No SHPO, SOR restrictions
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Hi,
partner got suspended sentence in 2022, no contact restrictions on SHPO. But I'm finding the SOR/visor contradictory and not clear.
so SOR states you only need to tell them if you are spending 7 days + at a different address/holiday, so why is the visor saying he needs to tell them even if we go away for a weekend for their records, he doesn't need to go to police station to register it, he just needs to let them both know. On a recent weekend away in a quiet lodge, they said they would ring the local police force to advise that he was staying in the area for 3 nights! Why?! I just think if an offence happened in the area whilst there, it's very easy for them to blame him.
or is it because we have children and it states 12+ hours with a child, but then again it's not an official notification it's letting the visor know. (Also no CPP and can have unsupervised contact our own kids only.
any advice this please?
also I'm struggling to find a caravan/lodge holiday for summer that does not have restrictions in the t&c about SOR. Some say they don't 'knowingly allow S/O' does this mean if we don't tell them it's ok! and some say 'we don't allow anyone on SOR' unsure why the wording difference. Any tips ? X
partner got suspended sentence in 2022, no contact restrictions on SHPO. But I'm finding the SOR/visor contradictory and not clear.
so SOR states you only need to tell them if you are spending 7 days + at a different address/holiday, so why is the visor saying he needs to tell them even if we go away for a weekend for their records, he doesn't need to go to police station to register it, he just needs to let them both know. On a recent weekend away in a quiet lodge, they said they would ring the local police force to advise that he was staying in the area for 3 nights! Why?! I just think if an offence happened in the area whilst there, it's very easy for them to blame him.
or is it because we have children and it states 12+ hours with a child, but then again it's not an official notification it's letting the visor know. (Also no CPP and can have unsupervised contact our own kids only.
any advice this please?
also I'm struggling to find a caravan/lodge holiday for summer that does not have restrictions in the t&c about SOR. Some say they don't 'knowingly allow S/O' does this mean if we don't tell them it's ok! and some say 'we don't allow anyone on SOR' unsure why the wording difference. Any tips ? X
We are currently on the same process. We go away the weekend and have had to notify them of a different address for his record and she stated that if it's for 7 or more nights he has to go in to tell them. We are currently at the end of a phased return home and still not allowed unsupervised so I was hoping it was because of that but maybe not if you are having to aswell. Also look at air b&b we've booked with them for now and there's no questions asked look at houses cottages etc there's no contact with others then. My oh also hasn't got any contact restrictions just online
Hi,
I believe it's 7 plus days in a 12 month period. My person has given a family members address to his visor as he is likely to spend more than 7 nights there per year. At the lodge were you alone or did you go with any other families who have children? I think your oh should ask his visor for clarification on notification, ideally in writing so it can be challenged if necessary xxx
Edited to add I wouldn't risk staying somewhere that states they don't knowingly allow those on the register to stay with them xxx
I believe it's 7 plus days in a 12 month period. My person has given a family members address to his visor as he is likely to spend more than 7 nights there per year. At the lodge were you alone or did you go with any other families who have children? I think your oh should ask his visor for clarification on notification, ideally in writing so it can be challenged if necessary xxx
Edited to add I wouldn't risk staying somewhere that states they don't knowingly allow those on the register to stay with them xxx
Hi,
From wat I understood from our visor, is once u have stayed out 7 times over night, u then need to inform them even if its only for 3 nights, that's how it was explained to us any way.
From wat I understood from our visor, is once u have stayed out 7 times over night, u then need to inform them even if its only for 3 nights, that's how it was explained to us any way.
We were told by his PO and visor that is is only if he is staying more than 7 nights in the same place. If less than he does not need to declare.
So do you need to let them know if you're going away for a weekend? I'm now confused. Was hoping to book a weekend in a log cabin or something but don't want to fall foul of anything
With us, as I understand it, the contact restrictions don't matter if it has been removed as that's only legally prosecuted. In terms of safeguarding, you have to abide by it due to mitigating against potential risk. To be fair, if my child went to the home of a RSO, and I didn't know, I wouldn't be happy nor would I want him to go even though we know what we know.
I have found a lodge holiday that we could go to having searched T&C but it's in Yorkshire. Not sure where in the country you are
x
With us, as I understand it, the contact restrictions don't matter if it has been removed as that's only legally prosecuted. In terms of safeguarding, you have to abide by it due to mitigating against potential risk. To be fair, if my child went to the home of a RSO, and I didn't know, I wouldn't be happy nor would I want him to go even though we know what we know.
