Family and Friends Forum

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 12:54pmReport post

Just checking in on everyone and wishing you all well.

I’m moving on with my new life. Still living alone, but living life and getting involved in the community again. I’ve not come up against any nastiness which I hope will encourage those that, like me, were subjected to a vigilante Facebook livestream. I did not move away or change my name, despite feeling that was what I needed to do when in my fight or flight mode. However ex moved out straight away and I came off all social media. So I think that made it all easier for those around me to support me. It was very hard coming to terms with the loss of my husband and my life as I knew it, and the fear of repercussions, but with supportive family and friends and therapy, I came through it, the experience changed me for sure, but I hope, for the better.

Ex has served prison sentence and is on license building a new life, I have built my own changed life, much is the same as before, but I do have to still live with the after effects. I think I always will.

There has been a major event in my ex’s family, this has caused ripples that hit me, but I am strong enough now to not let them affect me too much. I put myself first now, and recognise what I need to do to protect myself and avoid toxic people and behaviours.

I hope this post gives some hope

K4

Member since
October 2022

608 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 1:48pmReport post

Thank you for sharing this. It's so good to hear from people who haven't moved or changed names and have found things manageable. I am so sorry that you have had to go through this



xx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 4:33pmReport post

Tabs

It is always lovely to get an update on how you are and I am pleased to read you are doing ok and have a great support network around you xx

WorseThanAnyNightmare

Member since
April 2022

82 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 6:27pmReport post

Good to hear from someone who has been through all this and is now at the other side having survived. On days where I feel like I can't carry on fighting this, I try to remind myself there are lots of us who are dealing with the same sort of fight.

RIG22

Member since
September 2022

138 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 8:39pmReport post

Tabs thank you so much for sharing. Your post gave me hope that life can go on so thank you again for sharing. X

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Thu January 26, 2023 9:30pmReport post

Lovley to hear from you Tabs so pleased you have been able to gradually move on positively with your life xx

Losteverything

Member since
September 2022

216 posts

Posted Fri January 27, 2023 1:24amReport post

Thanks for you post, Tabs. It's great to hear from someone who has left their partner and successfully moving on in life. If have left my partner but struggling to cope with life without him. My whole future has changed . Sometimes I feel confident and strong about being alone and at other times I'm a wreck!!

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Fri January 27, 2023 4:16amReport post

I just get fed up about thinking about our family situation day in day out - just wonder if my head will ever be free of this mess.

Reading threads like yours gives me hope xxxx

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Fri January 27, 2023 10:54pmReport post

Thank you all. I can definitely say that I have been through all the awful emotions possible; fear, shame, anxiety, anger, despair, sadness, grief, helpless, emptiness etc but I am finally in a position where this doesn't take over my whole being, and I have found peace in my new life, and you will too. I feel so much for you all, and will always try, where I can, to make a difference to those that inevitably follow, however futile my attempts are! I will never forget this experience, it's something that I don't think anyone can totally forget.
One day, the world will start to really see us, and recognise that we too are victims.
Keep strong! You will get through this xxx