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I just can’t do this anymore

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Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 2:20pmReport post

Sat here shaking crying and being physically sick-I just can't do this anymore

Life feels over

Member since
September 2022

412 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 2:37pmReport post

Please call someone x

Life feels over

Member since
September 2022

412 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 2:38pmReport post

Or talk here. I'm here x

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 2:43pmReport post

Seaside. We all understand that this is a nightmare journey that never seems to end.

You might not feel strong enough right now so take the time to process and let your emotions out. Try to remember that as hard as it is right now, it is not forever.

There are lots of mental support groups for both you and your son.

You have come this far, that means you are strong and your strength will come back x

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 3:16pmReport post

Seaside

Please reach out on here for support

We are all here for you xxx

Contact your GP

You have come this far and no matter how tough this is you will get through it

Dont let this get the better of you please xx

loulou74

Member since
September 2022

255 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 3:30pmReport post

Seaside, you can my lovely, and you will. Things will get better. Make sure you speak to someone. Everything can seem impossible and bleak when you are feeling at your lowest but remember this is temporary. One step at a time you will reach out of that pit and see the blue sky.

Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 4:24pmReport post

Seaside. We are all here for you. Please reach out to gp and get some help. You are not alone in this. Us on this forum together are a close club that no one wants to be in but are so so close please don't be alone xxxx

Polly Pocket

Member since
May 2022

440 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 6:20pmReport post

Stay strong Seaside. You have come this far and you can do the rest..

Sending you lots of love.

Mind over matter...mind over matter... do something to distract you and then do the next right thing.xxx

K4

Member since
October 2022

608 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 6:52pmReport post

Hugs to you Seaside xxx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 7:08pmReport post

Bless you Seaside - we've all felt how you are feeling right now and it's bloody horrible. I use to sob every time I was on my own and when I went to bed / my body was in real pain too. Quite often I have a cry now as I miss my son SO very much.

You have us here for you, I managed those days without seeking help but please reach out don't suffer in silence x hugs sent my friend xxxxxx

Newlady

Member since
April 2021

644 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 7:09pmReport post

Seaside, you're allowed to fall apart sometimes you've been a pillar of strength to your son but whhos giving uou strength? Be kind to yourself. Allow yourself a bad day of. Crying and wallowing. Believe me I know I've had many and am still having them but. Once I let it out I. Feel better the next day. Speak to someone ASAP. You don't have to be alone xx

Mandymoo

Member since
September 2021

292 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 8:08pmReport post

Smile through tears - you are one bloody strong woman coping with everything with no outside help.



seaside - so many times I have had days like you have today. Cry all your tears today and tomorrow wake up feeling strong again. I know we can't but I wish we could all meet in person to support each other on days like this when no one else understands what we are going through xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 4:16amReport post

Thankyou Mandymoo - my strength comes from the deep love I have for my son. I'm absolutely furious with him - he's devastated our lives. But the love has never faltered (which many wouldn't understand).

I have gone against my family as I secretly keep in touch with him - I know he's not what people perceive and my strength is having that mental fight in my head. I know I am right.

Not easy tho -- a shocking journey for everyone whose caught up in it. Xxxxx

Edited Mon February 6, 2023 4:19am

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 8:38amReport post

Seaside, I can't read and not respond, please be kind to yourself, allow yourself to feel however you want to. I can honestly say that over time the days do get better and happier, after many months/years of crying at least once a day, I found I no longer felt I needed to, and am now very comfortable in letting my emotions out whenever I need to, and I feel the benefits form doing so.
it's one thing I learnt from my ex, keeping emotions in and hidden is not healthy, that's what he did and he got himself into this mess! Xxx

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 8:53amReport post

Seaside,

Please let us know you're okay. Is there anything we can do to help? We can't put personal stuff on here but some of us are on Mumsnet so can speak through there.

Sending love xx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 12:41pmReport post

Morning Seaside

Just wanted to check in on you xx

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:09pmReport post

Thank you for all your messages.

I'm reeling today because my son texted the Visor to ask whether he had actually gone into his employer on Friday and if so who he had spoken to as the store manager was on leave that day.

He then got a phone call from the visor to say that yes he had gone in and that he had spoken to the duty manager.

When my son pointed out that this was not the store manager and that now 2 people knew the situation the thug totally disregarded him and kept talking over him.

My son then politely asked if he could be allowed to speak and was told that the visor didn't like his tone and he wasn't doing himself any favours by questioning him.

The implicit threat was that he would make life more difficult.

He was also told that he is an offender and therefore has to be compliant with whatever is said or done.

I am speechless now but this is just so so wrong however if we complain it is going to get worse.

I really can't live like this for the next 5 years.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:09pmReport post

Thank you for all your messages.

I'm reeling today because my son texted the Visor to ask whether he had actually gone into his employer on Friday and if so who he had spoken to as the store manager was on leave that day.

He then got a phone call from the visor to say that yes he had gone in and that he had spoken to the duty manager.

When my son pointed out that this was not the store manager and that now 2 people knew the situation the thug totally disregarded him and kept talking over him.

My son then politely asked if he could be allowed to speak and was told that the visor didn't like his tone and he wasn't doing himself any favours by questioning him.

The implicit threat was that he would make life more difficult.

He was also told that he is an offender and therefore has to be compliant with whatever is said or done.