I have found a lodge holiday that we could go to having searched T&C but it's in Yorkshire. Not sure where in the country you are
x
It was just our children who were with us, otherwise alone.
it wasn't a family park as such. Nothing in the t&c of site and it was only 3 days.
tired, Yorkshire is not too far from us x
it wasn't a family park as such. Nothing in the t&c of site and it was only 3 days.
tired, Yorkshire is not too far from us x
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Jayjay
My oh has to inform of any over night I've asked him. He has to inform them with details even if his on a work over night stop off in say a premier inn. If it's for 7 nights or more he has to go in and that also counts as 7 nights throughout the year. Like I said in top post. Airbnb has been really great for us most of them you just collect the key out of a box at side of house or cottage and then put it back when you leave no contact with anyone unless you need something. I asked the lady that owns this place we going to if they allow people on a criminal record and reply was if it's got nothing to do with the stay it's nothing to do with us
My oh has to inform of any over night I've asked him. He has to inform them with details even if his on a work over night stop off in say a premier inn. If it's for 7 nights or more he has to go in and that also counts as 7 nights throughout the year. Like I said in top post. Airbnb has been really great for us most of them you just collect the key out of a box at side of house or cottage and then put it back when you leave no contact with anyone unless you need something. I asked the lady that owns this place we going to if they allow people on a criminal record and reply was if it's got nothing to do with the stay it's nothing to do with us
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This stricts me as one element that it should be able to deliver and communicate much clearer guidelines to both those implementing the requirement and the person required to adhere to it.
When I initially read the requirement I thought it meant 7 nights at the same address over a year, but I can see how it would be interpreted differently.
When I initially read the requirement I thought it meant 7 nights at the same address over a year, but I can see how it would be interpreted differently.
This is another example where PO and visors are not consistent.
My partner's visor says he has to disclose if he stays somewhere more than 7 nights overall in a twelve month period e.g. three days at a hotel, and another two nights months later at the same hotel.
We had let the visor know of mini trips for transparency just in case they were planning surprise visits. But after the fiasco of the trip to Scotland where we were threatened that local police might arrive we have decided to not mention our mini trips.
I don't understand how PO and visors can make up the rules as such. Unless there is a caveat somewhere that they can ask for more than what is in the SOR and SHPO, I do t see why they think they are justified.
My partner's visor says he has to disclose if he stays somewhere more than 7 nights overall in a twelve month period e.g. three days at a hotel, and another two nights months later at the same hotel.
We had let the visor know of mini trips for transparency just in case they were planning surprise visits. But after the fiasco of the trip to Scotland where we were threatened that local police might arrive we have decided to not mention our mini trips.
I don't understand how PO and visors can make up the rules as such. Unless there is a caveat somewhere that they can ask for more than what is in the SOR and SHPO, I do t see why they think they are justified.
this is what I'm struggling with Majestic. It's 1 weekend in a lodge for a weekend, just us. There's nothing official to say we have to tell them, except they are telling us we have to! And then to notify the local police that there is a S/O in the area - a S/O away with his partner and children! X
this is what I'm struggling with Majestic. It's 1 weekend in a lodge for a weekend, just us. There's nothing official to say we have to tell them, except they are telling us we have to! And then to notify the local police that there is a S/O in the area - a S/O away with his partner and children! X
I've rang the police officer to check after your post! He said, he would consider it good practice to inform if we were going to go away, purely so they know where he will be in terms of safeguarding. I also shared where I wanted to book, in the name of transparency. His attitude was that he prefers this transparency and he would check the site and terms and conditions. He checked the location/environmental checks and then got back to us and said, it would be okay for us to go there. I framed it in the sense that I was concerned that we needed to be doing the right thing, I would keep us to our lodge and not interact with others, my son would he with me at all times, there were no shared facilities and it's in the countryside so not near "populations"
Perhaps sometimes it's best to approach it from a we would like to do this perspective, we are approaching it from a safeguarding perspective and would like to be able to have a break away but only if it is protective towards ourselves and others?
Incidentally JayJay, it's in the Northallerton area site that I mentioned the other day!
Perhaps sometimes it's best to approach it from a we would like to do this perspective, we are approaching it from a safeguarding perspective and would like to be able to have a break away but only if it is protective towards ourselves and others?
Incidentally JayJay, it's in the Northallerton area site that I mentioned the other day!
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I understand what your trying to say Tired,but I just think they should put it in the 'rules' in the first place to make it easier for everyone, if that's what they want. Contradictory, we were going for 1 night a away in a hotel, just me and him and they said they didn't need to know that!
my concern is them notifying local police that an offender is staying in the area, as if an incident occurs while we there, who will they blame!
we do work well with professionals and definitely not against them, I just hate how nothing is black or white.
That's not far from us at all, thanks!
my concern is them notifying local police that an offender is staying in the area, as if an incident occurs while we there, who will they blame!
we do work well with professionals and definitely not against them, I just hate how nothing is black or white.
That's not far from us at all, thanks!
