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Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 4:21pmReport post

Afternoon Lovely's

Just wanted to check in and see how you all are xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2538 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 7:32pmReport post

Me fine - had a lovely time with my grandchildren today x

Newlady

Member since
April 2021

644 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 7:59pmReport post

On a bit of a downer today, missing my person like crazy but I know he's OK. The heart break is almost as bad as the knock, but I'm getting there. Xhowcare you

Christmas Chaos

Member since
May 2022

131 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 9:50pmReport post

Hope everyone is doing ok. Found it hard with it being Valentines. I just started emptying my husbands flat today as I am handing back his keys to his landlord at the end of the month due to his custodial. Trying to tell myself it's just another day but I definitely felt down. Even a bit jealous of other happy couples. I hope I can celebrate Valentines in the future, and I'll appreciate getting flowers and a card more!!

Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 9:53pmReport post

Hi Upset,

how are you?
I've had a few moments today, being Valentine's Day and I couldn't even bring myself to buy my partner a card. I could see his hurt when he gave me a card and I didn't get him one, even though he tried to hide it. I know it doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things but we always bought each other a card. I just want to scream you did this to us!
but tomorrow is a new day and I will roll with it x

hpl111

Member since
November 2022

390 posts

Posted Tue February 14, 2023 10:52pmReport post

Doing okay. Work was good today and we are sorting a nursery out for the kids at the moment. My husband brought me flowers and chocolates for valentine's day, which was sweet.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 7:29amReport post

Morning Ladies sending hugs to you all xx

Smile glad you had a lovely day with your grandchildren xx

Newlady, Christmas, Jayjay, Hpl

So sorry your all feeling a bit low today it's a tough journey to be on but you are all incredibly strong huge virtual hugs xx

Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 9:50amReport post

Good morning ladies.. I'm having a particularly bad day today, really struggling to even look at my son let alone have a conversation with him and it's tearing me apart. All I can see for our future is doom and gloom and a miserable existence, so what's the point xxx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 2:42pmReport post

Hi Kt

You are allowed to have down days and have these feelings as at the moment it's so hard to see beyond this but you will get through this

I know how difficult this journey is as do we all but it will not beat you

Not much advise I know but we are all here for you, sending hugs xx

Alison20

Member since
March 2021

361 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 3:23pmReport post

Hello Kt

As Upset Mum has said you are allowed to have bad days in this journey. The fluctutions in how you are feeling and how you are coping are very common in this process for many of us. Try to be kind to yourself and take the best care of yourself that you can - this may help to deal with the bad days the best you can in the long run.

Thinking of you and your son x

Edited Wed February 15, 2023 3:26pm

Kt

Member since
January 2023

180 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 3:56pmReport post

Upset and Alison...thank you very much, it's such a horrible gut renching feeling isn't it. If I have a good day (as good as they can be anyway) or if I laugh and find myself enjoying my day with friends or family, who have been such great support for us, I almost feel guilty for it. The waiting and the fear of the unknown is a killer xxx

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

436 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 5:15pmReport post

I just feel numb. I felt numb after the knock, then angry but i have gone back to being numb. Feel no joy nor sadness. We have always made a big deal of valentines. But nothing much yesterday. But OH does not make a effort as he feels he does not deserve anything. Result is i feel i do all the work. He just thinks that he has no right to show any affection. But it is making my life sad. I feel we are co existing.



sorry to be so negative.

Edited Wed February 15, 2023 5:16pm

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 5:47pmReport post

Hi Webb89

Never apologise for sharing your feelings on here , we are all here and fully understand how you are feeling x

It's a journey like no other, and can be an extremely lonely place to be sometimes but we are here for you xx

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 6:24pmReport post

Hi

We had a lovely meal out for valentines. It felt like a first date. We laughed so much and there was no mention of our "troubles". It reminded me of who I fell in love with.

Then we had a flaming row this morning because I'm struggling with intimacy since this all happened. A reminder that we still have work to do.

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 7:19pmReport post

Evening Confused&worried

Glad you had a lovely meal and sorry this morning brought it down with an argument

The reality of it all but working at it to try to re build has to be done at your pace and what is right for you, xx

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

436 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 9:25pmReport post

Thank you upset mum for your kind words.



I am sorry confused that you had an awful morning, such a pity after your lovely meal. I have not done anything with my OH since it happened. I am too scared to go with him in case i bump into some one i know. I am having therapy as i am very hung up on what other people think. When it is me living this life not them.

Edited Wed February 15, 2023 9:26pm