Life upside down again
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Rant alert . So my persons probation offer did another ss referal for me , even though he never comes near my house or 16 year old daughter. Apparently I'm not allowed to contact him at all , basically got called a bad parent and I'm put on a waiting list to be assessed . Then , some dimbo from housing rang my persons hostel and told one of the key workers what he's been convicted with .that was supposed to be done by po to the manager. The manager was very good with him but the words all over the hostel now and he's had to leave and been put in an overnight place with a bed he has to leave at 9am and has nowhere to go while he's getting sorted . He's to ring everyone from the street. What a *hit show . Just when things were settling and he was doing great . We both were . So basically he's homeless and I'm not allowed to talk to him . Head's melted . Anyone any opinions on this ?
Why aren't you allowed to talk to him ? Just curious we aren't at charges yet but I have a 15yr old we are still waiting on them allowing me supervised contact but I have been threatened with cpp if I get back with him after court as they know I still love him they've been dragging their heels for months she's not seen him since December. Surely they can't stop you speaking to him unless theirs a good reason too I just don't understand them at all I have no idea what I'm doing with them half the time I never know to speak my mind or sit there and say as little as possible, sorry I can't give advice right now as I'm early on in all this and so clueless lol xx
I've got opinions but no advise.
Its absolutely ludicrous that everything that is shown to reduce reoffending (family connection, a safe home and employment) is made so difficult. We are in the process of deciding where we will live when my person is out, we've been told it might not be possible to move whilst on probation because the new probation need to accept him, but yet it also seems completely acceptable for him to be homeless where it'd be much harder to monitor him.
Surely these people need to be held accountable? Isn't there a GDPR breach there?
I hope someone can offer some practical advise.
Its absolutely ludicrous that everything that is shown to reduce reoffending (family connection, a safe home and employment) is made so difficult. We are in the process of deciding where we will live when my person is out, we've been told it might not be possible to move whilst on probation because the new probation need to accept him, but yet it also seems completely acceptable for him to be homeless where it'd be much harder to monitor him.
Surely these people need to be held accountable? Isn't there a GDPR breach there?
I hope someone can offer some practical advise.
Hey , apparently just me being in contact with him is a risk . Well I'll wait on her call and be better prepared hopefully because she totally threw me . She made him out to be a monster !!! Exactly sal he was doing great , there's plenty of breaches , found out the GP told housing . Was supposed to be po. It was all set up for this week. Now he's in a welcome center homeless again ringing around trying to get the people who should be 'helping ' him to do just that . It's just never ending. Three short convos he had to ith decoys and all this , he's got so much help and is bettering himself but everyone just sees him as a 'p' who deserves nothing. How is he ever gonna get rebilitated he'd be better off in prison .
If I ts on speaker phone and your there how is it a risk if your monitoring it they make no sense.. we aren't allowed video calls because he downloaded video so they are saying he could record it and play it back so ridiculous. I haven't challenged them on that yet am too scared. I totally understand that everyone is just seen as a p when they've done these crimes it's so sad when they are trying to rebuild themselves it's disheartening it isn't helpful xx
Hi cherry . It's not speaking to my daughter. It's me being in any contact with him ! Away from my home . Even by phone or text . I'm all he's got in way of support. So I told her I'd still be texting him so now I'm on a waiting list for an assessment to see if I can safeguard my child . Just by talking to him . I told her he's a human being , I know everything he's done . Don't condone it but he's worked so hard , admitted everything and got as much help as he possibly could . Now he's on the street ls and isn't allowed to talk to his only form if support? I'm fuming
I get they've to do their jobs but surely this us a tad too far considering we've been in contact since the knock two and half years ago. Lol rant off thanks guys for your support it's priceless to me as I've noone else x
I get they've to do their jobs but surely this us a tad too far considering we've been in contact since the knock two and half years ago. Lol rant off thanks guys for your support it's priceless to me as I've noone else x
Oh my gosh, this scares the absolute life out of me. It's as if our people (and us) are effectively given a life sentence by all the authorities.
Sorry really didn't mean to scare you . I know many on here had great social workers, this one was very opinionated and I felt totally judged .it's so unfair how us partners are treated like we've did the crime . Actually. We are treated worse .
Newlady sorry, yeah that is excessive I understand why your upset I also understand where you are wanting to support him as my ex just lost his dad 2 weeks ago he lost his mam 4yrs ago so he was the only one he had left besides us he has his brother but he lives in another part of the country and has distanced himself from him so he only has me now I hope they don't try these tactics with me after charges it definitely doesn't make sense in trying to safeguard kids if they have no one left and nothing to live for then it's going to push them to do it again no logic in it. I hope the assesment t goes in your favor I'd seek legal advice just to see where you stand if it doesn't xx
No advice, just sympathy for you and OH - so frustrating that there seems to be a determination to punish offenders above the punishment given by the courts.
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Thanks guys , yes plenty of complaints will be made . Yeah they closed my case as he wasn't like living here or having any access to my daughter (she's not his ) .it's like he is as purposely dropped in it .he's loading everything over and over because of others mishaps. I'm worried sick about him . Solicitor is a good idea thanks I never thought of that he interesting to have a conversation with them .
