My children’s friends and their parents
Notifications OFF
They don't know. I spend my life avoiding certain situations. I feel like my kids aren't going to have a normal upbringing, no sleepovers, no tea parties, no friends visiting. How sad is that? And how May this affect them in later life? They will be adults by the time he gets of SOR.
it's like giving them the option of a normal childhood or not having their dad live with us. It's horrible.
one child has joined a sports team where nobody knows us, they are very social group, parents too. We keep being asked to join them, I either make up an excuse or go alone without oh.
does anyone have any advice? I'm scared if they find out they will disown me and child too, like several of our friends have done already since we disclosed. I feel lonely. I think our kids must feel lonely too.
the other issue is that although the kids know what he did, I don't think they fully understand all the implications and doesn't understand why friends can't come round, any advice or this or advice on how to explain? X
it's like giving them the option of a normal childhood or not having their dad live with us. It's horrible.
one child has joined a sports team where nobody knows us, they are very social group, parents too. We keep being asked to join them, I either make up an excuse or go alone without oh.
does anyone have any advice? I'm scared if they find out they will disown me and child too, like several of our friends have done already since we disclosed. I feel lonely. I think our kids must feel lonely too.
the other issue is that although the kids know what he did, I don't think they fully understand all the implications and doesn't understand why friends can't come round, any advice or this or advice on how to explain? X
That is so difficult. I don't have any advice, or experience, I just wanted to say I really feel for you and your family x sending love x
Jay I feel the same. We have 2 very good friends who know everything and they are happy for their kids to come over. However, they are not my kids school friends. My daughters aged 8 and 5, keep asking for play dates and it absolutely breaks my heart. My person hasn't been sentenced yet but I will not allow other kids over because their parents dont know. It really is s**t!
I worry, especially for my 8 year old, that not having a social life outside of school will restrict her from good friendships. Also as a parent makes me worry what other mums think as their kids are never invited to our house :-(
The whole thing makes me very sad
I worry, especially for my 8 year old, that not having a social life outside of school will restrict her from good friendships. Also as a parent makes me worry what other mums think as their kids are never invited to our house :-(
The whole thing makes me very sad
I am in a similar position, although there is not a contact clause in my persons SHPO and does not live at my address he obviously does visit the kids regularly and it is an addressed notified for purposes of the SOR. I also have not let my little one have friends over just well it's that accociation thing if that's makes sense although no one knows.
Sleepovers are a thing of the past in my eyes no one knows my person is on the SOR how do I know her friends dad is not also?? I don't trust anyone especially now and even before this I just don't think they are appropriate!
You could make excuses that you're having work done to the house? Maybe offer to take her friend to the park with you have a picnic and make more of it if possiable without actually going to your home.
Sleepovers are a thing of the past in my eyes no one knows my person is on the SOR how do I know her friends dad is not also?? I don't trust anyone especially now and even before this I just don't think they are appropriate!
You could make excuses that you're having work done to the house? Maybe offer to take her friend to the park with you have a picnic and make more of it if possiable without actually going to your home.
My eldest could probably understand and I've asked oh to explain why he can't have friends over (after I was so upset and having to lie to him and me being the bad mum for saying no!) but he/I have no idea what to say. I am also worried about him blurting something out at school such as 'you can't come to my house because of my Dad'
he knows dad did a bad thing and viewed some pictures and got told off off the police, he knows some family don't want to speak to him because they are angry with him, but we haven't gone into the full implications x
he knows dad did a bad thing and viewed some pictures and got told off off the police, he knows some family don't want to speak to him because they are angry with him, but we haven't gone into the full implications x
I had such a bad night after writing this last last. Couldn't sleep, anxiety was terrible. What did he do in a former life to deserve this :(
I think what did we do in a former life to deserve this, surely we couldn't have done anything that bad! X
What are the restrictions ?
if it's within your financial ability, book him a near by airbnb (or send him away to family member for overnight stay) and have the kids over.
if the house is a problem, take your child/ren and a couple her/his fave friends to a camping trip ? Just you and kids.
Perhaps that way the children have fun, you don't have guilt and the father is the only one rightfully missing out.
I thought that's what I would do..
Don't be too hard on yourself.
if it's within your financial ability, book him a near by airbnb (or send him away to family member for overnight stay) and have the kids over.
if the house is a problem, take your child/ren and a couple her/his fave friends to a camping trip ? Just you and kids.
Perhaps that way the children have fun, you don't have guilt and the father is the only one rightfully missing out.
I thought that's what I would do..
Don't be too hard on yourself.