Getting over initial shock
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My dad was arrested at the weekend for sexualised communications with minors. He's currently under investigation so no idea what the police will eventually find. It's come as a massive shock to the whole family and we're, naturally, struggling to come to terms with what happened. I'm feeling constantly sad right now and am grieving as I know nothing will ever be the same again.
I was close to my dad but am finding it hard at the moment to envisage what our relationship will look like from now on. I don't feel right now that I want to talk to him. I will eventually and obviously I don't want the only subject of conversation to be this, but I also don't really see how I'm going to manage to talk about day to day ordinary stuff with him.
Any general advice as to how to get through these initial stages and try and maintain some sort of a relationship?
I was close to my dad but am finding it hard at the moment to envisage what our relationship will look like from now on. I don't feel right now that I want to talk to him. I will eventually and obviously I don't want the only subject of conversation to be this, but I also don't really see how I'm going to manage to talk about day to day ordinary stuff with him.
Any general advice as to how to get through these initial stages and try and maintain some sort of a relationship?
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I always think it's harder for family members than spouses, as discussing the sex stuff is deeply odd.
I'm so sorry you find yourself here. The first few weeks are awful. Just be kind to yourself. Be exceedingly careful who you tell. Call your GP for help, call the LFF helpline too.
What has always helped me through this is remembering that my person is a good man who has done a bad thing (love the sinner, hate the sin etc). Some days that is easier than others.
you're in for a long journey, so don't rush any decisions. Do things that help you feel grounded (take a bath, do some yoga or similar, go for a walk....)
Xx
I'm so sorry you find yourself here. The first few weeks are awful. Just be kind to yourself. Be exceedingly careful who you tell. Call your GP for help, call the LFF helpline too.
What has always helped me through this is remembering that my person is a good man who has done a bad thing (love the sinner, hate the sin etc). Some days that is easier than others.
you're in for a long journey, so don't rush any decisions. Do things that help you feel grounded (take a bath, do some yoga or similar, go for a walk....)
Xx
Oh, and listen to the world according to the knock podcast - loads of great advice x
Thank you K4. It's super helpful having this forum and knowing I'm not alone.