I understand what your trying to say Tired,but I just think they should put it in the 'rules' in the first place to make it easier for everyone, if that's what they want. Contradictory, we were going for 1 night a away in a hotel, just me and him and they said they didn't need to know that!
my concern is them notifying local police that an offender is staying in the area, as if an incident occurs while we there, who will they blame!
we do work well with professionals and definitely not against them, I just hate how nothing is black or white.
That's not far from us at all, thanks!
my concern is them notifying local police that an offender is staying in the area, as if an incident occurs while we there, who will they blame!
we do work well with professionals and definitely not against them, I just hate how nothing is black or white.
That's not far from us at all, thanks!
Last night was brought to you in association with "It's the Easter hols" featuring "One glass too many."
Haha made perfect sense! Lots of thought tired :) x
Out of interest what happens when say family who are unaware come to stay with thier child. do we have to notify someone? No contact restrictions internet only. child doesn't 'fit the risk' catagory if that makes sense?
My understanding is that disclosure would be required and expected
Thank you I will ensure he's not around anyway if they do decide to visit, there's only so long I can keep putting it off.
The thing is, I've been told that even if someone did happen to drop by, even if my son wasn't in, it would be disclosure as this is his address. So just be careful x
Yes, we can't have family with kids popping by without prior disclosure. Even if he isn't here we are still not allowed of have children's friends over without disclosing prior and their parents making the decision x
Who makes up these rules as legally they are not enforceable are they? no where does it say I shall disclose to any parent if they bring a child into my address.
No where does it say I will disclose to a parent carer if I go to thier house for more than 12 hours - it only states notifying an address within 3 days of being there more than 12hours.
How is this even policed? I am not bound my thier rules they won't even speak with me so if he is out and I make that arrangement I don't see what the issue is?
What happens when someone lives in a shared house?
Sorry im just out the other side so I'm struggling trying to decide what to do for the best!
No where does it say I will disclose to a parent carer if I go to thier house for more than 12 hours - it only states notifying an address within 3 days of being there more than 12hours.
How is this even policed? I am not bound my thier rules they won't even speak with me so if he is out and I make that arrangement I don't see what the issue is?
What happens when someone lives in a shared house?
Sorry im just out the other side so I'm struggling trying to decide what to do for the best!
Disclosure is something that the police would do, if they thought a child was at risk, but they often give the offender a choice, which is either you disclose to your friends for example, or we will do it.
In that situation, the offender will usually choose to do the disclosure themselves and that's how we end up with the idea that offenders HAVE to disclose.
But they don't HAVE to. They could say to the police, that they are not going to disclose and then the police might do the disclosure, which could be highly embarrassing.
So it depends if you want to take that risk or not.
In that situation, the offender will usually choose to do the disclosure themselves and that's how we end up with the idea that offenders HAVE to disclose.
But they don't HAVE to. They could say to the police, that they are not going to disclose and then the police might do the disclosure, which could be highly embarrassing.
So it depends if you want to take that risk or not.
Thank you for your reply, But if they thought a child was at risk surely that would have to be proportnate to the crime and the individuals risks? Not just a blanket disclosure of it?
I just feel people are making their own rules up? But sodding the consequences for the rest of us! I'm not saying it would be right for my girl to have a friend come play if he was here I agree, but he does not need to disclose if he was going to thier house for 2 hours but not that he would either.
But why can't my niece/nephew come here with thier parents without him being here, they are my support and my human rights surely? But we can all go to my mums for 11.30 hours? Nothing adds up to me?
plus if we decided to all stay over he would only have to notify upto 3 days after??
And my person noftified day after sentancing he stayed here more than 12 hours and 2months later it was me who referred myself to Ss as no one had even contacted me to let me know he was on the SOR!? Yeah safeguarding children right?
You say either the person discloses or they will disclose, has anyone experienced this as many things I've read are always threats etc
I just feel people are making their own rules up? But sodding the consequences for the rest of us! I'm not saying it would be right for my girl to have a friend come play if he was here I agree, but he does not need to disclose if he was going to thier house for 2 hours but not that he would either.
But why can't my niece/nephew come here with thier parents without him being here, they are my support and my human rights surely? But we can all go to my mums for 11.30 hours? Nothing adds up to me?
plus if we decided to all stay over he would only have to notify upto 3 days after??
And my person noftified day after sentancing he stayed here more than 12 hours and 2months later it was me who referred myself to Ss as no one had even contacted me to let me know he was on the SOR!? Yeah safeguarding children right?
You say either the person discloses or they will disclose, has anyone experienced this as many things I've read are always threats etc
Hi Summer
ive had the same convo with PO and visor. I sat and cried but I do now see it from the other side.
they said if I was to have children round even if he's not here, if their parents find out that he's on SOR, they can't prove that he was/wasn't and it's to protect him from allegations as well as protecting the children.
and asked me how would you feel if you found out that your child has been visiting a house where an offender lives.
