Family and Friends Forum

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You are 100% correct. Lots of things in this journey make zero sense.

This!!!

This was one of my biggest fears. In our case it was reported in the press anonymously, however it was so factually inaccurate it beggars belief. We were back in court recently due to a deletion breach. The local rag reported it instead as... using social media and aliases to contact children! Had that had his name attached, can you only imagine?



Then, there's my job. I'm well known in my local area due to my job, to 1000s of people and families. If his name and our address had been published, and linked to this, I would have given up my career. I'd have lost out only livelihood, we would have lost the house as a result and the profession I have worked so hard in, the career I have built over 20+ would have been lost.

I also think the media should be more easily held to account. We haven't challenged this account as we were worried about "poking the bear" and then being named. Instead this news report is out there and is so distorted from truth, that if anyone read it and associated it with us other than the people who know and I have been able to correct, I'd be broken.

The thing is when an address appears in the media it doesn't affect just the offender. It opens a whole can of worms for the innocent people that live at that address plus who share that surname.

How these crimes are handled needs a big shake up. We keep saying this, if only these prejudices could be chipped away and sense flow in......... we can all pray - one day.....

It's because we don't know matter to the police.

We're considered "collateral damage".

I've not once been asked by any of the "professionals" involved in our case how I am doing. Not once. It makes me feel quite bitter.

You know what and I agree. And that's why, they "sympathise" with our situation but aren't willing to do anything about it

Tarred by association despite being innocent ourselves

However, I've made my mind up. I'm going to be a force for good in my area of expertise. I'm going to push so that our young children are informed and educated on the risk, pornography and the dangers, sharing of images of themselves and others etc and try and do what I can x

I want to be a force for good too, once I come through the worse of this nightmare. I am only 7 weeks in so don't have a huge amount of knowledge to share. But I would hope that in a few years that I could help others going through this uniquely awful experience.

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I think other European countries are more progressive than the UK. For instance Germany. They don't mention the name of the person sentenced in the article and if they do, it is along the lines of Stephen K., Mark A.

They also don't publish adresses or pictures either.

I think the UK is similar to the USA in that respect (though not quite as bad), where mob mentality and severe punishment for life is important, for both the offender and their family

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I agree, in my OH case, picture, address and some personal details were published. This was so traumatic.
I tried to get the local tag to remove at least the address but to say they were disinterested is an understatement.

No one speaks to me on the street, yet I have done nothing wrong.



Cornish Tea x

Yes it's is soo sad luckily for us this didn't happen however social said my children are at risk of emotional harm from bullying if people was to find out!

so professionals know this stuff can destroy kids but still let it happen! So sad they are not bothered about the impact

It's probably just a line they put in so devolve themselves of my responsibility if a child has emotional issues when older 'oh thats because of your dad'
I'm a bit like I can't change who thier dad is!

@Summer, the social worker also put risk of "future emotional harm" in our report. It's actually quite a serious term as it is ground for child removal if they decided to escalate things.