Family and Friends Forum

Life feels over

Member since
September 2022

412 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 2:37pmReport post

Just had a call from prison which straight away made me panic as it's the weekend. It was a prison officer saying he had my Husband there to speak to me. More panic. Husband then asks me if I'm sitting down. More panic. In short, gym, ambulance, hospital, stents fitted to heart now back in prison in the hospital. WTF!! Why did no one contact me? Just because they are prison no one calls? What if he'd died?? I'm beside myself. I know I say I'm strong but seriously I can't cope with worrying if he's dead or alive on top of everything else.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 3:23pmReport post

Omg Life

How awful I cant imagine how you are feeling

Surely the prison should have called sooner, again something else that causes more worry xx

Glad he is ok but shocked at how you have only just been told

Sending hugs xx

loulou74

Member since
September 2022

255 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 3:27pmReport post

That must have been a huge shock for you. I can't believe they didn't let you know he'd been taken to hospital.

Polly Pocket

Member since
May 2022

440 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 6:21pmReport post

That really is too much.. I'm sorry this has happened. X

K4

Member since
October 2022

608 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 6:51pmReport post

Oh gosh, this is so awful. What rights do you have in this instance??



so glad husband is ok, but your poor nerves must be shot.

thinking of you



xx

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 7:01pmReport post

Oh my goodness I have just read this and can't believe that you weren't informed .

Thinking of you and sending you love xx

Newlady

Member since
April 2021

644 posts

Posted Sun February 5, 2023 7:12pmReport post

Hope he's OK, that's terrible noone. Informed you. He's a human being fur goodness sake! Anyway big hugs xx

Life feels over

Member since
September 2022

412 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 6:17amReport post

Thank you for your replies. This journey certainly tests our strength. Just as the initial knock wasn't expected neither was this. Today was supposed to be my first visit but it's now not possible for this to go ahead. He's awaiting some more checks on his heart before they move him back to the wing. It seems this whole event has broken both our hearts xx

Xxx

Member since
March 2022

439 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 7:26amReport post

Hope he's okay . And your okay ? Sending love xxx

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 8:32amReport post

I'm so sorry for what you have gone through, it is heartbreaking. Sadly, I eastablished, when my ex was in prison, that prison would not inform me as his next of kin of illness or hospitalisation. You are kept in the dark until the patient themself is able to contact you. With hospital visits/stays there is a security issue, and they need to ensure that no plans can be made for escape. I was also told that on death, I would not be necessarily be immediately informed as his next of kin, particularly if it is at a weekend. This was a huge shock to me.
It's not what anyone wants to hear I'm sure, and shows me, again, how prison is dehumanising, and again, how the families and loved ones are punished too.
My ex refused hospital treatment, was a scan, as he didn't want to be in handcuffs, again, something that seems extreme and degrading, when dealing with someone who is not aggressive or at risk of flight, but then I guess how are the prison officers to know?

Its a tough journey in all ways, and I'm pleased the prison part is now over.

Take care everyone xxxx

Life feels over

Member since
September 2022

412 posts

Posted Mon February 6, 2023 5:21pmReport post

He must have a nice prison warden as he's allowed him to use his phone to ring me and let me know he's ok. Still awaiting an echocardiogram as the paperwork went missing and they are trying to stabilise his meds.

xx