Family and Friends Forum

Hi wild, sending hugs to you. Look after yourself and have self care.

do you mind if I ask what the charge/sentence was?

Theres a few ladies on here, especially mums who will be able to advise you on the prison system/visits/contact etc, from what I've read their people are doing ok and are safe in prison on a certain wing.
x

Hi Wild,

So can't be any help, but sending love and hugs to u xx

Wildflower I'm sorry you find yourself here, as you say no one can prepare you for this. We very much expected custodial, but it still hit hard when I found the outcome. The first few days are very hard, there are a few of us on here that can offer support and advise re prision.

I want to reassure you that whilst he will have done adjusting to do, he will be safe and will be put in the vulnerable prison section. Many recieve a phone call within a couple of days from their person (we didn't - It took about a week). He is likely to have gone to a local prison first, if this prision houses sex offenders then he may stsy there, if not he might be moved.

You phone number will need to be authorised, so you may recieve a phone call from the prison before you hear from him.

These first days and weeks see hard, but after a while it settled down you and they find a new rhythm.

Wildflower - you will be fraught at first, it's horrible as you fear for their safety. You hear and read some horrible things (don't believe it)!

Just let me reassure you safeguarding is paramount and your person will be looked after. His mental health will be assessed and he will be assigned a mentor (which is usually another prisoner) for support.

My son was sent to our local prison but was quickly moved to a sex offender prison. He says no one discusses their crime and he has never felt intimidated by anyone. So please please try not to worry. I'm sure your call will happen quickly as they encourage keeping up family ties.

I hope this reassures you, please post if you have any more concerns, we've been through it and will do our best to support you x

Morning Wildflower2022

So sorry you are here x

I just was to reassure you that he will be ok and safe , of course he will be totally overwhelmed but that is normal

My son is in prison, and like you I was all over the place with crying, not knowing, the constant worry, he was also struggling

Once your number is approved he will be able to call you

Please be kind to yourself and I hope you have others around to support you xx

We are here for you xx

Wildflower2022

So glad you have been able to talk to him

Hope you are ok x

As said before we are here for you xx

@wildflower I too am so sorry you are experiencing this turmoil and so happy you have been able to speak to your husband. We were not expecting a custodial sentence but my husband was given one. We are in the first month of adjustment. The shock is all consuming and leaves you numb and feeling completely overwhelmed but you do settle into your new temporary normal. There are days and moments where the steamroller of emotion hits you face on and takes your breath away but it does pass. The support from my virtual sisters on this forum has been invaluable.

I mirror everything said before me regarding safety. I am yet to visit my husband as he suffered a heart attack recently and had medical intervention in hospital to fit stents. He has been well cared for and I've been able to check on his welfare when my anxiety took over. I'm preparing for my own heartache when I do visit as the reality of everything that has happened over the last few weeks will become raw all over again; but this too will become temporarily normal.

I miss my husband desperately and have never felt so alone but it isn't forever. I have realised how strong I am. You will too xx

I'm so so sorry, I've no advice just hugs and I hope it gets easier for you. We are here for you xx

@wildflower sending you strength x

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