Nothings changed , his po kk ew we were having contact with eachother this whole time . Po rang me and said she had to do referral incase we wanted overnights at mine as we both told her that would be a long way away . So I get why she had to do it but telling me I can't talk to him is terrible . It's too far . Especially now since he's on the streets and going through all this again every time he gets on his feet . He's been punished enough .
Aargh Newlady, you have been my beacon of hope with your happy ending! This is so unfair, SS jumping to conclusions based on, it seems, their own personal feelings, prejudices and misconceptions about the the crime and the people involved. And then have stirred it up with the housing person deciding that they "knew best" and decided to blab personal information about your person to the hostel. I feel hopping mad on your behalf. The housing staff have put your person at risk of harm.
This sounds like it needs a rocket of an email to the local council about data protection (although this would presumably have to come from your person) and also a rocket to social services about being proportionate in their actions. How on earth can they justify a prohibition on you simply speaking to your person? What extra protection for your child (if it were needed) would this achieve, over and above anything else that you're doing?
This sounds like it needs a rocket of an email to the local council about data protection (although this would presumably have to come from your person) and also a rocket to social services about being proportionate in their actions. How on earth can they justify a prohibition on you simply speaking to your person? What extra protection for your child (if it were needed) would this achieve, over and above anything else that you're doing?
Hi bitter bean . It feels like we were just getting settled then this . Oh there will be complaints made . We are both a lot stronger now and are fuming . I'm off to see him now as he's wandering around town on his own thank goodness I'm off work today . Thank you bitter bean xx
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Thanks daffodil, that's exactly it we are sorry we were honest now I have a feeling she was just looking any excuse to get me done. He's doing good he's settled and he's close enough now so maybe all this was a god send . I've a whole life at of things I'm gonna say about po and ss . X
Okay. So I can't sleep because it's our GCSE exam tomorrow and I keep lying here thinking of possible questions to come up but this digresses from the point of me sending this and is more or an argh on my part.
Can I make a suggestion? Everything that has happened is clearly unacceptable and I would be furious, but I'm also one who likes to stay one step ahead... so, if this was me, and at the mercy of these services, I'd be enrolling myself on a safeguarding course. I'd mitigate against any "concerns" by making sure they didn't have anything they could get me on. There are deee safeguarding courses online and I know Hays do them. That way, if they ever come at you you can back it up against their concerns by saying, I also wanted to make sure I understood the need to safeguard so have enrolled myself on xyz course so I can fully understand and possibly risks or implication. You take your power back?
Just a thought on flipping their narrative unexpectedly xxx
Can I make a suggestion? Everything that has happened is clearly unacceptable and I would be furious, but I'm also one who likes to stay one step ahead... so, if this was me, and at the mercy of these services, I'd be enrolling myself on a safeguarding course. I'd mitigate against any "concerns" by making sure they didn't have anything they could get me on. There are deee safeguarding courses online and I know Hays do them. That way, if they ever come at you you can back it up against their concerns by saying, I also wanted to make sure I understood the need to safeguard so have enrolled myself on xyz course so I can fully understand and possibly risks or implication. You take your power back?
Just a thought on flipping their narrative unexpectedly xxx
There are also two documents that professional services are legally bound to use when it comes to children.
KCSIE - keeping children safe in education
WTSC - Working together to safeguard children.
if you google them they're easily accessible, but being able to know the contents woikd put you in a stronger position? Becaus me they're the documents they all work from initially. They're the statutory backbone of safeguarding policy xxx
KCSIE - keeping children safe in education
WTSC - Working together to safeguard children.
if you google them they're easily accessible, but being able to know the contents woikd put you in a stronger position? Becaus me they're the documents they all work from initially. They're the statutory backbone of safeguarding policy xxx
Thank you so much tired I'll definitely do that and I'm a nurse so I've did sooo many safeguarding courses . I told myum and she laughed said I'm the most protective parent especially with my Daughter, as she's my only one and my baby .she's going to concert with her friends soon I'm gonna drive then wait outside while it's on I even bought her a rape alarm because I'm terrified lol . I would never ever put her at risk . Thing that makese angry too , I've worked so hard and over come eo much to raise my children well and they are all well educated and ate lovely people,yet a few people on my area are druggie addicts ,have constant party's , strange people coming and going and is SS involved? Nope .
Thank you so much tired I'll definitely do that and I'm a nurse so I've did sooo many safeguarding courses . I told myum and she laughed said I'm the most protective parent especially with my Daughter, as she's my only one and my baby .she's going to concert with her friends soon I'm gonna drive then wait outside while it's on I even bought her a rape alarm because I'm terrified lol . I would never ever put her at risk . Thing that makese angry too , I've worked so hard and over come eo much to raise my children well and they are all well educated and ate lovely people,yet a few people on my area are druggie addicts ,have constant party's , strange people coming and going and is SS involved? Nope .