Family and Friends Forum

Hi Upset mum,







I don't think any one could have said it better, I am still here, but keep having issues with my phone, I try to help then my phone goes all funny and I lose wat I write, ( maybe I write to much lol )

Hope ur all OK

I am relatively new on this forum, we had the knock on July 5th. My husband is accused of making and distributing indecent images on kik. I am so glad I found this forum, chatting to you ladies has been a lifeline for me!

Hi HPl 111, my now ex partner was also accused of making / distributing on kik in July. Did the police indicate how he had been caught and what the possibility of finding evidence was?

@Losteverything: I asked the police woman on the day of the knock and she didn't really want to give me much information where the intelligence came from. She just mumbled something about some report they received.

The intelligence they received was that an indecent image had been distributed at the beginning of January on kik from our IP address.

When my husband came home from the police station, he admitted that he viewed indecent images on kik. He couldn't tell me how long, but probably 1 to 2 years.

He said it was very infrequent, he was on this porn groups, where normal adult pornography was posted and also other things like everyday videos, funny videos and memes. He said he's been on these groups for many years and only in recent years every now and then there were videos of "child pornography". He said on kik very often you only know what a video is about once it is downloaded and sometimes clicking on a link downloads videos in a bulk.

He took ownership of what he did and he knows there is no excuse.

Now this is where it gets confusing.... I have a strong gut feeling that my husband has been honest with me and his admissions are sincere.

He told me he can't remember distributing a video. I asked him over and over again and he said he honestly can't remember ever sharing a video. Of course the police would say now that of course he would hide the truth, but I know that my husband would tell me if he was able to remember it ( he's been honest with everything else).

My husband deleted the app in January and he's always deleted all the files downloaded to his phone.

His duty solicitor at the police station said that the police can recover every deleted file and that it is best to just confess. Based on that my husband admitted at the police station to the offence.

He now has hired a solicitor specialising in indecent images/sex offences.

This solicitor said that it is 50/50 whether the police can recover deleted files on mobile phones. Apparently it is much easier to recover deleted files on laptops.

Thank you for your reply HPl , the kik app should be banned! My story sounds very similar to yours. I just hope that what my ex has done will be discovered as he also deleted everything and wiped his phone.

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I wish I could hug each and everyone on here, because I know how hard this all is, the roller coaster of emotions in the beginning are the worst, they do easy but sooner or later when you think you are getting a little better it all comes back up and bites you in the rearend. I'm only 2 months in and still cry a lot in my day to day life, but look at everything to do with what my person has done logically, I also try not to jump to conclusions or judge. I wish that none of us were in this situation and do believe that social media should be held accountable and apps like kik should be deleted.

Agree with all you say Dragonmama - not a day passes when you don't think/reflect with sadness on this journey.

I strongly feel if this stuff was not available on the internet my son would not be where he is now! It's terrifying (as we've said many many times) how vulnerable people + youngsters can SO easily get sucked in, then end up in serious trouble with life changing consequences.

it's so wrong and yet absolutely nothing is done about it....

Where did Lee1969 go to. She gave such good advice and was so knowledgable in her advice to me in the early days.

I completely agree with you all. We would probably not be in this position if it were not so easy for our sons to be sucked into the horrible side of the internet.

We took our son to a counsellor a few years ago because he was feeling down. We were very anti tech gadgets and the internet and were constantly trying to reduce his phone usage and trying to get him not to spend so much time lying on his bed looking at his phone.

The counsellor said we should let him have his space, always knock when entering his room and respect his privacy. It was during his time attending that counsellor he accessed child pornography. The situation we find ourselves in at the minute is absoluely not caused by the counsellor but I really feel they gave us very bad and unhealthy advice.

So sad.

Upset Mum. Thank you for your post, I too am an upset Mum and its so painful but we have to keep moving forward. Hope this year will bring you some much needed peace in your heart. Xx

Mandymoo You can contact Lee on mumsnet her user name is mintypeas

Xx

I think this is the horrific side to this crime, you just get caught cold, are in disbelief that a loved one has lived a secret life right under your nose! Its such a shock......

Hi hpl111 and losteverything,

My ex partner is also one of the people from this said Kik group. He also stated it was used for general adult material and memes etc, until a random file was sent and he downloaded it. He said he only opened 1 image and then deleted the file. He didn't know how many were in there until police said they had recovered 100 images, not sure on the Cat. Only 1 image was opened (so he says). His solicitor also specialises in these crimes, said he's hopeful for a suspended. xx