Why do people question my decisions?
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I know it's hard. I know for sure that my sister doesn't understand why I'm am standing by my OH, she is supporting me but she doesn't understand.
Ask your self what you would say if you were in their shoes?
I know that if a year a go, a friend of mine told me that their partner had done what my OH has done, I would have told them to leave. A year ago I would expect a jail sentence for anyone in possession of 1 iioc.
This journey opens our minds and our hearts. We see past the offences because we know the person behind them.
Ask your self what you would say if you were in their shoes?
I know that if a year a go, a friend of mine told me that their partner had done what my OH has done, I would have told them to leave. A year ago I would expect a jail sentence for anyone in possession of 1 iioc.
This journey opens our minds and our hearts. We see past the offences because we know the person behind them.
I completely understand your frustration. Although I don't think anyone would dare say that my husband is the P word to me as they know me well enough. I think it's disgusting that someone has said this to you and I'm so sorry they have. These people have no idea what we are going through. As for your MIL don't answer the phone if she is saying things that are upsetting you, I have taken a step back from mine for a bit because it was too much. My husband does live with myself and the kids and I am here for him bit we are not together atm.
You sound like a strong lady keep your chin up and ignore the hate. X
You sound like a strong lady keep your chin up and ignore the hate. X
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Hi,
A couple of things that your post has brought to my mind and I want to share. The first, controversially perhaps is that maybe like me you feel the judgment because it actually comes from your thoughts. I question myself so much on why I'm considering a relationship with my person that I feel like I'm going insane at times. It goes without saying that none of us condone what our people have done but in my head I almost constantly question if my moral compass is off. I've only had support for myself and my children but have had people close to me not understanding how and why I'm leaving our relationship open to the option of rebuilding.
The second thing is I have had almost the opposite to your mil, mine questioned him on whether he was sure I was the right person for him. That hurt a lot tbh and I'm not sure she knows that I know. She has her own demons to contend with and I've got more important things to sort out so decided to leave it between them.
As has already been said none of us knew what our reactions would be until we were put in this position. I think I'd try to politely ask friends not to use unhelpful language but keep the conversation lines open to raise awareness of the issues that can lead people into this world xxx
A couple of things that your post has brought to my mind and I want to share. The first, controversially perhaps is that maybe like me you feel the judgment because it actually comes from your thoughts. I question myself so much on why I'm considering a relationship with my person that I feel like I'm going insane at times. It goes without saying that none of us condone what our people have done but in my head I almost constantly question if my moral compass is off. I've only had support for myself and my children but have had people close to me not understanding how and why I'm leaving our relationship open to the option of rebuilding.
The second thing is I have had almost the opposite to your mil, mine questioned him on whether he was sure I was the right person for him. That hurt a lot tbh and I'm not sure she knows that I know. She has her own demons to contend with and I've got more important things to sort out so decided to leave it between them.
As has already been said none of us knew what our reactions would be until we were put in this position. I think I'd try to politely ask friends not to use unhelpful language but keep the conversation lines open to raise awareness of the issues that can lead people into this world xxx
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I totally understand how you feel but, hand on heart, before I was catapulted into this world, I would have been totally judgemental about this situation. I would not have understood anything about it, would have automatically labelled the person a 'p' and would have thought a woman crazy to stick with a man under these circumstances (or in my case, a mum sticking by her son).
I also agree with Daffodil that perhaps she's giving you an 'out' - I have said something similar to my daughter about her brother, that I would understand if she chose not to stand by him. I thought it was an important thing to say.
I also agree with Daffodil that perhaps she's giving you an 'out' - I have said something similar to my daughter about her brother, that I would understand if she chose not to stand by him. I thought it was an important thing to say.
I understand your comments Lola and how your views change when plunged into this world.
I've always said I respect others 'take' on our situation, I can wholly see their side.
it's an extremely hard place to be isn't it?
I've always said I respect others 'take' on our situation, I can wholly see their side.
it's an extremely hard place to be isn't it?
Smile, such a hard place to be - supporting someone we love through something so difficult. Big hugs as always xx