Family and Friends Forum

Johnny555

Member since
March 2019

15 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 2:45pmReport post

It looks like I may have been successful in arranging a visit to my sons prison. This will be my first ever visit to a prison. Does anyone have any advice on what I might expect as I have no idea really. Is it normal to take things in with me, books, headphones etc ???

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 4:37pmReport post

I'm so glad you've been able to arrange this. You won't be able to take anything into the visits. Each prison has different rules of when and what you can send in, but this will be organised seperately.

Each prision will also have different rules and protocols for visits. If you look for the prison on the Gov website, there should be a link to the charity that runs the visits and some information as to what to expect, this might be out if date though, there might be a contact number so you can call ahead to find out what to expect.

This is my experience. On the first visit I needed to take ID and a proof of address. They took my photo and finger print. For all visits we are searched, can only take money (coins only) and ID into the visitors hall. Once in the hall, we go to the table with our person on it. We can embrace at the beginning and end, but no contact the rest of the time. We have to sit opposite one another. There is a little cafe and the orderlies take and bring us our order. The prison guards are mostly warm and friendly. I've made a couple of 'friends' with other visitors - I've never been so grateful for the warm and knowing smiles from them on my first visits.


The first few visits are a mix of emotions, a surreal experience, but in time it gets better. They are so happy to have that time away from their room and to see and talk, it overshadows everything else that feels so abnormal.

Edited Mon December 12, 2022 4:40pm

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 4:42pmReport post

Oh, the other thing is clothing. It's more for women, I think the only thing I've seen that would impact men is now slogans, ripped jeans or bare arms. To be sure, go conservative (I always go smart casual).

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 4:48pmReport post

Hi Johnny555

So glad to hear you have managed to get a visit, hope you are all bearing up ok

You will need to bring proof of I'd, (driving licence or passport)

It all depends on where your son is as to weather you can bring books in, give the booking line number a call and they can let you know, if yes then you need to write your sons name and prison number and also your name and relationship ( write in pencil rather than pen)

Depending if they have a canteen find out if you need change rather than notes, where my son is we can buy drinks and snacks etc but have to use change only)

The first visit is always the hardest but just been able to hug him will make it worthwhile

On entry to the prison you will be searched usually just a patdown , no smart watches are allowed, you should be given a locker to leave your personal property in

Also no jackets or sweatshirts with hoods are allowed

Is your son in a SO prison? If so the visits are absolutely fine as they are not mixed with mainstream people, I know when my son was on remand the anxiety level was high purely because it was mixed, the place he is in is so much calmer and the staff are fine,

If you need any other info please let me know

I bet you cannot wait to see him xx

Johnny555

Member since
March 2019

15 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 5:54pmReport post

Thank you so much for your replies. I'm assuming that mobile phones are not allowed, are they locked away whilst I'm in there?

Johnny555

Member since
March 2019

15 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 5:58pmReport post

Also, what is the situation regarding Christmas cards. I guess it's okay to send them using normal mail, is that right? Can anyone write to him using this method. ?

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 6:18pmReport post

Hi Johnny555

No phones are permitted they have to be left in the locker

As for letters and cards anyone can send in to your son. All mail is opened prior to been given to our loved ones

X

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 6:51pmReport post

How envious I feel of you guys I would so love to see my son and give him a hug (I haven't seen him for two years).

He's so far away now and we are in a very difficult family situation, but one day it'll come..... I worry I wouldn't recognise my own boy :(

BUT we talk all the time and i have that to be grateful for, I even told him off for swearing too much today!!!! Haha...

All the best on your visit Johnny, I'm so glad for you.

Edited Mon December 12, 2022 6:53pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 7:23pmReport post

Smile

Your time will come when you are both ready for a visit

Your daily chats with your son means so much to you both and no matter how old they are they still need a telling off :-)

My offer will always be there for you if you need some support on a visit xx

SAL

Member since
December 2021

895 posts

Posted Mon December 12, 2022 7:26pmReport post

I'm the prison my person is in, all mail id photocopied and given to them, unless it comes from an approved supplier. I can send cards from Moonpig and photos from Free Prints.

I leave everything I can, including mobile phones in the car - One less thing to worry about loosing it forgetting. They also often run out of lockers with keys where I go.