I know most of us as responsible partners and mothers would ensure he wasnt there but sadly some don't. And I wouldn't like my children going to a SO house without my knowing.
we planned to visit family over Xmas and even Though it was only 3 hours we were made to disclose to the family members who had children, otherwise the visor would have disclosed. They rang them afterwards to ensure they were fully aware of the charges and to supervise their children at all times. It's horrendous.
Also when he stayed with parents during the investigation, their other grandchild used to visit for tea etc. The visor found out (we didn't know it was an issue at the time as he was being supervised at all times) and said if you don't tell the parents tonight we will. They actually rang during him disclosing and wanted to speak to them to ensure he had fully disclosed.
Again he has no contact restrictions but he might as well have! X
ive had the same convo with PO and visor. I sat and cried but I do now see it from the other side.
they said if I was to have children round even if he's not here, if their parents find out that he's on SOR, they can't prove that he was/wasn't and it's to protect him from allegations as well as protecting the children.
and asked me how would you feel if you found out that your child has been visiting a house where an offender lives.
I know most of us as responsible partners and mothers would ensure he wasnt there but sadly some don't. And I wouldn't like my children going to a SO house without my knowing.
we planned to visit family over Xmas and even Though it was only 3 hours we were made to disclose to the family members who had children, otherwise the visor would have disclosed. They rang them afterwards to ensure they were fully aware of the charges and to supervise their children at all times. It's horrendous.
Also when he stayed with parents during the investigation, their other grandchild used to visit for tea etc. The visor found out (we didn't know it was an issue at the time as he was being supervised at all times) and said if you don't tell the parents tonight we will. They actually rang during him disclosing and wanted to speak to them to ensure he had fully disclosed.
Again he has no contact restrictions but he might as well have! X
I get what you are saying JayJay, just then they should add onto the SHPO any contact with a under 18 needs to be disclosed to parents then or why when they say the 12 hour thing is it up to 3 days not prior to it taking place?
Definitely! I spat my dummy out with them in the beginning as none of this is in writing. they said it was more morally and protecting both offender and the children. I wanted it in black and white and felt like they were trying to catch us out with all the 'grey' areas x
Yeah I think that's all fine isn't it when it suits them!
So if I offer to take my kids friend to say soft play or park is that ok as am I not trusted incase I brought her to the house?
like you say he was just aswell have contact restrictions and well I'm just as well have too as long as I am supporting him (not living together) trying to do the best for my kids!
out of interest how did they get families numbers?
So if I offer to take my kids friend to say soft play or park is that ok as am I not trusted incase I brought her to the house?
like you say he was just aswell have contact restrictions and well I'm just as well have too as long as I am supporting him (not living together) trying to do the best for my kids!
out of interest how did they get families numbers?
The police are only supposed to disclose if there is a risk and you could argue that if the SHPO contains no restrictions on contact, then in the opinion of the judge, who issued the SHPO, there is no risk. The police are also supposed to take into account the effect of any disclosure, on your ability to live a 'normal' life.
But the police do have the power to disclose, regardless of what the SHPO says, so unless you can persuade them that they are exaggerating the risk, (which they probably are), then you won't be able to prevent them from disclosing.
The only mechanism you have to challenge them, would be to make a complaint and say they are disclosing, when they don't need to disclose. You could point to the fact that the SHPO has no restrictions on contact, as your proof that there is no risk.
There is no guarantee that they would accept your argument though.
But the police do have the power to disclose, regardless of what the SHPO says, so unless you can persuade them that they are exaggerating the risk, (which they probably are), then you won't be able to prevent them from disclosing.
The only mechanism you have to challenge them, would be to make a complaint and say they are disclosing, when they don't need to disclose. You could point to the fact that the SHPO has no restrictions on contact, as your proof that there is no risk.
There is no guarantee that they would accept your argument though.
I find this a nightmare they make up the rules as they go along or it's just gives them power .
My OH on the SOR only , never had a SHPO in place. He tells them everytime he goes away which isn't often but he stays with FM no children there. He stayed in a hotel just before Christmas to meet another FM and they wanted all the details and said you might get a visit when your there. It really made him uneasy it was for one night and this FM was unwell that's why he went.
He tells them because he feels like it does safeguard himself and they can't say it's a breach , because they love using that word here. They say it to him everytime, well we don't want you to breach??? They really do make me mad.
My OH on the SOR only , never had a SHPO in place. He tells them everytime he goes away which isn't often but he stays with FM no children there. He stayed in a hotel just before Christmas to meet another FM and they wanted all the details and said you might get a visit when your there. It really made him uneasy it was for one night and this FM was unwell that's why he went.
He tells them because he feels like it does safeguard himself and they can't say it's a breach , because they love using that word here. They say it to him everytime, well we don't want you to breach??? They really do make me mad.