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Daughters mental health

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Annamarie

Member since
December 2021

74 posts

Posted Fri February 10, 2023 10:04amReport post

Apoliges for the long post. ????*** This is about self harming.

Our 1st knock came 13 months ago. At that time my daughter was 19. She had had several years struggling with depression, anxiety and anger. I had at that point recently discovered that she had self harmed quite significantly on her thighs but had stopped a couple of months previously. She handled it like most teenagers and didn't want to talk about it.

When the knock came, it was (thank god) a surprise to her that her father was being accused of talking about sexually abusing child online. She was in shock and was only concerned about me.

The next morning she had yellow bruising on her temples. She eventually told me she had hit her head against the wall till she passed out.

After that I checked with her if she felt like doing any of that and she had some therapy online. She stopped that and we seemed to muddle through. My husband had not returned to our home but we did see him. I was thinking about being back together.

I had a phone call 2 weeks ago to inform me that he had been arrested again because of an offence 4 months ago.

Yesterday my daughter had a very large plaster on the inside of her wrist. When I questioned her she claimed up and got angry. I know she did this to herself. What so I do?!

Lucy from Stop it Now!

Member since
September 2018

496 posts

Posted Fri February 10, 2023 4:50pmReport post

Dear Annamarie,

Thank you for contributing on our Family and Friends Forum!

We would also like to thank you for being open about the issue around your daughter’s self-harm, which we can imagine must have been very difficult to write about. Whilst we are not experts in this area, we would like to share some information about self-harming and where to access some support for individuals who are struggling with this. We hope that you and other individuals who are experiencing this will find it helpful.

People might self-harm for many different reasons, often as a way of dealing with difficult feelings. You mentioned that your daughter has been struggling with depression, anxiety and anger for several years. We would like to praise you for your efforts and for giving her the opportunity to speak to a therapist online.

We understand how difficult these situations can be. For this reason, I would encourage you to pass on our helpline details to your daughter so that we can also support her in how she is feeling.

I am wondering how you are coping at the moment? It is important that you look after yourself during this difficult time and that you prioritise your own self-care. You and your daughter might benefit from reaching out to your GP to discuss how you are doing, as they might have support services available for both of you.

We know that many individuals who self-harm do so as a way to share their feelings without saying them out loud, to distract themselves from difficult feelings or to cope. Of course, there are also many other reasons. There are some useful organisations that you may wish to refer to for further support, such as Alumina (Previously known as ‘Selfharm’) which is an online support service and group for 11-19-year-olds who struggle with self-harm. There is also information and support available via NHS and Young Minds, which you might wish to pass onto your daughter for support.

We would also encourage you to contact our helpline if you need someone to talk to. Whilst we are not experts around self-harm, we can act as a listening ear and talk through some of the difficult feelings that you might be experiencing.

We know that self-harming can affect anyone and that you are not alone going through this. We hope that others in a similar situation as yourself decide to reach out to you soon for further support.


Please take good care of yourselves!

Lucy

Edited Fri February 10, 2023 4:51pm

Annamarie

Member since
December 2021

74 posts

Posted Sat February 11, 2023 6:44pmReport post

Thank you for that response. I really appreciate the support of my daughter and myself. I just neednto get it all out. Those are very useful links.



Thank you

Xx

SoTired

Member since
March 2021

387 posts

Posted Thu February 16, 2023 10:49pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Tue March 7, 2023 11:03pm

Annamarie

Member since
December 2021

74 posts

Posted Sat February 18, 2023 8:54pmReport post

SoTired

Thank you so much.

Big hug x