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Agoraphobia

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Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Thu March 30, 2023 5:06pmReport post

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Edited Fri May 5, 2023 12:33pm

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Thu March 30, 2023 6:24pmReport post

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Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Thu March 30, 2023 7:57pmReport post

Hi daffodil

honestly sounds like you have a form of acrophobia, check the symptoms online and see if they correlate.



hello Lee 2.0

heard a lot about you, all good I assure you (think I may have also read historical posts with your name on,not sure)

yes it was live streamed, my OH has now pled guilty due to not wanting to be on remand any longer and just wanting to get on with life. Whether that be prison or release.



im terrified of leaving my home for more than an hour if I manage to get a friend to go with me. I moved here just before covid so didn't really have a chance to make many friends and they have lives of their own. I have No family anywhere near here and have very little support. So if I were to go I would have to go on my own and have major panic attacks the last one lasted 3 hours and it felt like I was going to die. I don't want to set back my progress. It may not seem like much but I can leave my home but not go more than 5minutes away and I attend a baby group with my DS Because my friend also goes with me. Just the job centre contacting me telling me I had to go it caused me not to leave again for 5 days. It's not fair on my son but thankfully I have a garden that I can take him into.



what was the outcome with regards to your person if you don't mind me asking? Mine will be sentenced in about a week and I'm dreading it as I already know the vigianties will be posting about him again (5 time since October, they just won't leave it alone) when they find out the sentence, which will cause me to not want to go out again.



may I ask if you have children? If yes can your person see them? I'm just curious as I do have children and just wonder if ss will allow it after he's pled guilty

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2556 posts

Posted Thu March 30, 2023 9:23pmReport post

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Edited Sat April 1, 2023 8:18am

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Fri March 31, 2023 10:07pmReport post

Thank you for your reply Lee 2.0 my dyslexia went into overdrive not going to lie so I screenshot this and have to reply but by bit. Also apologies for not responding sooner but I needed time to respond properly.



I do have a therapist, and obviously use this group. We are a few sessions in so far and it's going ok, not pushy or anything just listens and responds to what she thinks and feels I'm saying. All in all best one so far (years of therapy under this belt of mine of various types) it's also quite funny because I say stuff before she say is it quite a bit and she feels saddened that I know so much. He had seen the evidence against him, I've seen some particularly the conversation itself, I wanted to see if he was telling me the truth which he was. Help whilst on remand is non existent there is a 28 week wait list to see a counsellor for example, so I managed to find a charity that went into prison to see him (veterans charity as he is one), they are working with him. What's a psr? So I have no idea about that. He is due to be sentenced Thursday and it's stressing me out more than it should. Oh and he was initially pleading not guilty but like your case he made a deal with cps so it's now guilty



I really appreciate you looking into the job centre stuff for me and it will be very helpful.



Well as for the vigilante group they are quite a well known group, unfortunately I keep watching their stings and screenshoting every time one of them are on camera, I've managed to get the name of at least two of them and know the address of their base of operations, I've also contacted the Sia about security personnel doing this type of thing (I've seen several with badges) as it's illegal activity and they are not meant to do that with an Sia licence (I have quite an extensive knowledge of that area, hopefully you can guess why). They have had no consideration for the families of the people they seek. No safeguarding in place safe "don't contact the family" said whilst they sting. My daughter has been accosted several times and she is only 13, the police have done nothing when I have reported it. So far it's been 5 times with the poster I'm expecting at least 7 as they also like to do a monthly poster of all the people they have stung in that month including updates etc. prize egotistical p***ks. When this is all done with him and I can get some funds together I am going after each and every one of them. I will try and get this made illegal save police or actual authorities doing it. There is no need to put it all online as it's the families that suffer most. There was and still is a group in my area that when it was all first announced discussions about mine and my families personal lives including where we lived etc. again police did nothing.



honestly still trying to work out how they got his address as he uses a vpn on his divices and where he was living it was all inclusive so no bills etc in his name and his mail came to my address and I passed it on, wasn't even via the electoral role. The only people who had that address where myself, him of course and the police. I'm still of the mind that the vigilante group used an officer to do a search.


