Update on my OH
Notifications OFF
I haven’t been on the forum for a while as my partner received a custodial and it’s been pretty tough for us all for the last month.
Everything was going relatively ok until he was moved to a higher security prison than he was categorized as, as there is no room in cat C prisons and it is a huge step backwards, it’s one of the worst in the country. He gets one visit a month as that’s the prison policy and they’re only on weekdays meaning booking time off work. The prison does not offer the sexual offending courses he needs to complete. And word on the grapevine is it’s unlikely he will get transferred again as there’s no room anywhere else. He is locked up 23 hours a day with no support, barely any visits, and no way to get help for his offending behaviours. He should never have been sent to such a strict prison but there’s nothing we can do. I feel so powerless and upset that I either have to use half my annual leave to see him once a month or I’ll barely see him until he is released, knowing he isn’t even going to get any help inside that prison so it's like we're all suffering for no good reason. He’s upset that he can’t do the courses either as he wants to better understand why he did what he did and wants to get better. The prison he's at has basically not reversed any of the regimes brought in place during covid as they don’t have enough staff, it's like he's been left there to rot. Does anyone have experience of prison transfers and the prison system at the moment? It feels like the system is completely broken
Sorry rant over!
Everything was going relatively ok until he was moved to a higher security prison than he was categorized as, as there is no room in cat C prisons and it is a huge step backwards, it’s one of the worst in the country. He gets one visit a month as that’s the prison policy and they’re only on weekdays meaning booking time off work. The prison does not offer the sexual offending courses he needs to complete. And word on the grapevine is it’s unlikely he will get transferred again as there’s no room anywhere else. He is locked up 23 hours a day with no support, barely any visits, and no way to get help for his offending behaviours. He should never have been sent to such a strict prison but there’s nothing we can do. I feel so powerless and upset that I either have to use half my annual leave to see him once a month or I’ll barely see him until he is released, knowing he isn’t even going to get any help inside that prison so it's like we're all suffering for no good reason. He’s upset that he can’t do the courses either as he wants to better understand why he did what he did and wants to get better. The prison he's at has basically not reversed any of the regimes brought in place during covid as they don’t have enough staff, it's like he's been left there to rot. Does anyone have experience of prison transfers and the prison system at the moment? It feels like the system is completely broken
Sorry rant over!
I'm sorry to hear or your situation. I have been thinking of you, wondering how you are doing.
I feel your discomfort at having to use annual leave to visit. Our situation is slightly different but because of the distance I have been using it to visit - But at least that's choice.
You are right, the prison system is very broken.
I don't have experience of prison transfers. My person should have been re categorised some months ago but hasn't been and has been told there is a long waiting list for Cat D.
I'd suggest reaching out to some of the services/charities to support prisoners and their family.
Prison Advise Service might be able to help or PACT.
Will he be entitled to more visits when he's enhanced? Do they offer video calls? No one told us these were available, it was only through talking to other visitors I became aware.
Does the prison offer employment?
The prison my person is in, still hasn't lifted a lot of the covid regime. He is locked up 23 hours a day unless he's at work, gym or chaplain.
I feel your discomfort at having to use annual leave to visit. Our situation is slightly different but because of the distance I have been using it to visit - But at least that's choice.
You are right, the prison system is very broken.
I don't have experience of prison transfers. My person should have been re categorised some months ago but hasn't been and has been told there is a long waiting list for Cat D.
I'd suggest reaching out to some of the services/charities to support prisoners and their family.
Prison Advise Service might be able to help or PACT.
Will he be entitled to more visits when he's enhanced? Do they offer video calls? No one told us these were available, it was only through talking to other visitors I became aware.
Does the prison offer employment?
The prison my person is in, still hasn't lifted a lot of the covid regime. He is locked up 23 hours a day unless he's at work, gym or chaplain.
Oh my Lucy22 you must be beside yourself with worry.
