified of doing something wrong and not being seen to be safeguarding my baby, which is why I'm so confused by how they'll be involved going forward. Never in a million years did I think social services would ever be involved with my child. This is the one hurdle I'm not sure I'll ever forgive partner for. They didn't do a proper risk assessment either. So for example if investigation comes back NFA or caution or low level punishment and I moved partner back in, would they re-open the case? They asked me numerous times about our relationship and I said it was too soon to say as I'm only 7 weeks in and I want to know what comes out of the investigation. Feel as though they wanted me to kick him out for good, put 'no contact' in place and wash my hands of him, but separating both emotionally and financially isn't as simple as that is it :(.
I had the torture of sitting through a family network meeting for the sake of the plan, which included my parents and partners parents. SW started talking about the 'age of the children partner was viewing'. Firstly he's accused of looking at cartoons, which you can't give a definitive age to, so not sure where this came from?! (he reminded SW of this) and secondly this was information not known by my parents so was horrible that they found out that way and information that wasn't even accurate. I was also assured we wouldn't talk about specifics before the meeting.
We agreed to partner having supervised visits at my (previously our) home with our baby, he has been staying at his mums since baby was born. SS wanted visitation times but I specified I needed flexibility with a newborn. They agreed to NFA our case pending the investigation results, as long as we adhered to the plan.
my question is, what happens after investigation results? Will he ever be 'allowed' to live here again? Will SS get back involved? I'm not ready for him to be here but I also wouldn't want to continue living here without him long term, Id look for a new place. Also, how long is a piece of string with the investigaton right? SW actually told us the plan is voluntary but it's not really is it. I'm just terrified of doing something wrong and not being seen to be safeguarding my baby, which is why I'm so confused by how they'll be involved going forward. Never in a million years did I think social services would ever be involved with my child. This is the one hurdle I'm not sure I'll ever forgive partner for. They didn't do a proper risk assessment either. So for example if investigation comes back NFA or caution or low level punishment and I moved partner back in, would they re-open the case? They asked me numerous times about our relationship and I said it was too soon to say as I'm only 7 weeks in and I want to know what comes out of the investigation. Feel as though they wanted me to kick him out for good, put 'no contact' in place and wash my hands of him, but separating both emotionally and financially isn't as simple as that is it :(.
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Thank you for your reply. I've come to realise a lot of my experience so far has been odd/not the norm compared to other things I read on here. Even down to the police not taking all my partners equipment the morning of the knock.
I believe the police wanted to move to RUI to avoid time constraints.
I was furious with SS for disclosing details, especially ones we have no idea where they came from. I feel like you can't challenge them though as they weild a lot of power. I very much got the impression it's whatever makes their jobs easier and not what benefits the family. We were originally told the case would be NFA without the written agreement/safety plan, then all of a sudden they need one. It's been a nightmare journey so far which is why I want to know what to expect from them going forward and if I should get a family solicitor.
I believe the police wanted to move to RUI to avoid time constraints.
I was furious with SS for disclosing details, especially ones we have no idea where they came from. I feel like you can't challenge them though as they weild a lot of power. I very much got the impression it's whatever makes their jobs easier and not what benefits the family. We were originally told the case would be NFA without the written agreement/safety plan, then all of a sudden they need one. It's been a nightmare journey so far which is why I want to know what to expect from them going forward and if I should get a family solicitor.