I am speechless now but this is just so so wrong however if we complain it is going to get worse.

I really can't live like this for the next 5 years.

Alison20

Member since
March 2021

361 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:43pmReport post

Hello Seaside

I am at a loss for words as to the response your son has received from VISOR today. I think we can all safely say that this is a person that no one on here would like to be dealing with.

I think your son and you need to speak to UNLOCK and or NACRO for support and strategies that you can use going forward. They maybe able to signpost you to other organisations that maybe able to help, if they are unable to.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:47pmReport post

Allison we are on the phone to Unlock now

Alison20

Member since
March 2021

361 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:53pmReport post

I really hope UNLOCK are able to help you and your son.

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 3:54pmReport post

Aren't visor staff under the Police and therefore should adhere to code of conduct? They have no right to disclose unnecessarily and need to be held accountable. It's one thing to disclose because they see a genuine concern but another to throw their weight around as it could put your son in danger. Once you've spoken to Unlock I would consult a solicitor, they are bang out of order! It's bordering harrassment if you ask me.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 4:08pmReport post

We are speaking to unlock and also to our solicitor this thug needs to be held accountable

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 4:16pmReport post

Hi Seaside

How disgusting I hope Unlock have been able to advise on how you can resolve this

Totally unacceptable behaviour by them

Hugs sent xx

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 5:46pmReport post

Spoke to Unlock who were very helpful and sympathetic but as they said unfortunately this guy appears to have a god complex and is bringing his own prejudices to his role.

We could complain but that would just make it more likely that he will visit more frequently.

Wrong as it is I think that we will just have to bear this but when he next visits we make it perfectly clear that we are not going to be pushed around or bullied by him and that we are perfectly entitled to ask questions.

My son now doesn't feel comfortable being alone at home because as he says this thug could just come round and say whatever he feels like so we will make sure that either myself or my husband are there as witnesses at all times.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 6:29pmReport post

Hi Seaside

This has knocked you all for six again x

Will it always be the same visor?

Lola53

Member since
May 2021

269 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 6:44pmReport post

Seaside, just wanted to send you a big hug and say how sorry I am that you're going through this absolute s***. We're all here for you.

Can you discreetly record the thug next time he turns up? Would be useful to have a record of how he's behaving.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 6:49pmReport post

Lola we had the phone on speaker phone and I have written down what was said so we have it on record and I will certainly be recording any further conversations with him

Lola53

Member since
May 2021

269 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 6:58pmReport post

Excellent :-)

mjl73

Member since
August 2019

240 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 7:04pmReport post

Sorry to hear that your son's visor manager is being like this. It does seem like there are a few who have a god complex!



If this gives you some hope, my husband is now on his 3rd visor manager in just over 3 years. They don't seem to stay in the role for that long here, might have something to do with the huge number they are managing. Hopefully, that person will move on and your son will be assigned a new manager who is a lot better.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 7:56pmReport post

Thanks mjl that's very interesting.

I'm interested to know what rights I actually have regarding this as his Mother ( he lives with us)can I refuse him entry if he comes round when my son is not at home ?

If I am at home when he comes here then I'm dammed if he's going to address me by my first name it will be Mrs Surname to him he's not my friend and as far as I'm concerned he can stand up the whole time as I don't want my furniture tainted by him

Maij

Member since
December 2020

287 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 7:12amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Fri June 30, 2023 1:09am

Maij

Member since
December 2020

287 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 7:12amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Tue February 7, 2023 7:12am

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 8:13amReport post

I just wanted to add that any recordings should be fine if you're doing them but Xxx's partner got into big trouble for recording his meetings from what I remember so make sure your son doesn't do it on his phone xx

mjl73

Member since
August 2019

240 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 3:08pmReport post

From what I have read, your son should not prevent them from access. If he does, then they have grounds to get an warrant for access. I'm not sure what would happen if you prevented access, but I suspect that it's likely to end up causing more problems for your son.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 3:13pmReport post

Mjl no we won't ever deny them access I realise that they can basically come round whenever they want to but if I'm in the house on my own then I'm assuming that I can refuse because my son isn't there?

SoTired

Member since
March 2021

387 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 11:23pmReport post

I've made the decision today to take the day off work for my mental well-being. And I feel guilty but also not. I am also going to stay off tomorrow as I'm in a place where the slightest thing makes my face leak, am going bald again with patches of hair fall out but have decided to cut a fringe in today to hide it and I reckon, I look disguised (?) as a result? When you tell people to plug their chairs in at the end of a lesson and add more confusion to a lssson, it's a sure sign mg brain needs a rest

I guess my message is, sometimes self care has to take priority and the needs of the world can wait. You only get one you.



hope you're feeling a little better. Excuse the appalling grammar

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 11:30pmReport post

So Tired please make sure you look after yourself.

Sending you lots of love and hugs x

SoTired

Member since
March 2021

387 posts

Posted Tue February 7, 2023 11:35pmReport post

We can do this, you know. Crying is cathartic or at least that's what my puffy face tells me haha (wry humour)

thank you for your reply x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Wed February 8, 2023 3:56amReport post

Seaside/SoTied - Life is surly pretty grim for you at the moment with many problems but ride those waters of tears / life will get better, not perfect, but better.

Big hug sent to anyone feeling sad today xxxxxxxx

Edited Wed February 8, 2023 3:59am