Did we do the right thing with my son?
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Hello everyone
My son lives in Austria and he was convicted for iioc in Austria and got a fine. His parents (that's us) live in UK and the police came here looking for him and wouldn't tell us why. We later found out that his conviction was "shared" to the UK and the police want to put him on the sex offender register.
My son got a good job offer in the UK. If he accepted it and moved back, he would be put on the SOR and face all the hassle of that.
We advised him to stay put in Austria and continue in his current job (which is not as good as the job offer in UK) - because in Austria they don't have this SOR and he is free. Nobody knows about his offence.
So he turned down the job in UK.
Now we are all having second thoughts if we did the right thing. Him coming back and potentially making a breach and getting fined or arrested or having his name in the papers terrified us to bits. And also if they tell his employer then that would be bad for him. But it was his dream job. His absolute dream. Maybe it would have worked out ok.. he would be on the SOR for 5 years and then off it.
Did we do the right thing?
My son lives in Austria and he was convicted for iioc in Austria and got a fine. His parents (that's us) live in UK and the police came here looking for him and wouldn't tell us why. We later found out that his conviction was "shared" to the UK and the police want to put him on the sex offender register.
My son got a good job offer in the UK. If he accepted it and moved back, he would be put on the SOR and face all the hassle of that.
We advised him to stay put in Austria and continue in his current job (which is not as good as the job offer in UK) - because in Austria they don't have this SOR and he is free. Nobody knows about his offence.
So he turned down the job in UK.
Now we are all having second thoughts if we did the right thing. Him coming back and potentially making a breach and getting fined or arrested or having his name in the papers terrified us to bits. And also if they tell his employer then that would be bad for him. But it was his dream job. His absolute dream. Maybe it would have worked out ok.. he would be on the SOR for 5 years and then off it.
Did we do the right thing?
The freedom he is afforded in Austria far outweighs a job in my opinion x
Absolutely you have done the right thing
Your son can live a normal life in Austria
If he is ok and is working, as hard as it is he is not home it's so difficult for you as parents
A new job in the uk brings so many different emotions and restrictions x
Your son can live a normal life in Austria
If he is ok and is working, as hard as it is he is not home it's so difficult for you as parents
A new job in the uk brings so many different emotions and restrictions x
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Absolutely.
I think most people on here would probably jump at the chance to make some sacrifices on their career in return for no one to ever know of their crime or live with restrictions. He's very fortunate in many ways to have that as an option.
It would be worry getting some legal advise though so he doesn't have this hanging over him forever.
I think most people on here would probably jump at the chance to make some sacrifices on their career in return for no one to ever know of their crime or live with restrictions. He's very fortunate in many ways to have that as an option.
It would be worry getting some legal advise though so he doesn't have this hanging over him forever.
Might be worth looking into when his conviction is spent to have an idea if and when he can return to the UK without restrictions.
My partner can not be choosey on jobs he can get. I'm hoping once it is spent he can look for a better job with real career progression. Thankfully he has an ok job but he can't progress (e.g. chartership) because they require background checks in convictions.
My partner can not be choosey on jobs he can get. I'm hoping once it is spent he can look for a better job with real career progression. Thankfully he has an ok job but he can't progress (e.g. chartership) because they require background checks in convictions.
Thank you everyone. It is reassuring. But at the back of my mind I just think "Its possible he moves back here, starts the job, does the notifications (sex offender register stuff) smoothly and the police don't tell his employers. It could work out"
I was thinking: is living with restrictions really that bad?
What a good life he could have had here. But I count my blessings: there was no media attention in Austria on his conviction.
I was thinking: is living with restrictions really that bad?
What a good life he could have had here. But I count my blessings: there was no media attention in Austria on his conviction.
majestictopaz - sorry to hear about your partner. I know how daunting it is.
The sad thing is my son is subbject to notification for 5 years.. God. It is a punishment on top of the conviction
The sad thing is my son is subbject to notification for 5 years.. God. It is a punishment on top of the conviction