All I can suggest is your partner seeks a job, education, gym, chapel, library anything to get him out his cell and earning a little bit of money too. My son does art class am then his gardening job pm - so fully occupied and with association time so he's not locked up for long. Yes, staff shortages are a nightmare.....
He is in a Cat B but it's being converted to a Cat C training prison for sex offenders. He's been in custody for two years and no sign of any treatment programme, which I feel is ridiculous. It needs addressing immediately, not just on release.
They can randomly be moved around - my sons been in four prisons (each time further away sadly) so let's hope your partner could be moved, hopefully nearer...
it's so bloody hard and frustrating for sure.....
All I can suggest is your partner seeks a job, education, gym, chapel, library anything to get him out his cell and earning a little bit of money too. My son does art class am then his gardening job pm - so fully occupied and with association time so he's not locked up for long. Yes, staff shortages are a nightmare.....
He is in a Cat B but it's being converted to a Cat C training prison for sex offenders. He's been in custody for two years and no sign of any treatment programme, which I feel is ridiculous. It needs addressing immediately, not just on release.
They can randomly be moved around - my sons been in four prisons (each time further away sadly) so let's hope your partner could be moved, hopefully nearer...
it's so bloody hard and frustrating for sure.....
Hi Sal, it’s so frustrating, we didn’t ask for this situation or cause it but it affects us so enormously. So there’s even delays to being re-categorised? It does not sound hopeful!! My OH is already enhanced but the booking line person told me it doesn’t matter, they only let them have one a month and only on one particular day of the week which changes each week so you have to phone up to book as it’s not automated. They do do video calls but they’re 30 minutes and also scheduled on a “wing rotation” slot basis. The prison offers two types of job for his wing, he’s been told he was sent there to work one of them as they need workers in that role basically. And if he works he gets no time out to go to the library I believe, his 1 hour social time is at the same time as the job. I said how do you shower or anything and he said they give them 5 – 10 mins at the end of the work day to shower but that’s it. They let their wing go to the gym but only on weekends. It’s so frustrating. It’s not right they can lock them up that long and have the excuse of the covid regimes still in 2023.
Smile I remembered you said your son had been moved a lot! 4 prisons in 2 years is mad, having to get used to new people and new rules/regimes each time. Do they even give reasons about why they aren’t doing the courses like a backlog or lack of staff? I just can’t imagine anyone going through their whole sentence with no help. Once people are released they’ll be stressed about life again and less focused on meaningful therapy, they’ll be worrying how they’ll pay for food or where they’ll sleep if they end up homeless. I bloody hope my OH gets moved at some point, it’s an entire day’s round trip of travelling to see him and his parents are getting on and struggle with the long journeys
Smile I remembered you said your son had been moved a lot! 4 prisons in 2 years is mad, having to get used to new people and new rules/regimes each time. Do they even give reasons about why they aren’t doing the courses like a backlog or lack of staff? I just can’t imagine anyone going through their whole sentence with no help. Once people are released they’ll be stressed about life again and less focused on meaningful therapy, they’ll be worrying how they’ll pay for food or where they’ll sleep if they end up homeless. I bloody hope my OH gets moved at some point, it’s an entire day’s round trip of travelling to see him and his parents are getting on and struggle with the long journeys
Hi Lucy.
Yes- each prison move is stressful but I'm just amazed how my son has adapted and just got on with it. He's now 160 plus miles away from us, wow that was a shock!
There's been no mention of anything regarding treatment, there was a fleeting reference to a 'behaviour management' course at his last place but that came to nothing!
I feel my son should be dealing with it NOW - he'll have enough to cope with on release, as he will be homeless.
im extremely scared for his future to be honest.
Yes- each prison move is stressful but I'm just amazed how my son has adapted and just got on with it. He's now 160 plus miles away from us, wow that was a shock!
There's been no mention of anything regarding treatment, there was a fleeting reference to a 'behaviour management' course at his last place but that came to nothing!
I feel my son should be dealing with it NOW - he'll have enough to cope with on release, as he will be homeless.
im extremely scared for his future to be honest.
