Family and Friends Forum

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 10:45amReport post

Hi,

I don't post often as I'm worried about identifying information.

My house sale has just fallen through (been trying to sell for 6 months) the buyers found out about oh's offence & pulled out.

Wouldn't be such a big deal but I've had continual harassment from neighbours after it appeared in the local media.police have been involved etc so I've been desperate to move.

I'm worried about my little one starting school here & being made an outcast.

Has anyone successfully got their children in an out of area school because of their partners offence? I have him in an out of area childminder at the minute but definitely don't want my lo to go school here.

Any help appreciated because I just feel so low right now :(

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

558 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 12:38pmReport post

Hi Bluebell,

I don't know where you're located but yes you definitely can get your little one into a school outside your local area.

The best thing to do would be to contact the Education Authority and the Headteacher of the school you have in mind and explain ( without going into too much detail)that due to changes in family circumstances you don't want your child to attend the local school and that you are planning on moving to the area ( even if this is not the case) and would him/ her to start school there so that there is less disruption.

I used to work in Education and this was a fairly common occurrence.

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 12:59pmReport post

Thank you so much

The last thing I want is my little one to receive backlash over this.

Thank you for taking the time to reply that's very helpful xxx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 2:30pmReport post

Afternoon Bluebell77

Not much advise but just wanted to let you know I'm sorry for the issues you have had trying to sell your house, I know some new builds allow you to exchange your property not sure where you are but worth looking in to x

As Seaside mentioned you should be able to apply for a school outside your area so definitely worth looking in to this also xx

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 6:18pmReport post

Thank you very much for your help upset mum. It's nice to not feel quite so alone in all this xxx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 7:21pmReport post

Bluebell77

You will never be on your own here it's what we are all here for, help, advice and genuine empathy and understanding xx

ShatteredWorld

Member since
September 2022

19 posts

Posted Wed February 15, 2023 9:29pmReport post

Bluebell77, I am so sorry to hear what is happening to you and your little one. It is so on fair that those who didn't do the crime get the harrassment from others... what if this happened to them because as sad as it is it can happen to anyone :( I hope you and your little one find a place soon and a new lovely school to start fresh.

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Fri February 17, 2023 7:36pmReport post

Thank you. I'm just so exhausted by it all :(

I haven't got it in me to put it on the market again just yet.

I don't post often as I'm so scared my posts will identify me :(

It's been so hard dealing with the knock, my mum died 8 weeks prior to the knock, she was my rock & we were so close. There's only one family member who agrees with my decision to stay with my other half. Alot of my friends won't speak to me & have effectively disowned me.

I had my baby 2 days after sentancing & then it hit the media. With all the harassment from the neighbours & raising our child at the same time it has been so incredibly hard. Each incident with the neighbours has just added to the resentment I feel. We have marriage counselling with circles but it's incredibly hard to move forward when your constantly being reminded about the offence.

I'm just so worried about the impact it will have on my little one :( I have such bad anxiety I can't sleep at night.

Thank you for all of your replies. It means alot xxx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2385 posts

Posted Fri February 17, 2023 7:47pmReport post

Evening Bluebell77,

I am so sorry to hear your mum passed away shortly before this, that in itself is hard to apprehend never mind finding your self here

Please seek help from your gp and reach out to us here

We all share the same journey just different stages and different circumstances , my son is the offender so my feelings are different but the emotions are the same

Sending hugs and strength to you xx

Wildflower2022

Member since
December 2022

27 posts

Posted Fri February 17, 2023 8:35pmReport post

Hi Bluebell,



i just wanted to say a huge hug to you. I have a lot of empathy and understanding - I too have a young child who was born in the midst of all of this + media attention - I understand how incredibly hard things can be.

im so sorry about your mum. You sound like you've been through hell and back since the knock but you sound strong, even if you you don't feel it at the moment.

Take some time for you, a little bit of self care. You cannot pour from an empty cup lovely. I know it's not easy with a young child though. Please don't panic/try not to worry too much until you've contacted the education authority (what great advice from seaside :) )



take care

wildflower x