Hi,
Firstly, I'm sorry that your sw gave both sets of parents false information. I'm glad that your partner set them straight on that. If the investigation goes NFA they are unlikely to receive an update unless you call and inform them. If your partner is charged they are likely to reopen the case either at that stage or after sentencing. It is possible to get your partner back home if you choose to do that in the future. The plans are voluntary and there are thresholds to be met for both child in need and child protection plans. This information should be on your local authority's childrens services pages online. There should also be a guide for how sw conduct their assessments and decide what action to take. I think it would be wise to draw up safety plans for both nfa and what would happen should your partner be charged. This can include what work you will both do (partner to get help with understanding how he ended up here, porn addiction etc. You to do safeguarding course and work on understanding like the infirm course for family), I've put stuff around the work I'll do with baby like nspcc pants work so she knows how to keep herself safe. Ss have closed our case and said we only have to go back when/if he moves back in. Different situation to yours as my older children still live with me and don't want anything to do with him so we're years away from living together xxx
Firstly, I'm sorry that your sw gave both sets of parents false information. I'm glad that your partner set them straight on that. If the investigation goes NFA they are unlikely to receive an update unless you call and inform them. If your partner is charged they are likely to reopen the case either at that stage or after sentencing. It is possible to get your partner back home if you choose to do that in the future. The plans are voluntary and there are thresholds to be met for both child in need and child protection plans. This information should be on your local authority's childrens services pages online. There should also be a guide for how sw conduct their assessments and decide what action to take. I think it would be wise to draw up safety plans for both nfa and what would happen should your partner be charged. This can include what work you will both do (partner to get help with understanding how he ended up here, porn addiction etc. You to do safeguarding course and work on understanding like the infirm course for family), I've put stuff around the work I'll do with baby like nspcc pants work so she knows how to keep herself safe. Ss have closed our case and said we only have to go back when/if he moves back in. Different situation to yours as my older children still live with me and don't want anything to do with him so we're years away from living together xxx
My OH was RUI because we were put on a Child Protection Plan, it shouldn't happen but it makes the police's lives easier.
It is disgusting what the SW did. They will only have snippets of information and no context but still use these snippets to make decisions.
I agree that you should challenge it in writing. When I first had dealings with SS I felt like if they said jump I should ask how high, now I feel like I am war with them. I am challenging everything that I do not agree with.
Remember, you have done nothing wrong.
From my understanding, after the legal case is over, ss will get an independent risk assessment carried out and from that "recomendations" will be made.
It is disgusting what the SW did. They will only have snippets of information and no context but still use these snippets to make decisions.
I agree that you should challenge it in writing. When I first had dealings with SS I felt like if they said jump I should ask how high, now I feel like I am war with them. I am challenging everything that I do not agree with.
Remember, you have done nothing wrong.
From my understanding, after the legal case is over, ss will get an independent risk assessment carried out and from that "recomendations" will be made.
So what they actually mean by 'no further action' is that they won't be involved again until the results of the investigation. It's written in the safety plan that the plan is to be in place until the investigation is complete. No review period or anything and that they wish to be updated on the outcome of the investigation by the police.
I just wish terminology like 'voluntary' and 'discretionary' wasn't used by them as I don't/didn't feel that way at all.
I absolutely hate that they are involved with my young baby and like I said don't think I can ever forgive my partner for this and the stress it's caused me. The constant phone calls/assessments on myself, which as you said is wholly unfair as I've done nothing wrong.
I just wish terminology like 'voluntary' and 'discretionary' wasn't used by them as I don't/didn't feel that way at all.
I absolutely hate that they are involved with my young baby and like I said don't think I can ever forgive my partner for this and the stress it's caused me. The constant phone calls/assessments on myself, which as you said is wholly unfair as I've done nothing wrong.
I feel exactly the same. But you are correct, it's voluntary inly in as much as if you don't follow their "recommendations" they will seek legal advice.
The involvement of SS has by far been the most traumatic part of this experience for me.
The involvement of SS has by far been the most traumatic part of this experience for me.
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I just wish they hadn't come to see me to do the original assessment when I was really vulnerable (a day before my planned birth) I was in such an anxious state I can barely remeber much about the visit just that I was shaking the whole time. They kept asking me about my relationship status and recommending low contact with my partner, which I agreed to at the time. The practicalities of that with a newborn though didn't work out so at least a saving grace is that I now decide when/if he comes to visit and help. We had a very inexperienced SW too which didn't help as she often had to run everything past her supervisor, this normally resulted in what she'd told us changing. In hindsight I wish I'd asked for someone with more experience as I feel like our case was used as a training excersise. My life was used as a training excersise.