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Trying to put brave face on at work.

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Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Thu January 19, 2023 4:53pmReport post

Hi Ladies me again. Just a rant really. I'm really struggling to be "normal" at work. I'm in the care industry and need to be cheerful all the time which I'm really struggling with. I just can't bear the waiting for the cps decision. Worried sick about my son, who has been advised by sw to come out of college before we get the ok from oic that he can be around under 18 at college. He is gutted. He is only just 18 himself and feeling suicidal. This should have been dealt with at the time of the crime when he was only 16, this just feels so unfair. Then I think about the victims and feel guilty for worrying about us. I pray so much that the cps issue a caution because he was so young at the time but I know we won't be that lucky. Sorry for the woe me post but I feel so low today xxx

King85

Member since
December 2022

24 posts

Posted Thu January 19, 2023 5:42pmReport post

Kt, I completely feel the same. Tomorrow is my first day back in the office and it's only been a month since the knock. I'm lucky that my employer are wonderful, having explained what's happening in my life ( with minimal specific details) and they have been amazingly supportive. Ironically I worked in the care sector for over 10 years until 2021 and I can't even imagine what it would be like if I still worked there and had to deal with what's happening, as although it was a 'caring environment' it wasnt always the most caring when you needed time out for a genuine life struggle or to take time for mental health recovery, and it's hard to smile when you really can't but feel like you need to to make others happy.

I understand how it's hard to keep smiling, but take it one day at a time... I know a lot of people have probably said that but I force myself not to think about the future too much as I know it would set me back to the state I was in when the knock happened.

Remember you're not alone x x x

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Thu January 19, 2023 5:46pmReport post

Bless you Kt its so sad

I cant even imagine how he must be feeling and of course the worry you have to carry as a mum we just want to protect our sons don't we

I hope he is getting some help with how low he is feeling xx

My son was 26 when we got the knock and for 2 years while under investigation he was really suicidal I lived on my nerves every day

In work I had to carry on as normal but at home I was a wreck but he didn't go through with it thankfully and even though he has a lengthy time to serve in prison he is still here so I am grateful for that even though it's a horrendous journey

I hope they are understanding of your sons age etc

Not much advise but just wanted to let you know you are not alone sending hugs xx

Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Thu January 19, 2023 5:51pmReport post

Thank you so much for your replies.

I actually work in mental health so you would think i would have the skills to keep myself level headed, but I've discovered it doesn't work like that lol.

Again thank you for replying it helps so much knowing we have this forum for support doesn't it xxx

SoTired

Member since
March 2021

387 posts

Posted Thu January 19, 2023 10:14pmReport post

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Edited Mon January 23, 2023 6:41pm

Maij

Member since
December 2020

287 posts

Posted Fri January 20, 2023 2:44amReport post

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Edited Fri June 30, 2023 1:11am

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Fri January 20, 2023 5:16amReport post

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Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am

Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Fri January 20, 2023 7:59amReport post

Thank you, you are all just so amazing,

My son only has 6 weeks left on his course so it's such a shame if they say no but thats put of our hands.Our sw is speaking the oic on Mon to find out for us.

He is on bail now until 31st March (preparing for extension)

Offense happened when he was 16 but police didn't come until 10 months later when he was then 17, investigation happened then came back for arrest weeks after his 18th birthday.

Thank you ladies xxxxxx