Family and Friends Forum

Scared and confused

Member since
February 2023

9 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 8:04pmReport post

Why is there no support for those impacted?

Its been a week and no one has contacted me to see how me and my children are?

Its like we don't matter and I am expected just to deal with everything and explain to my children what's going on. Like this is something to that everyone deals with every day!

He is getting all the support in the world and yet literally no one has spoken to me since I picked him up from bail and he moved out.
It's ridiculous, my life has been turned upside down and it's feels like it's off you go love it's your fault for him doing what he has done.

Just feeling frustrated.

Mini rant over. Thank you.

GZ

Member since
December 2021

164 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 8:16pmReport post

I completely agree, the system is shit.

There is a support group called talkingforward, it is run by SaferLives who help the men. Reach out to them, this has been a lifeline for me

K4

Member since
October 2022

608 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 8:53pmReport post

It's a mess, isn't it. The worst part I have found is that the police treat me as if I'm an offender too.



sorry you're having a shit time.



solidarity xxx

EllBee

Member since
April 2022

139 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 9:53pmReport post

Completely agree, it's properly sh!t

There are courses you can sign up to, with Lucy Faithful (stop it now) which you have obviously already found, but also Stopso who I found really helpful and I met some really lovely people on my course who I am still in touch with now. That helped me so much and still does. Hang in there, the first few weeks are the worst, it does get easier X

ataloss

Member since
September 2022

45 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 10:30pmReport post

You're so right. No one has checked in on my person's family (wife/kids) since his imprisonment. I feel like the system is completely broken.

Summer

Member since
July 2019

394 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 10:53pmReport post

I totally agree with you!



Knock to trial over 3.5 years did anyone check up on me in those years to see if I was ok or the children were ok??? Nope zero nada ziltch but then I tried to think of the positive at least they are leaving me alone as pretty sure after they will be back and be on my case. oh no 7 weeks since being found guilty and I haven't heard a dicky bird so glad they are there to safeguard the kids lol although he doesn't live here the address is on the SOR form surely someone could have phoned me to make sure I was aware of the outcome??
maybe when they do finally call/visit I shall act surprised like I never knew. It's not funny but I do find some of this a total joke!



sending huge hugs to you amazing strong ladies

Edited Tue February 21, 2023 10:53pm

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

436 posts

Posted Tue February 21, 2023 11:28pmReport post

I feel it too. Probabtion, councillors the police all checking he is ok and how he can move forward.



what about me? What about his children, though adults still is devastating?. No one asks am I ok? No one wants to know. Had a spot check visor visit today. Totally freaked me out to have police just turn up again, brought the knock all back. OH does not have that as he was arrested at work. I get dressed early every day in case the police just show up again and i am not dressed like it was at the knock. It happened today and it freaked me out. Police asking him are you ok, how your coping etc. i was upstairs shaking and crying. No one asked me!

Edited Tue February 21, 2023 11:30pm