Family and Friends Forum

First of all, I don't know much about iioc as my person's charges were communication, but keep an open mind, my person swore he didn't send pics and he did as I had full disclosure of evidence and he was always gonna give me it and was honest from the start. It was a shoch but he swears he doesn't even remember sending it, still now. He got no charges on it? So I've no idea how police can tell anyone in the NHS the full evidence they have and your person hasn't pled guilty to anything. In fact as told me he posed as a child online and he was given the wrong info because the idiot gave his real age and middle name. So be careful who you listen to and what they say. It's all still raw for you, I once had all these questions it's like a whirl pool in your mind, but I asked my person to write me a letter of exactly what was said in chat and how it came about. It made it easier on both of us and gave me space to think thiings through. Take one thing at a time, give yourself a while to process it then move o to other questions etc. Have you spoke to helpline? Or your gp? We are here for you, and like you I had no one to talk to except people on this form. I honestly don't k ow what I would have done without it so keep posting xx

I can't help on the specific questions because my person was talk with an adult about a child.

I too had concerns about my person's mental wellbeing. We also wrote letters as we found it easier. This might sound silly, but we also agreed he'd answer questions on text messages whilst I was not with him, but I made it clear he had to be 100% honest with me - Rip the plaster off as it were. During this exchange he did open up more, I think it helped not having to look me in the eye as he admitted things, he couldn't see my reaction. I think we'd both mentally prepared for this - Him to be honest and be to be calm and not react to anything. I wanted to know the truth and knew by not reacting I was more likely to get that.

As Newlady has said, it's important you get the support you need. But it's important he gets the support he needs too, this might in turn help you.

They can't access or use his go file, they must get written permission or a Warren for this. I work for NHS, I have access to personal files and it's against the law for me to look up antibes files unless it's my patient, it's confidential and a sackable offence. So if ss say they have access to these it's total bulls***

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I have a feeling it may be social services in regards to the GP? I don't know for sure but having worked in a hospital and dealing with referrals there was often mention of social services involvement in patients history (more common than you would think) but it never stated the ins and outs (it wouldn't do because that information isn't relevant to patient care but knowing involvement has happened previously may help towards safeguarding in certain situations). I'm not 100% but perhaps you could request to know if there is anything on your record too and maybe that way you will know if that was the source if it's bothering you x

Perhaps the Police called as that's their safeguarding process if your husband's welfare was a concern thinking about it. I had a few instances in my job where I had to call the GP to alert them to things as they have access to sources of help I didn't. Just read your latest comment and it popped into my mind x