ss we are on or will be on our 5th social worker since July, like you my child made a false allegation which was nfa x2 and she admitted it was a lie. Not that ss are taking the blindest bit of notice of that. 3 from November have told me to divorce (I don't believe in divorce so they can do one but keeps suggesting it anyway) one FSW called him a p word back in October when I finally managed to get contact for my DS prior to decoy arrest, before nfa and DD admittion of lie. The sw after his arrest for decoy said thet OH had failed the risk assessment for contact yet they are the ones who allowed it, odd no?! They wouldn't allow me to supervise for various reasons, each sw made up their own reason with no proof. Each different. I have to keep my communication with him minimal as I don't want ss to know I talk to him as they will just use that against me in the long run. I'm getting a judicial separation just to appease them (I still haven't made up my mind on the relationship and am unable to do so clearly until they stop breathing down my neck)

initially we were put on nic in July for the allegations, then nfa came through and my OH was arrested for the decoy two days later so was put on Cpp from November. There is a post on here saying "oh I screwed up" which explains latest crap from social services and it's all becoming to much. The OIC we had initially was very much against him and didn't believe my DD when she said she lied and thinks I may have had a part to play in all that confession, hence it was reopened for a second time and again nfa. I didnt even talk to my DD about the allegations at all since she made them because I had my doubts which my DD didn't know about. Things just were not adding up, I won't go into details but a mother knows or at least had suspicions of when her child is lying, they don't tell the child and they investigate on their own.



I really really hope that all goes in your favour when it comes to the social services, sounds like you were lucky where as I am seen as a villian, I must to parenting courses due to one single slap I gave her 4 days before she made the accusation against my OH and myself at school. It was a Saturday I slapped her and he shouted at her, it was a Tuesday when she went in and did the damage.



so sorry that my post was so long

Edited Fri March 31, 2023 10:20pm

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Fri March 31, 2023 10:12pmReport post

Dear smile,

same here just not going to list it all as it would be longer than my leg if I wrote really small.



it's a bit difficult not to take it all on at once and I'm doing as well as I can atm I have good days and bad ones, but adding pressure to it doesn't help.



I hope you are getting some help of your own and wish you all the best of course, we don't deserve to be here but I for one am so thankful for this forum.

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Sat April 1, 2023 5:40amReport post

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Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Sat April 1, 2023 8:39amReport post

Hi daffodil,

at first couldn't find the bit about uploading a fit note, I have found it now and filled it in. Thank you for letting me know letting me know that it was there I had no idea and they certainly didn't tell me. Would be useful if they had a take a photo and send it part.



I would definitely say that most of the people on here probably have PTSD as the knock is considered a one off, even with the ongoing stuff that comes with this it's not considered ongoing trauma as the knock doesn't keep happening. I have been diagnosed with CPTSD but thet stems from childhood trauma and this stuff had exasibated the initial issues, same with the agoraphobia (GAD general anxiety disorder) I do have a therapist and doctors giving me medication. Although I do also suffer from depression I refuse to go on medication for that as previously it made me worse or like a zombie neither of which are good.

If you feel like you have any of the issues I have spoken about please seek medical assistance and don't keep it to yourself. There is no weakness in admitting there is an issue. If anything it takes great strength xxxx

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Sun April 2, 2023 5:38pmReport post

Ah yes, he's just had that done, sorry just didn't know what the short version was lol.

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

251 posts

Posted Tue April 4, 2023 8:43pmReport post

Good news after a lot of palava I managed to call my doctor who immediately issued me a fit note, it was a bit of an issue to get it though because it meant I had no choice but to go and get it, thankfully my doctor is within my 5minutes from home zone (if you have ever had agoraphobia you will understand that part) and my daughter DD went with me.



I managed to work out the upload the dates onto the universal credit website, but they still wanted the fit note to be shown so my DD delivered it to them for me today.



got a bit confused as the fit note has been signed until the end of may but they have now said they will contact me in two weeks via telephone therefore they cancelled the inperson appointment. I have also now received the PIP paperwork so just need to work out how to fill that out, when I applied I even said to them I don't care about the money aspect I just need proof that I am going through mental health issues and don't need people breathing down my neck all the time. Essentially people to sit up and take note.



very relieved though it caused a lot of undue stress and panic attacks, thank you all that helped me to figure things out particularly Lee 2.0