Family and Friends Forum

The Phrase Paedophile

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Lucy from Stop it Now!

Member since
September 2018

482 posts

Posted Wed April 5, 2023 3:05pmReport post

We are reposting as requested by a forum user:

Hello Forum Users

We wanted to comment on the topic of the term “Paedophile” or “Paedophilia”. This word is commonly used in the media and society to describe anyone who has committed a sexual offence against children, although it is often wrongly used. The definition of the term is:

“Paedophilia (alternatively spelt pedophilia) is a psychiatric disroder in which an adult or older adolescent experiences a primary or exclusive sexual attraction to prepubescent children”

A lot of individuals who engage in online sexual offences against children do not have an exclusive sexual interest in children and they often have other intimate adult relations. Of course, this is not a true representation of every individual, some who engage in this behaviour do have an exclusive interest in children, but the majority do not.

For new users reading the forum and questioning whether your loved one has this interest we hope this helps provide some clarity. If you thought they may have been a Paedophile but are discovering they are not, that is ok and is why things like this platform exist, to help educate and support individuals. If your loved one does identify with this term, that is also ok and we are here to support everyone who has been affected by child sexual abuse in this way.

We hope this is helpful and provide clarity, especially to those new users.

Take Care

Lucy

Edited by moderator Thu April 13, 2023 4:09pm

Bettyboo65

Member since
June 2022

339 posts

Posted Wed April 5, 2023 6:45pmReport post

Thanks for the information.

if only everyone in this world and the media fully understood the meaning of the word paedophile then our persons might actually stand a chance of some form of normality after sentencing and maybe the sentences wouldn't have to be so harsh as to quell any public outrage.

My person suffered the worst sexual abuse outside the home from the age of 9 , we're now living with consequences of the knock and the terrible guilt and gut wrenching feelings of his own abuse (he's never spoken to anyone until now and he's in his 30's) if custodial is given I don't know if he could deal with it as he already dreads all male environments because of the abuse and has told me he couldn't cope if it comes to it xx

edel2020

Member since
March 2022

368 posts

Posted Sun April 9, 2023 11:39amReport post

Perhaps it's time for LFF to start using the term minor attracted person (MAP) instead? Unlike the P word, MAP includes those who are attracted to older children and teenagers, as well as those who are only attracted to very young children. There are a lot of people like this, who are now being arrested. The fact that many haters are opposed to the use of this wording, is quite interesting in itself.

They take the attitude, that if people wish to be called MAPs, rather than P, then we should call them P, to stop them getting what they want. It's about who controls the language. Using the P word is allowing the haters to control the language. On social media at the moment, there is a campaign to shout down anyone who uses the term MAP, by accusing them of 'normalising' child abuse. But what it is really about, is not allowing people who have committed offences to be humanised. The haters want society to think of our loved ones as monsters and I for one, do not want this to happen.

Taking back control of the debate by using person centred language is important. For example, saying 'person who has committed a sexual offence', puts the person first, while 'sex offender' defines somebody by their offence and makes that their identity. Very few of the people who are attracted to minors, want to be called P anymore, and nobody who has committed an offence wants to be called that word, because it is so hurtful. It has almost become a shorthand for monster, or psychopath, rather what it was originally intended for, which was a medical diagnosis.

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Thu April 13, 2023 6:48amReport post

Post deleted


Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am