knock on Thursday; husband taken away, house searched, electrical items removed from property,
husband home same day, apparently chat room conversation where he sent 2 illicit pics of himself to an underage girl, he has not received/asked for any pics as far as I’m aware at this point.
im numb, don’t know what to think, 30yrs together and nothing like this has ever happened before.
my iPad was returned today.
husband home same day, apparently chat room conversation where he sent 2 illicit pics of himself to an underage girl, he has not received/asked for any pics as far as I’m aware at this point.
im numb, don’t know what to think, 30yrs together and nothing like this has ever happened before.
my iPad was returned today.
Hi Staffy
Welcome to the group no one wants to be in, you will find nothing but support and friendship on here's. Please listen to O&U wise words, definitely ring the helpline and maybe even just see your GP, bit necessarily to get pills but just so you are on their horizon.
The shock of this will be with you for a while, you will go through emotions you never knew you had in you but the biggest piece of advice I can give you I'd self care, make sure this isn't just about him but that your also get help and support.
Keep coming on here, read the posts, we are all at such different stages but I will guarantee they will all resonate with you and it helps knowing you're not on your own
Take care xx
Welcome to the group no one wants to be in, you will find nothing but support and friendship on here's. Please listen to O&U wise words, definitely ring the helpline and maybe even just see your GP, bit necessarily to get pills but just so you are on their horizon.
The shock of this will be with you for a while, you will go through emotions you never knew you had in you but the biggest piece of advice I can give you I'd self care, make sure this isn't just about him but that your also get help and support.
Keep coming on here, read the posts, we are all at such different stages but I will guarantee they will all resonate with you and it helps knowing you're not on your own
Take care xx
Thank you for your replies, it helps to know there is help out there. Just taking each day a step at a time.
So today after he left for work I cleaned everything the police had touched, forgive my posting, the clean was a therapy for me, I’m in limbo, he’s still living here, I don’t understand my own feelings let alone his. I’m angry I’m hurt I’m disgusted but is it normal to still love him ?.and not want to see him cause himself any harm,?I have no children in the house, but grandchildren who we see twice a year, I’ve had to inform my son that their grandad is not allowed unsupervised visits, the police let me tell him myself before they did, not a conversation I would wish on anyone, I’m so sorry for everyone on here who is going through this turmoil. Help and words are appreciated.
Hi there. Yes it is normal to be hurt and disgusted by what your husband has done yet still love him and care about his welfare. Especially after your 30 years together. There are many of us who go through these conflicts of emotion every day. If you can possibly afford it, I would suggest some counselling/therapy to help you process the shock and traumatic experience you are going through. (Don’t rely on NHS. 11 months and still waiting.)
We understand and are here for you.
Paula
We understand and are here for you.
Paula
Hi Paula
I think the NHS is different waiting times in different areas, I only had to wait 14 weeks and I'm now having counselling with relate which I have to say, at the moment it's really good. She's giving me things to think about and some coping strategies
Hope you get some help soon xx
I think the NHS is different waiting times in different areas, I only had to wait 14 weeks and I'm now having counselling with relate which I have to say, at the moment it's really good. She's giving me things to think about and some coping strategies
Hope you get some help soon xx
Hi all; so it’s now 7 weeks post knock.
what I’m struggling with is to find anyone else whose husband/partner has not downloaded images of children but who has sent a child a picture of himself sexually aroused. Also no sexual content to the chat messages that they had between each other, he just sent it! He not know why?
only sexual pics were of him sent to her.
angry yes of course I’m angry, but... I’m supporting him, with the help of a sexual councillor we are working through this nightmare: trying too at least.
Any advice/ similar situations would be appreciated
what I’m struggling with is to find anyone else whose husband/partner has not downloaded images of children but who has sent a child a picture of himself sexually aroused. Also no sexual content to the chat messages that they had between each other, he just sent it! He not know why?
only sexual pics were of him sent to her.
angry yes of course I’m angry, but... I’m supporting him, with the help of a sexual councillor we are working through this nightmare: trying too at least.
Any advice/ similar situations would be appreciated
Hi Staffy,
I'm coming up to 7 weeks post arrest as well. I'm feeling everything you are. I love him but I hate him for what he has done. I can't express my emotions, it's not like anything I have been through before and I have already been through one divorce due to my first husband having an affair. I have also lost both my parents, but this is just something else. The betrayal and hurt is so painful. I want to help and support him but I don't know who he is anymore, or more to the point who he ever was.
My mind is numb still sometimes. I find it hard to process stuff and that's a bit of a nightmare at work, but I had to tell my boss as I am a deputy manager at a pre school and the designated safeguarding lead, so my stomach really does churn with all this. I am still very confused and totally unsure of what the future holds for us.
I am so glad I am on this forum, everyone is so lovely and kind and of course understanding. I try and take one day at a time and not look to far ahead. 7 weeks in, we have a long way to go, but we can make this. Sending a hug your way. Xx
I'm coming up to 7 weeks post arrest as well. I'm feeling everything you are. I love him but I hate him for what he has done. I can't express my emotions, it's not like anything I have been through before and I have already been through one divorce due to my first husband having an affair. I have also lost both my parents, but this is just something else. The betrayal and hurt is so painful. I want to help and support him but I don't know who he is anymore, or more to the point who he ever was.
My mind is numb still sometimes. I find it hard to process stuff and that's a bit of a nightmare at work, but I had to tell my boss as I am a deputy manager at a pre school and the designated safeguarding lead, so my stomach really does churn with all this. I am still very confused and totally unsure of what the future holds for us.
I am so glad I am on this forum, everyone is so lovely and kind and of course understanding. I try and take one day at a time and not look to far ahead. 7 weeks in, we have a long way to go, but we can make this. Sending a hug your way. Xx