Smile the system is just broken, they’re better off not being sentenced to prison at all as they’ll get more help in the community than inside. I hope your son will be ok! I’ve heard they sometimes put prisoners in hostels on release and can work with the council to help with finding housing. And they can start the process of finding accommodation 6 months before release
Lucy - yes that what I've read. He'll be 'on licence' for a while so surely they won't throw him on the streets. I really try so hard not to dwell on it to be honest Lucy as he's still got a while to serve.
It's no good for you to overthink the future, I've learnt that on this journey.
keep strong x
It's no good for you to overthink the future, I've learnt that on this journey.
keep strong x
Lucy22
So sorry to read your post it's just so difficult
My son is in a SO cat c and has been there for 8 months it's ok he has a bit of a routine and works, but there is no programmes available which is beyond belief
I know you can put in for a transfer but god knows how long that would take
The prisons are getting fuller by the day it's a broken system
Not much advise but just wanted to send you hugs x
So sorry to read your post it's just so difficult
My son is in a SO cat c and has been there for 8 months it's ok he has a bit of a routine and works, but there is no programmes available which is beyond belief
I know you can put in for a transfer but god knows how long that would take
The prisons are getting fuller by the day it's a broken system
Not much advise but just wanted to send you hugs x
Oh Lucy, I wish I had some advice for you.
My person was at first resistant to being sent to work - Frustrated that he had no choice, annoyed he'd miss time in the yard and angry it meant he'd come back to cold food. But now he's in work it's an important part of his routine and he really doesn't like it when it when work is cancelled, given the choice he'd work now over time in the yard.y
When my person first arrived he resisted through frustration at what he felt was injustice in the way they were treated, the lack of choice and autonomy, and lack of meaningful activities available for his wing. He's settled in now and has made what is available to him work. It's not easy, he has low days and we are endlessly frustrated and trying to navigate something but he has got into a rhythm.
My person was at first resistant to being sent to work - Frustrated that he had no choice, annoyed he'd miss time in the yard and angry it meant he'd come back to cold food. But now he's in work it's an important part of his routine and he really doesn't like it when it when work is cancelled, given the choice he'd work now over time in the yard.y
When my person first arrived he resisted through frustration at what he felt was injustice in the way they were treated, the lack of choice and autonomy, and lack of meaningful activities available for his wing. He's settled in now and has made what is available to him work. It's not easy, he has low days and we are endlessly frustrated and trying to navigate something but he has got into a rhythm.
Hi Upset, it’s so bad your son is in a SO prison and there’s no courses! They need help not to be left there with no support. My OH put in a few apps to be transferred to a SO prison and was told they’re so full it’s practically one in one out. Where he is now if he wants to use the gym or library it’s at the same time as his social hours so it’s like he has to choose between the two. The only benefit is he has a single cell and in cell phone so we’ve been able to have a lot of long (expensive!) chats.
Sal - glad to know your person has settled into a routine, I think that’s the best thing they can do as a routine helps the time go by a bit better. And when they work they earn money! They do penalise the VP wings a lot, they don’t get to do anywhere near as much as the main prison as there’s not enough staff. At OH’s first prison they had stopped all education for the VP wing
It just feels like everyone’s lied, probation and the solicitors said he will go to an SO prison where he can do the courses and get better, PSR report even recommended a “new technique” where he do the courses both in prison and again on license, that’s looking very unlikely now
Sending hugs to you all, we can get through this x
Sal - glad to know your person has settled into a routine, I think that’s the best thing they can do as a routine helps the time go by a bit better. And when they work they earn money! They do penalise the VP wings a lot, they don’t get to do anywhere near as much as the main prison as there’s not enough staff. At OH’s first prison they had stopped all education for the VP wing
It just feels like everyone’s lied, probation and the solicitors said he will go to an SO prison where he can do the courses and get better, PSR report even recommended a “new technique” where he do the courses both in prison and again on license, that’s looking very unlikely now
Sending hugs to you all, we can get through this x