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My son is really struggling

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Anxious mummy

Member since
February 2023

100 posts

Posted Sun April 16, 2023 10:54pmReport post

I have just spent the last hour with my 12 year old sobbing desperate for his dad to come home. Its been two months since the knock and I intend to divorce my husband. Before this even happened he had made awful mistakes in the past, so there is no way back for me. We are on two supervised visits a week at the moment. I know I need to tell my son that he won't be coming back ever and it will break his heart. My horrible ex has said he will tell him he doesn't want the divorce, basically making me look like the bad one for not letting him home.Has anyone else had this situation? I feel I need professional advice on how to handle this and what words to use. I am so scared I will mess this up or that he will be angry with me for letting down his dad (who he adores). I literally can't bear seeing my son so unhappy and worry he will never recover from this

K4

Member since
October 2022

612 posts

Posted Mon April 17, 2023 7:08pmReport post

That's so horrid for you, I'm so sorry to read this. My 12 YO is also struggling more so than my 14 YO. Have you told his school? My son is getting counselling through school - I think our circumstances allowed him to jump the waiting list...

Nemesis

Member since
July 2021

125 posts

Posted Tue April 18, 2023 2:46amReport post

My ex is " unique"



He also said things to the children which made me look bad to them. Mine is in prison now so I am being supported by children heard and seen. They are fab for giving advice on language.

think about where you have the supervised contact. Perhaps a contact centre would be better? That way you can be supported by professionals who will pick up on the language.



i found social services to be ok ( possibly the only one) but they helped me with options and listened. Maybe Camhs as well for support.



also reach out to legal options. It doesn't have to be expensive but his behaviour is another form of abuse. Massive hugs x

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Tue April 18, 2023 6:47amReport post

Post deleted


Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am