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Telling the schools?

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Scared and sickened

Member since
April 2019

7 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2019 2:40amReport post

we are at very early stages.. less than a week after the knock. The schools go back in few days after the Easter holidaya.. what do I tell them? Do I preempt the social worker or wait for their lead? I want to explain to them so they can get he pastoral support they need. And clearly I need to ensure all contact made via me md not their dad.

What did other people do??

Maria

Member since
September 2018

286 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2019 6:55amReport post

I didnt tell school for a few weeks because i was told not to tell anyone and I was nervous about people judging us. But I think i was wrong, I wish i had told school earlier. They have been amazingly supportive and helpful. I told school before social services told me to which was a good thing. It's a delicate balance of telling the right people without it getting out. But in my opinion yes telling either headteacher or safeguarding teacher at school is the right thing to do and gives the children another area of support and shows how seriously to take safeguarding.

Maria

Member since
September 2018

286 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2019 7:01amReport post

In terms of how you tell them, I would clarify that what you want to discuss is private and confidential, it's up to you how much information you give. As its so easily on you may want to keep it very basic, as in there has been an allegation made regarding their dad, he has been arrested and is under investigation for ie grooming and you would like the schools advice and support, advise them he will not be attending school and that you are safeguarding your children and others by ensuring he does not attend school for anything. Then you can discuss with them what the kids know and how you would like school to support them.

??????

Member since
March 2019

8 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2019 8:43amReport post

Hi

Arranged an appointment to have a chat with the headteacher before social services contacted the school. We have always tried to maintain a good relationship with our daughter’s school & to work in partnership with them, so I felt that having them hear what was going on from me rather than a social worker was the way I wanted to go. The social worker had already discussed social services’ safety plan on the phone to me which is that my husband cannot be unsupervised with anyone below the age of 18. He can be with people below 18 as long as there is someone in the same room as my husband to supervise him (the social worker said this could be myself or his mother). I explained this to the headteacher who has said she will have him on the premises as long as the safety plan is followed which meant that he can attend parents evenings with a designated supervisor etc. The headteacher has been very supportive so far. She has taken the decision not to tell any other member of staff. However if my daughter starts to become upset in school I will request that her class teacher is told at least that the family’s living arrangements have changed (husband is not living with us for the foreseeable future) as I would want the class teacher to be able to give my daughter the care that she needs.

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2019 3:21pmReport post

My daughter is at nursery, but certainly try and tell them before they find out from children services that way your in control of the situation.



Also love to everyone this Easter , I know special occasions can be challenging and it’s hard to present a happy face all day but I hope everyone’s families are good.xxx