Why won’t this pain just go
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Hi all,
It's been a few months now and the initial shock has gone, just trying to get on with life, some neighbours still persistent in being (insert rude word here of your choosing). Daughter getting fed up with being watched every time she goes into the garden so she stuck her finger up (can't blame her) and they shouted the P word at her...... that's right a full grown adult shouted that at a 13 year old child. Disgraceful and disgusting. Will be reporting it but not sure at the same time as don't want more backlash. I have to live here after all.
anyway some days are ok and bearable some days are just plain hard, some days I just cry because something tiny reminds me of my OH could be something as simple as taking a glass out the cupboard or something more significant of course.
Every time I'm reminded of my OH in some way shape or form I feel like my heart is just breaking all over again. I just want the pain to go away, I want to just remember the happier times and be happy about those times not flooded with hurt and anguish.
All of this like mourning a death but no death has occurred. What I want and what I get are two completely different things in life.
im trying to be supportive of him I know he was an idiot for talking to a decoy but know he has no interest in kids of any kind. Sometimes I think he forgets I'm doing everything. I never intended to be raising my children alone but here I am doing it. I never thought my life would go down this route but here I am navigating it as best I can.
still not managed to get any form of support from ss or police etc and just feeling alone again. Having to put a smile on my face to talk to my parents because they just don't want to hear any of it not even how I'm feeling about everything. Can't talk to his family because they have completely disowned him, won't even talk to my children and have made no effort to do so and I just don't feel like it should be down to me to call them. They don't support me either. His family is cruel tbh thought they would have offered some support to me but nope guess not.
I want to talk to people in person or on the phone and actuall have a conversation even if it's just to get stuff off my chest, but then I feel like I'm a burden.
feeling alone sad and broken seems to be just day to day life now
sorry, just venting
It's been a few months now and the initial shock has gone, just trying to get on with life, some neighbours still persistent in being (insert rude word here of your choosing). Daughter getting fed up with being watched every time she goes into the garden so she stuck her finger up (can't blame her) and they shouted the P word at her...... that's right a full grown adult shouted that at a 13 year old child. Disgraceful and disgusting. Will be reporting it but not sure at the same time as don't want more backlash. I have to live here after all.
anyway some days are ok and bearable some days are just plain hard, some days I just cry because something tiny reminds me of my OH could be something as simple as taking a glass out the cupboard or something more significant of course.
Every time I'm reminded of my OH in some way shape or form I feel like my heart is just breaking all over again. I just want the pain to go away, I want to just remember the happier times and be happy about those times not flooded with hurt and anguish.
All of this like mourning a death but no death has occurred. What I want and what I get are two completely different things in life.
im trying to be supportive of him I know he was an idiot for talking to a decoy but know he has no interest in kids of any kind. Sometimes I think he forgets I'm doing everything. I never intended to be raising my children alone but here I am doing it. I never thought my life would go down this route but here I am navigating it as best I can.
still not managed to get any form of support from ss or police etc and just feeling alone again. Having to put a smile on my face to talk to my parents because they just don't want to hear any of it not even how I'm feeling about everything. Can't talk to his family because they have completely disowned him, won't even talk to my children and have made no effort to do so and I just don't feel like it should be down to me to call them. They don't support me either. His family is cruel tbh thought they would have offered some support to me but nope guess not.
I want to talk to people in person or on the phone and actuall have a conversation even if it's just to get stuff off my chest, but then I feel like I'm a burden.
feeling alone sad and broken seems to be just day to day life now
sorry, just venting
It's early days for me but I know exactly how you feel, was at the GP earlier and saying 6 months waiting list for therapy, my family want nothing to do with him either I mean I got to respect their decision but it does make you feel worse inside, I literally broke down again at the Gp everytime I verabally talk about it I end up crying and am a complete mess. my ex was a massive support to me as we have a disabled daughter that's a part-time wheelchair user so she's feeling it too and been told can be up to 10 weeks until supervised access is sorted, I'm isolated as know one comes here and I can't tell anyone for the fear of their reaction then loosing more people and the fear of what's to come if it goes in the media. I haven't chosen weather to get back together as it's too early for me to consider everything. Weather he can be rehabilitated, what made him do it ? Is he attracted to children ? Can the relationship be fixed ? So many questions. Just know your not alone xx
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I get the resentment. The other evening, I was thinking how lucky my husband is to not have any of the responsibilities of looking after the kids, dog, house etc and juggling work. He doesn't have to do any of the activity drop offs and sports. I know he would rather be here with us but it does sometimes feel like he has the easier life now. He hasn't had to face any of our friends, family or neighbours (who've fortunately all been great).
I'm so sorry about your neighbours Dragon, that must be so hard to live in such a hostile environment.
I'm so sorry about your neighbours Dragon, that must be so hard to live in such a hostile environment.
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So sorry Dragonmama I can't imagine how you must be feeling (not that far into this nightmare journey).
Your poor daughter it is incomprehensible that anyone could take their ignorance out on her.
if it were me I would put a nice letter through their door explaining that their actions are making your (innocent) lives a misery. And to please have a little compassion.
if that fails ... then report them to the Police ... it is intimidating and unacceptable behaviour.
Sending a massive virtual hug x
Your poor daughter it is incomprehensible that anyone could take their ignorance out on her.
if it were me I would put a nice letter through their door explaining that their actions are making your (innocent) lives a misery. And to please have a little compassion.
if that fails ... then report them to the Police ... it is intimidating and unacceptable behaviour.
Sending a massive virtual hug x